Memory issues

[DesertRose]

I don't know how to word this, or exactly where to put it. Let me just put it out there...

Is it a common thing for those with ASD to not remember exactly what was said, or what happened in an argument, or conflict?

For instance, a big argument ensues, and when it is over, you can't remember how it even started, or who said what, and possibly why it even happened.

Is this an ASD thing?

Thanks.

 

[BraidedPony]

It sounds like a stress thing. It happens to me when I’m being yelled at. Otherwise I remember everything including tone of voice, etc.

 

[Tom]

I don't have that problem myself, and don't think I have heard it mentioned much just in connection with autism. You might try a search (ie. Autism Memory loss, etc) to see if they have made any connections in studies.

 

[Catalyst]

Typically there's an issue with short term memory in Autism, though supposedly we excel in long term memory. My memory isn't great in general, though the few things I do remember over the course of my lifetime is very detailed.

 

[DesertRose]

I don't have that problem myself, and don't think I have heard it mentioned much just in connection with autism. You might try a search (ie. Autism Memory loss, etc) to see if they have made any connections in studies.

Thank you, I wasn't too sure how to word it.

 

[DesertRose]

Typically there's an issue with short term memory in Autism, though supposedly we excel in long term memory. My memory isn't great in general, though the few things I do remember over the course of my lifetime is very detailed.

Same for me. I can remember the strangest details, lol

 

[BrokenBoy]

Although I don't forget the event all together I always forget details behind the events such as what exactly was said. It all seems to go by so fast..

 

[NTGUY]

Im not sure what to label him so I usually just call him my "crush" is an aspie. I have noticed he forgets things I tell him sometimes. but he has very good memory of other things. Just the other day we were watching Archer on Netflix (he has seen all the episodes a few times) he can remember every word perfectly that will be said on the show before they say it.

 

[Peter Morrison]

DesertRose - I tend to remember conversations and conflicts in a way that is similar to your own. I never saw it as a problem, though I have always thought of it as out of the ordinary. I believe that I record the essence of a message or response to follow the tone of a conversation. This includes interpretation of comprehension, attitude, compliance, aggression, and out-right-lies. It's possible to remember specific words and phrases used, but if asked to recall the conversation, I will usually retell what happened in my own words. I also remember actions and semi-related details from a conversation - location, time of day, position in a room, previous discussions, etc. Though I am unable to retell a discussion exactly word-for-word, I have a good memory for the tone and messages being given back and forth. People tell me that I have an exceptional memory, but it is rare for me to be able to quote anyone reliably, unless the specific words stand out.

 

[DesertRose]

DesertRose - I tend to remember conversations and conflicts in a way that is similar to your own. I never saw it as a problem, though I have always thought of it as out of the ordinary. I believe that I record the essence of a message or response to follow the tone of a conversation. This includes interpretation of comprehension, attitude, compliance, aggression, and out-right-lies. It's possible to remember specific words and phrases used, but if asked to recall the conversation, I will usually retell what happened in my own words. I also remember actions and semi-related details from a conversation - location, time of day, position in a room, previous discussions, etc. Though I am unable to retell a discussion exactly word-for-word, I have a good memory for the tone and messages being given back and forth. People tell me that I have an exceptional memory, but it is rare for me to be able to quote anyone reliably, unless the specific words stand out.

That's it.

 

[Autistamatic]

As a general rule - though not of course applicable to everyone - people on the spectrum are quite good at picking up and remembering details in a conversation, but which details we remember varies widely. Some will remember it word for word, others will remember the images the conversation brought to mind or what the clock looked like, what shoes the other was wearing, the cobweb in the corner of the ceiling etc...
It's common for people outside the spectrum to not notice such details but remember the emotional content of a conversation more than anything else.
It can be a cause of conflict for many of us.

 

[SusanLR]

In an argument or fight over something, I am the same way.
If I'm not the one on the defending end of it and maybe just an observer, I can remember detail
pretty well. And, yes, little things that NTs don't even notice, like the spider web or a particular item
the person is wearing, etc.
But, if I'm being screamed at over something then later think back over it, I have a difficult time
remembering word for word of what was said. And that can get me into trouble if I ask why did they say
what ever to me in such anger.
Then they can reply the didn't say that and I'm just putting a play on words which makes them even
more angry. I think it has to do with the stress of an argument or a put down.

If it is a directly stated insult that isn't true, now that, I will remember.
In fact I can't get it out of my mind.
But, remembering it in terms of tones of voice, anger, actions and attitudes I remember such.