"Male loneliness: The ticking time bomb that’s killing men"

[Kayla55]

Let's argue I was a useless waitress due to motocoord and I couldn't dance in tune or perform to be a 'typixal femsle'
Then I overhear that I'm also stupid and can't perform certain jobs. So I decided to test my job performance but it was like old theory of no women allowed.
So I'm very confused why we can't have a fair trial on abilities and then decide how stupid I am, if beta male is really better he wouldn't have to try cheat. But I suppose I got used to lying, cheating and behaviours expected from NY

 

[Jordy]

Also, personal opinion, but I think the concept of a beta male started out as blatant homophobia and it has now been retrofitted to a narcissistic personality type. It obviously means nothing, because we're not like other animals. Studies show that women prefer softer men anyway, despite what they might say.

I'm the least-macho man in the world and I've never had trouble finding romantic relationships

I would really like to see those studies. From my understanding they like altruism, man that stand up for vulnerable people but also man that are extroverted, disagreeable and low in neuroticism.

 

[Forest Cat]

Let's argue I was a useless waitress due to motocoord and I couldn't dance in tune or perform to be a 'typixal femsle'
Then I overhear that I'm also stupid and can't perform certain jobs. So I decided to test my job performance but it was like old theory of no women allowed.
So I'm very confused why we can't have a fair trial on abilities and then decide how stupid I am, if beta male is really better he wouldn't have to try cheat. But I suppose I got used to lying, cheating and behaviours expected from NY

I'm having some problems understanding what you are saying. Is there any way you can make your text more clear. For example, I don't understand what this means:

"So I'm very confused why we can't have a fair trial on abilities and then decide how stupid I am, if beta male is really better he wouldn't have to try cheat."

 

[Kayla55]

Few threads down is post 'how can I get a girlfriend's I think this is just a continue on

So in that post someone said 'People are constantly looking to improve their lives. How will you improve her life?'
This is sexist, and belief from d theory we must settle down and have kids!!

I think it's to meet someone who is compatible, who really like. Then I think it's not just lost loneliness but what I learnt is that a successful relationship takes effort. Effort to say, i made us dinner that you like! Effort to build one another up, to share dreams and wants and to bid on this together.

Sorry, beta male was misunderstood and was reference to my past relationship mistakes. Yes, it's not gender specific.

 

[Kayla55]

I'm having some problems understanding what you are saying. Is there any way you can make your text more clear. For example, I don't understand what this means:

"So I'm very confused why we can't have a fair trial on abilities and then decide how stupid I am, if beta male is really better he wouldn't have to try cheat."

Let's have history of equal education and equal job access based on abilities then when someone turns around and says you're stupid, we, then I get it.

It was hard to define myself when I was younger, I didn't social betterfly perform as regular girls do. I was pushed out of studying or jobs.
At one stage I felt like I was no good at anything, confused by gender role and bias.
It was how I felt!!

 

[Mr. Stevens]

^ You brought up some good thoughts on vulnerability with Autistics and our need for acceptance. So thank you for that.

 

[Kayla55]

That's worth criticizing, but women do the same thing. So why not discuss the behavior as something a human being can do? Why does it matter if they're male or female?

Question I pose to men reading this is simple what do you plan to do together in a relationship?
Dating a female aspies is likely to be easier social task, she probably be more accepting of rigidness or sensory. She probably not talk all time and irritate you.
I mentioned less busy places and ideas for first few dates.
Women tend to mask more, perhaps adapt to more social situations and this is why men are lonely.
So if you don't want to go out at all, do you want a girlfriend to visit for the weekend, at your place? Do what, talk of shared interests.

Is relationship? Just sex?

 

[Kayla55]

I'm having some problems understanding what you are saying. Is there any way you can make your text more clear. For example, I don't understand what this means:

"So I'm very confused why we can't have a fair trial on abilities and then decide how stupid I am, if beta male is really better he wouldn't have to try cheat."

It means often my neuro-typixal boyfriend's were really stupid, but they didn't know that.
Dating game was a disaster. I blamed it on mixed spectrum. So I decided to come see if I could shed light on issues and get fresh perspective on different breed of man.

 

[Mr. Stevens]

Question I pose to men reading this is simple what do you plan to do together in a relationship?
Dating a female aspies is likely to be easier social task, she probably be more accepting of rigidness or sensory. She probably not talk all time and irritate you.
I mentioned less busy places and ideas for first few dates.
Women tend to mask more, perhaps adapt to more social situations and this is why men are lonely.
So if you don't want to go out at all, do you want a girlfriend to visit for the weekend, at your place? Do what, talk of shared interests.

Is relationship? Just sex?

That is a great question, @Kayla55. For me, personally, I would like someone I could talk with. Somebody who is not fixated on fitting in or the fear of missing out. Someone who can laugh at society and has deeper values. I like someone who is curious, has hobbies/passions, likes learning new things, and has an interesting perspective/sense of humor. Basically, someone who has something to say, and who likes to observe.

 

[Kayla55]

I would say that living every day as if it was my last day is the most wonderful, satisfying and empowering way of living. I feel fulfilled and happy every day. And it is not because I don't have any problems or stress in my life, not because everything comes easy to me. No, it is because I know tomorrow might never come and therefore instead of worrying about the future or dwell on the past that I can't change anyway, or get angry with little things, I just enjoy today.

10 years ago I went through trauma. I don't wish anybody to go through what I had to go through that time. Nonetheless, today, I remember the worst time of my life, also as one of the most wonderful years in my life. And this is only because of my attitude to life and the determination to live every day as if it would be my last one. Sometimes, when I got up and felt really dreadful and depressed I went for a run and with a smile I said 'good morning' to every person I met. People almost always replied also with a smile, and seeing them smiling made me feel better. As a result in the most difficult for me time, I met the most amazing people, had plenty of wonderful, breathtaking adventures and learned most valuable lessons, lessons that made me a stronger, wiser and a better human being.

 

[Kayla55]

She didn’t know she’d married a man on the autism spectrum. Neither did her hubby

What happens when your soulmate does not communicate his feelings, understand social cues or play up the romance — because he has a disability? Finding out about Asperger’s syndrome was the first step in saving this couple’s marriage.

www.channelnewsasia.com

This is lonely partner story of neurodivergent relationships.....when he is on spectrum and she isnt

 

[Kayla55]

That is a great question, @Kayla55. For me, personally, I would like someone I could talk with. Somebody who is not fixated on fitting in or the fear of missing out. Someone who can laugh at society and has deeper values. I like someone who is curious, has hobbies/passions, likes learning new things, and has an interesting perspective/sense of humor. Basically, someone who has something to say, and who likes to observe.

I did notice you as a ladies man, Mr. Stevens, I sometimes wonder if you on spectrum....do you have sisters?

 

[Tony Ramirez]

Being active like me doing yoga is lifting my spirits. More than going to church, life groups which has been stressful and praying which seems to accomplish nothing good. All prayers if being in a relationship fall on deaf ears.

 

[Mr. Stevens]

I did notice you as a ladies man, Mr. Stevens, I sometimes wonder if you on spectrum....do you have sisters?

I am diagnosed, but don't have any sisters. I spent more time with my mom than my dad, as a kid, and have a really wonderful aunt who was always a good role model. So maybe that's it.

 

[Forest Cat]

I think the saying men need mother's holds true.

Sure they need mothers but lets give dads some credit also. I lost my dad when I was 16 and it was the worst thing that could have happened. I really needed him. So mothers do a great job and dads too. Dads are important.

 

[Rodafina]

Dads are important.

YES. Dads’ importance should never be forgotten and their absence can be devastating.

 

[Kayla55]

YES. Dads’ importance should never be forgotten and their absence can be devastating.

believe men and women can help one another....
So ye, mothers and fathers.

I wanted to go live off the grid, I did some research into this, maybe early retirement and then I can write those 3 books I always thought about.
Now whole thing about this is it's a survival camp, so generally dad does improvements to the camp. In my case alone, I'd have to pay someone to set up basic things. I guess being too remote isn't safe....but not overcrowded.

I share this as an adventure idea for others cause I know rent is one of biggest expenses!! Can always sell or pass on your gettaway house by selling online.

 

[Bert Lundblad]

If you want to find out what's going to happen, watch this:

A dramatic number: A fair guesstimate is that China's population will be down to 650 Million by 2050.
It's definitely best to watch the section from 05:00 to 11:00.
The bit about China is at 09:30

Note that Stephen J. Shaw is (as he self-describes) a Data Analyst.
He's not participating in the war. He should not be treated as a combatant.

for life in general declining population is good we use or rather eat up any other life here, maybe we should let it happen and as a backup we can have spermbanks father unknown when its coming to a critical point , its good for other reasons too because we dont need bloodlines anymore "my genes should win" that belongs to the animal world , the planet would recover from our misuse

 

[1ForAll]

There was an article online not too long ago from some US source that that basically said this based on some survey.

--More women now getting more degrees than men means less reliance on them as a financial provider.

--This means they can be even more selective in who they choose, and not date down to accepting what they feel they deserve.

--Women can make up for differences in loneliness from their friendships.

--Or choose to have relationships with women if they see more attraction there.

--Women also likely think based on the above there is too much risk these days with relationships with men, and having to put forth too much effort there which is harder to do if a career unless the guy was more nurturing or providing other needs she had.

-The conclusion from the article was that more men may need to adapt to combat their loneliness and depression issues. They may need to either change, put their efforts elsewhere and/or find happiness elsewhere, if women are less available.

So what does that mean? A society where more roles are reversed? One where men and women are more selfish or living apart? One where we have the two extreme groups and hardly no middle? Or something else? I just know regardless if good or bad this culture or society is changing.

 

[Tony Ramirez]

I'm Christian but I don't like service, I like when church goes out on walks or barbeque more. We must always keep faith!!

I'm even enjoying them as far apart as they are less. When I go to them I am surrounded by couples and new borns. Makes me feel more lonely. It's just that when I pray to God for a nice single woman he instead brings a new couple in my life so I don't pray to him much or at all.

That's happened at the new Thursday life group I am starting to dispise. Last month I thought I connected to a woman who needed help entering the building until she was in the life group and mentioned a husband. The following Sunday I had to meet the guy and pretend I liked him. Now he is in the lifegroup and he won't shut the hell up. He talks all the time I get a headache. That's God looking out for me. Maybe I will do some yoga at home and if my family says anything I will tell then it relaxes me and to pound sand if they don't like it.

Before you say the new couple might know someone stop there. The wife and husband only each have a brother.

Sorry for my rant that's me being negative again but I had to let you know. I keep more of it in my journal.