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Featured Missed Opportunities

Discussion in 'Love, Relationships and Dating' started by JDShredds, Apr 11, 2019.

  1. JDShredds

    JDShredds Well-Known Member

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    I'm not sure if there's a thread like this, but I figure people will have plenty of stories to share. I'd like to think this will become a place for people to share situations where you met someone and for whatever reason missed your chance to do something with it (or maybe there's a Cinderella story!).

    ---

    So, I'll start it this way (story time!): My motivation to start this thread is that earlier this week I met a beautiful girl while at the Veterinary Clinic for my sick cat (my cat wasn't eating and was lethargic; and yes, is okay and recovering). She had also brought her cat in and, kind of mildly surprise to me, she chose to sit in the one available chair just next to me rather than any of the 3 available on the other side of the front door. Maybe some people are like that, but I always aim for "space" when its available. I had an internal "?! Be cool, self!!" moment. lol

    We ended up chatting much of the waiting time, sharing some stories about our cats as well as both observing a very sick dog in the corner (in fact, she gave up her room spot when they called for her, saying that dog needed priority, so she had to wait another 5 minutes or so - I liked her generosity and empathy, as I suck at expressing it but I experience it a lot). If I wasn't such a nervous wreck at the time, I would have asked her casually to coffee or something, but I was at my wits end. When it was her time to go, she wished me good luck in a very sincere tone.

    In hindsight, I'm really kicking myself. Also in hindsight, I realize our conversation had a different tone than typical waiting room conversations... usually strangers are a bit louder for all to hear, like a "public" conversation, but we stayed fairly hushed and 1 on 1, almost as if we knew each other. In fact, I've had butterflies all week since then. Part of me thinks I'm just too damn sensitive to this kind of thing (yes), but another part of me thinks its a legit signal and I really missed out (maybe also yes).

    I even thought up the idea to contact the receptionist that was there and just offer my name and number as a relay, so as to not request any info and just extend an olive branch. So that way its her choice, and if it was mutual she'll contact me. But then I think that's slightly crazy. (Part of me thinks its cutely romantic, but still slightly crazy).

    Complicating matters is that I'm in the process of divorce (over 1 1/2 years of separation though and with no plans at reconciling, so I've effectively been single for a while now), and I may be moving away this year.

    I also had to have some "discussions" with myself via my journal to realize I've been holding mental blocks, and its time to finalize that divorce already and set myself free - and that I vow to pull the trigger when my instinct says so (whenever I catch on... needless to say, I suck at picking up real time body language, especially when nervous).

    Anyway. That's the story for now. How crazy am I? Should I just let it go and use it as a lesson? Or should I actually try my crazy idea as I've got nothing to lose? OR, because of my circumstances, should I let it go because of the old saying, "Careful what you wish for: you just might get it?"

    P.S. Butterflies in the stomach... they make you crazy.
     
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  2. Fino

    Fino Alex V.I.P Member

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    I've never had an experience of that nature, because I always just go for it. I think it's because I think about death so frequently and maybe because I've felt I nearly died at least several times. The shortness of life has become so ingrained in me that I can't comprehend someone wasting time not doing something they want to do.

    So it's probably not surprising that I say go for it! I don't even fully understand the plan you described, but whatever it is sounds good to me! :D

    I don't know if I'm the best advice-giver with this kind of stuff, so let's wait and see this balanced out with words of wisdom from the rest of the gang. ;)
     
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  3. JDShredds

    JDShredds Well-Known Member

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    That's something that is gradually getting more and more ingrained in me, but I'm a bit slow on the uptake sometimes. The complicated life circumstances got in my head, but I've got to stop letting it do that to me.

    I realize I may not have explained the idea. I didn't catch her name, but I know when she was there and why her cat was in for a visit (she told me the whole shebang of his two infected claws), and the receptionist Sam was just across from us the whole time. I'd be asking the receptionist to call that client and offer my name and number if she'd like to contact the guy she sat next to in the lobby on Monday morning. Simple as that. No strings, no info requests, just an olive branch. If she had the same sense as me (and is actually single), she'd contact me. If not, no harm no foul. A weird request for the receptionist I'm sure. :laughing:

    I am definitely curious what others around here think. And also what kind of similar experiences they may have had.
     
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  4. Fino

    Fino Alex V.I.P Member

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    Oh, I see!

    Well, that sounds fun! If you know the receptionist well enough for that to be a reasonable request, I don't see why not!

    But again, I'm a duck with ADHD, so who knows. :rolleyes:

    ...


    Do it!

    :D
     
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  5. Fridgemagnetman

    Fridgemagnetman I only have one V.I.P Member

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    At least you're a duck in water .
     
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  6. JDShredds

    JDShredds Well-Known Member

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    Welp. I took a shot at it this morning after a whole bunch of work up (I was terrified lol, how can I put this as cheesy but true as possible?... "I chose love over fear."). It almost worked, but since she was also there on a walk-in they needed more info to find her than if she was on a scheduled appointment. So I'm left with the old "if its meant to be you'll see each other again." Gee thanks. :sweat:

    And so life goes on. Lesson learned (PULL THE TRIGGER NEXT TIME, SELF). At least we have the same vet and live in the same town, but I'm a typical introverted Aspie... I go out about as often as you see shooting stars. Regardless, I'll remember this. Time to rediscover that "bold" self I used to be known for; the one that goes after what he wants and doesn't take no for an answer.

    I also feel like I "leveled up" for having the guts to try something unusual that most people wouldn't. :laughing: To hell with looking weird. You never make the shots you don't take. Get busy living or get busy dying. Shoot for the moon, even if you miss you're among the stars. Pick your phrase.

    Also an aside: 12 years ago I was DX'd with panic disorder; sought help (CBT was most helpful); and no longer have PD but do occasionally panic when unusually stressed. I panicked this morning (to the point that I went full autistic... I couldn't stand any way other than on my tippy toes and I was stimming like MAD) but instead of being scared, I realized I was EXCITED, so I sang a hopeful song (which leveled me out and gave me a sense of power and control) and then made the call when my body settled a bit. Immediately after, while I was disappointed, I was relieved and proud of myself for doing it.
     
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  7. Fino

    Fino Alex V.I.P Member

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    I don't get it! :confused::(
     
  8. Fridgemagnetman

    Fridgemagnetman I only have one V.I.P Member

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    Phrase for being in an uncomfortable place is

    A duck out of water .

    Very common.
     
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  9. Fino

    Fino Alex V.I.P Member

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    Wow, a phrase that involves ducks! :D

    I thought of the "out of water" part but couldn't remember the rest or what it meant and then thought of, "fish out of water," and figured that meant you are quickly dying a horrible death. :confused:
     
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  10. Fridgemagnetman

    Fridgemagnetman I only have one V.I.P Member

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    Might have been a fish

    I'm so used to making things up I can't tell the difference anymore :)
     
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  11. Fino

    Fino Alex V.I.P Member

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    They both come up on Google, but "fish out of water" comes up more readily, while "duck to water," comes up, but "fish to water," never comes up, so "duck" can be used for both, apparently," and "fish" can only be used for one.

    I supposed fish aren't especially good at swimming. :eek:
     
  12. JDShredds

    JDShredds Well-Known Member

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    I'm pretty sure the normal phrase is a duck on water. Which implies being at home/comfortable. The "out of water" one is definitely "a fish out of water." I guess fridge magnets tend to mix up sayings. :laughing:

    Speaking of these sayings and mixing them up... Apparently I'm a duck out of water when it comes to spontaneously asking women out on dates.
     
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  13. Fino

    Fino Alex V.I.P Member

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    I can't find anything about a duck "on" water! :confused:
     
  14. Fridgemagnetman

    Fridgemagnetman I only have one V.I.P Member

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    I guess I said 'don't make sense,make sausages' once to often
     
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  15. JDShredds

    JDShredds Well-Known Member

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    Find harder. :tearsofjoy:
     
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  16. Fridgemagnetman

    Fridgemagnetman I only have one V.I.P Member

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    Another missed opportunity....
     
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  17. Fino

    Fino Alex V.I.P Member

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    Now twice too often. :D
     
  18. tducey

    tducey Well-Known Member

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    Wishing you all the best, I think if things are meant to be they'll happen.
     
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  19. Tom

    Tom Well-Known Member

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    Maybe it wasn't a missed opportunity so much as a disaster averted.

    What if the woman didn't choose to sit next to you, the cat did? And had you fallen into the snare the lady would have asked you over and turned you into a mouse?
     
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  20. JDShredds

    JDShredds Well-Known Member

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    The jokers sure are out in spades today. :laughing:
     
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