Hello all. This is my first post. I made friends with a guy with AS a little over a year ago. I am not on the spectrum. I had an extra concert ticket because a friend bailed on me at the last minute, so I posted on craigslist looking for someone to take the ticket or carpool with. This guy showed up, and that is how we met. He's in his early 20s, I'm in my 30s. The extent of our relationship has been going to lunch, going to the record shop, and hitting the local shows occasionally. We hang out about once a month. I've made it very clear to him in the past that I don't have the time or interest in developing our relationship any further because I am going through many changes in my life and am highly focused on my family and my home. But he continually seems to get jealous of my other friends, and recently of my family. He attempted to rent the apartment next door to me so that "we could hang out all the time", he texts all hours of the night (and I've asked him not to). Last easter weekend, he asked me to do something and I told him that I was unable because I was having family from out of town. Then while I was having dinner with that family, he texted me "I'm outside your house, wanna hangout?" My wife is pregnant and is starting to get creeped out by him and his jealousy and worry about our safety. Honestly, I'm starting to get put off as well.
Obviously, I do not have the capacity to give him the relationship that he wants and if he continues to act this way I'm going to have to sever our friendship. I don't want to do that because he has a history of suicidal behavior, and also because I know that people with Asperger's lose friends regularly because of their condition. But I do not want a "BFF." All of my friendships are casual and low maintenance and this is the way I prefer it. How can I handle this?
Obviously, I do not have the capacity to give him the relationship that he wants and if he continues to act this way I'm going to have to sever our friendship. I don't want to do that because he has a history of suicidal behavior, and also because I know that people with Asperger's lose friends regularly because of their condition. But I do not want a "BFF." All of my friendships are casual and low maintenance and this is the way I prefer it. How can I handle this?