Most Uncomfortable Moment

[total-recoil]

I got into a very uncomfortable situation last night. I was out on the streets walking the dog when a stranger came up to stroke the dog. This is the truly painful bit. I advised the lady not to come up to the dog too suddenly but that it was probably O.K. if she had stroked the dog before. She looked at me with a very shocked expression but at that point I was still clueless. Then she asks me what is the matter and don't I know who it is? Then it clicks. It's a family member and I didn't have a clue who it was so then I try to cover it up. Actually, number (1) she was wearing quite a big wooly hat and number (2) she was bang out of context since I bumped into her on a main road. However, the damage is done as no matter how I tried to bluff it off the bottom line is I failed to recognise a member of my family I see every day and who strokes the same dog every day. I suppose I am going to have to find the opportune moment to explain to her about prosopagnosia but I must admit this time even I am shocked. I've struggled to recognise people before but not to recognise someone so familiar is pretty bad.

 

[Aspie510]

If that's your most uncomfortable moment, then I envy you ;D. Technical mental glitches happen to me all the time. I've lately adopted a "who cares" attitude to my glitches. I've had to.

In a pinch...I would say any one of the many times I've gone off the rail with anger and frustration in public would suffice.

But, no... what REALLY got me one time was when I was traveling with one of my ex-girlfriends (they ALL become ex-girlfriends eventually) and I forgot my razor, I had an episode in the bathroom where I started beating myself and banging my head into the wall. My girlfriend came in to see the ruckus and I was busted. My dirty little secret exposed. That's how I used to get along with the real world, I would physically abuse myself when my brain lost even a little bit of control. Control at all costs. How do you explain that to a "norm"?

 

[Aspieistj]

I have fairly severe prosopagnosia and have had many moments like the one you describe. PA is NOT your fault; it is your cross to bear. My only coping mechanism is to explain to or remind the unrecognized person that I have PA. When people have heard an explanation often enough they usually realize you have a valid neurological condition. If they can't/won't learn even a little about PA, shame on them! Would they be angry at a deaf person for not hearing, or a blind person for not seeing? If so, they are the person with the problem. I "came out" almost 20 years ago and it is now automatic for me to tell people I have a neurological condition that interferes with facial recognition. Some people find the concept funny and try to "test" me, but others are likely to ask questions about what I see when I look at them. I don't mind teaching someone who honestly has never heard of PA. Until they have had a decent explanation it isn't their fault if they don't understand. I have found that people are more likely to accept the concept of "brain damage" and PA than to accept that I have AS and will never think and feel as they do. The "friend" I often complain about is an RN and after a lot of questions she did learn that PA is a valid diagnosis. When I dream, people don't have visible faces. However, regarding the fact that I often annoy her because I am an Aspie, she has never been able to grasp the idea that I can't "just remember not to say or do "THAT awful thing again. We don't yet have enough magic pills to stop ourselves from doing things that annoy those who aren't afflicted. I will be eternally grateful that my 2 kids have neither PA or AS. They do have allergies, high blood pressure, diabetes, and low thyroid--as I do. At least there are medications to help with physical illnesses.

 

[Arashi222]

It can be very very bad for me on top not usually recognizing people sometimes I am legally blind so my vision isn't good so if you change anything about you I will forget who you are. I had a customer who changed her hair color and I didn't know who she was until she said Arashi its me don't you like my hair... I was ohhh hi...(In my mind was going oh S.H.I.T.)

 

[total-recoil]

I have fairly severe prosopagnosia and have had many moments like the one you describe. PA is NOT your fault; it is your cross to bear. My only coping mechanism is to explain to or remind the unrecognized person that I have PA. When people have heard an explanation often enough they usually realize you have a valid neurological condition. If they can't/won't learn even a little about PA, shame on them! Would they be angry at a deaf person for not hearing, or a blind person for not seeing? If so, they are the person with the problem. I "came out" almost 20 years ago and it is now automatic for me to tell people I have a neurological condition that interferes with facial recognition. Some people find the concept funny and try to "test" me, but others are likely to ask questions about what I see when I look at them. I don't mind teaching someone who honestly has never heard of PA. Until they have had a decent explanation it isn't their fault if they don't understand. I have found that people are more likely to accept the concept of "brain damage" and PA than to accept that I have AS and will never think and feel as they do. The "friend" I often complain about is an RN and after a lot of questions she did learn that PA is a valid diagnosis. When I dream, people don't have visible faces. However, regarding the fact that I often annoy her because I am an Aspie, she has never been able to grasp the idea that I can't "just remember not to say or do "THAT awful thing again. We don't yet have enough magic pills to stop ourselves from doing things that annoy those who aren't afflicted. I will be eternally grateful that my 2 kids have neither PA or AS. They do have allergies, high blood pressure, diabetes, and low thyroid--as I do. At least there are medications to help with physical illnesses.

My own prosopagnosia is a real mystery. I swatted up on it a bit and, so far as I understand, there are different types of it. The funny thing is you could show me photographs of actors and I would know who they are. It seems that my condition will suddenly just appear at set times and I know stressful situations make it far worse,
Those of you who share my problem will relate to the following: That situation where you meet someone in a shop but aren't totally certain it is them so you refrain from trapping yourself into a possible humiliating experience by not calling them by name. There is a girl I flirt with a bit who works in a shop and has totally red hair due to her dye. If she ever changes the tint or something I find myself in this weird situation I'm not sure if it's her or not. So, I just wait till maybe I can pick up her voice or she "gives herself away". I have many times simply blundered in and assumed either a stranger is someone I know or someone I know well is a stranger.
The worst nightmare situation I had was working in a hotel. Someone asks for some keys to a room and I hand them over. 5 minutes later I recall I forgot to give the person a receipt or something but address the wrong person. "I don't know anything about any keys!", he says. Then panic sets in as you don't dare keep asking lots of people out of fear of appearing to be nuts. Or you will ask the same person the same thing twice not knowing you just spoke to him or her.
Pretty awful was the time I asked a family member for directions in a shop, assuming it was a total stranger. You get puzzled looks and then you try to make out it was just a joke but they don't buy it, Nobody is that good an actor and they work out you didn't really know who they were.
Anyway the woman I referred to in my first post, I did raise the issue of not recognising her. I blamed it on the wooly hat. She just accepted I hadn't recognised her and said she found it odd but I suppose the hat helped me pass it off as a simple mistake.

 

[Ylva]

I have a friend who, when shown a series of pictures of celebrities, said he recognised most, and got most of them wrong.

I guess it is stress-induced for me, too. Facial features just lose their meaning at some point, much like words if the stress is aurally based.