Just a hunch!

[Lemon Zing]

Nearly 2 months ago, I signed a lease for a flat, and I'm due to move my things in soon, once all the appliances are delivered and the carpets are put down too. In November, I met a housing officer and one other guy was with him, and they seemed too overly nice, and said they'd get me support. Once they said they knew my social worker, that was all it took. They've set up support for me as well, according to my mother, and I never agreed to this at all.

My mate agreed with me that due to my history, they might be getting used as this...

All jokes aside - I don't even really trust support workers assigned to clients from social services. Not only are a lot of the workers clueless about autism, they can grass on you (blab) very frequently, as they're kind of forcefully instructed to do this. I've never heard from my social worker for long enough, and I don't like him either, as he has ruined my acting career by not agreeing to provide male workers for to assist with my anxiety, and so I get other issues to deal with due to this, but at the same time, he is also a snake. These guys, however, work in the same building as my social worker, so I don't blame myself for thinking they're up to something. It's practically a 15 minute walk up the road as well. They know about my court related problems, which is why something smells a bit funny. If I never verified this support, why's it being set up?

If I was going to seek any means of personal support, I'd employ my own (male) helpers. There's no need to divulge information about why I cannot have women (because of infatuation risks). Although I really haven't got a clue how to acquire self-directed support, but I'd like to find out how it can be arranged. That way, if I don't like them, or if they are pompous, or I suspect they're just being used as snitches, then I can lay them off in a fair manner.

My sister is in the hospital. They've screwed up her life for years now, and they were definitely responsible for the untimely death of my other sister's ex (after they fabricated stories about him and isolated him in a quiet region in Fife, Scotland). I've not been greatly helped by these lousy support workers, to be honest. Some of them act like they "care" about one achieving their goals and all, but then they will flap their gums. You don't need that. The hassle I had with that agency that helped me for years was enough to make me say, "Never again." Trust me!

P.S. I don't mean that all these caregivers are bad, but you have to be careful who you let in.

 

[Suzanne]

Hello Paul Lee

What is the expression? Been there, done that; have the t shirt? Or something like that.

No doubt there are authentic social workers out there, but they get lost in the rubbish and oh boy, have I had dealings with the rubbish ones?

I was a very niave 21 year old when they came on the scene and sadly, I put all my trust in them and could not comprehend why they did not match up to my trust and it is only maturing in thought etc, that I have the answer.

Just a side point, regarding what you said about not hiring females. I am the same with males and wow at the grand age of 48, finally get it. Due to molestation from father, I have this thing: if a guy does not take an interest in me sexually, then I am worthless. All the stories I have heard about those in charge and taking advantage of their clients, I am afraid I have thought: I would be flattered and terribly sadly, that is how I live my life; it is like I am a slave to men. And now, why I insist on only seeing a female therapist, because I cannot cope with the constant sexual thoughts I will have, whilst with a male therapist ie does he like me? Oh no, he just sees me as any old female? What can I do to change that? I DO NOT NEED THAT. So, even if on a different level to you, Paul, I get you why you would only want to hire chaps.

I cannot cross a road when a car is coming, because if it is a man and he does not stop for me, I would feel mortified and so blasted worthless and thus, now I wait til the car or lorry or van has gone past and that saves any mental torture.

My husband told one chap. Please don't flirt with my wife, because she will respond. She does not start the flirting; she joins in and he is right.

 

[Lemon Zing]

Believe me: I wish they had my best interests at heart. I really do. But it took being betrayed and harassed by them to realize that they're (mostly) unqualified, good for nothing, low-life scumbags. Of course, not everybody who works as a caregiver is evil, but it's hard to tell who is trustworthy and who is going to prove to be a dirty rat. If I were you, I'd only turn to family for help. Yeah, I know it's a burden to do that, but I don't think these people in the NHS are good at their jobs. My sister had to wait ages for an important scan, and I hope she doesn't have cancer. She can't even walk.

The first thing that happened with my former support agency, was that I had an older lady as a key worker in 2008. She uses a wheelchair now, and has retired long ago. Anyway, an older guy came not long afterwards, so I worked with those two to start off with. He didn't really act out of line in person, but he confessed to sending me a series of abusive emails for up to 2 years, with an alias. He knew I was anxious to find my only girlfriend that I lost contact with from years ago, and so he created an email address unrelated to his one for work, and sent me a barrage of messages, initially from Gumtree. He confessed it was him. At the time, I had all these ads there about how I wanted to find her. He also sent me emails with remarks about a wrestler who passed away many years ago, and added in lots of sarcastic comments about my taste in music, and offered "recommendations" to listen to for my suicide.

When I eventually got back with my ex in 2012 (she was absent from my life since 2005), all she did was get me to pay for expensive items, repeatedly jerk me off, then have her family abuse me too. She also maintained I was just a mate of hers, while seeing this other guy.

After going through dozens of different workers, since a lot of them either had left or went elsewhere, I had to leave my supported accommodation in 2014 after being arrested over my Spanish key worker and another woman, after I became infatuated with them. This service user kept hanging out in the staff flat during sleepover hours, in 2013. Since he wasn't a resident of the flat, he was not supposed to be there. Once, we had a fight over a girl who came to the same autism facility known as 'Number 6' and I was fighting with him on Facebook, and linked him to negative stuff about me. He knew who my key worker was. So it's likely he blabbed to her. I'd also told members of message boards that I had a thing for her too, and I explained all this to a male worker I trusted. Unfortunately, he reported me. Then my key worker turned wicked by the end of that year. When we had a shift after this, she was so cold and distant - a far cry from the friendly Hispanic woman I knew. On the sleepover on Christmas Eve in 2013 for example, it was just us two. She moved her seat over to the back of the kitchen, and told me, "I need to stretch my legs!" while giving me a huge dirty look. This sort of behavior carried on until she was unceremoniously removed from my rota in February of 2014 (but I was scared to cast it up). We did some baking during our last shift, which was more like half a shift as I had slept in, and she seemed decent again. But I was totally betrayed thereafter; I didn't see her for ages, and when I saw her around, she wouldn't say a thing nice to me.

When these women asked not to work with me, their bosses kept being overly nice by asking how I was doing (which they never did in that manner) and saying they were just busy with a grin on their faces. After I figured out I was deceived, I threw tantrums. But they constantly used that as the "reason" they were removed, when this is complete lies. However, I did get to apologize to them in a room in front of the assistant manager once, but it ate away at my sanity that I lost people I really liked, and it just got to me so badly. My support shifts with other workers were no longer pleasant, so I quit my support entirely. So after a miserable 5 months, I got incredibly angry and sent them nasty emails, both before and after the cops smashed my bedroom door in to intimidate me, managers made a fool of me, and you name it. I was very racist in one of the emails. Yet after I was remanded in jail the first time in the summer of 2014, which was like a major punishment in itself, I had sent even more messages, but these were just apology type ones, which was still looked upon as a breach of bail. Then I was arrested again, and was put back in prison, and a guy in my cell assaulted me when I wanted the TV turned off. They fully committed me for trial in May of 2015 too, and sent me to a jail in Glasgow, probably 50 miles from home, saying I was a sex offender - which my lawyer later called just a "mistake." In October of 2015, I was severely beat up in a cell at the court, after telling a crazy guy I was in a protection wing. These cons usually think that's a wing for "beasts" or something. Then they opposed my bail and a guy in my cell tried to set me on fire. Luckily, I got out after like 3 days.

Once, I phoned the sleepover office when I was scared to go home and the workers I had set me up. Cops were in the room listening to where I revealed I was gonna go next, and they knew I was gonna get a 35 bus, which is now a 300 bus. A senior said I should go home. I actually got off a bus just a short distance before the intended stop, to get frozen yogurt from a chilled food bar, and they were waiting there for me, to apprehend me.

The court had me on a Community Payback Order from around May of 2015 to October of 2016. Due to several breaches, I had to see this a-hole of a supervisor for longer, until March of last year, and sometimes we had to chat with his boss, and I lost out on lots of work as a film extra, which has disheartened me, because no-one was hardly ever available to 'chum me' to the filming locations (I get chronic anxiety), and then I got slandered by people on Facebook too which I cannot prove, but I'm sure it occurred. The social worker got me a guy from Morocco who just complained about the weather, and he was so arrogant, and he also told my father not to give our neighbor eye drops, and reported him. This supervisor made me agree what websites to go on and I had to hand over my Internet enabled devices, such as my laptop and phone, and whatnot. He also tried to tag team me with my social worker by using my own care personnel that he assigned as, well...stool pigeons of course. Now I have to see him again on 23 January after not seeing him for nearly a year, for to prepare a court report concerning a different matter, relating to some English traitor from a band in Liverpool that I flamed on Twitter. Etc.

Basically, I sent this famous musician a rude tweet once, but I apologized sincerely. Then he muted my accounts. He had hits as part of a group called The Mighty Wah! in the 80's (mainly known for a UK number 3 hit entitled "The Story of the Blues" in 1983). Eventually, I figured that out and when I messaged him, he told me to pee off, saying I abused him when he did me no wrong. Recently, I sent him £100 through PayPal as compensation for us fallen out, and I sent him a lengthy email about my anxiety, and said Liverpool music is forever, and called him "my friend." He kept my cash, but he still had me arrested, which is highly insulting. The thing is, I loved this guy's music for years. He got the police to arrest me the other week there, and I decked a police chief who was waiting outside my parents' house, due to being tired, so I have stalking charges and an assault charge against a copper. After that, this guy was highly rude to me in the cop car, and he said he didn't care about my OCD.

What a tosser. My mate cannot stand them either. They've hassled him in the past as well, because someone told them we always hang out, like to play pool, and they were contacting him once after one of the women made a childish allegation, hoping maybe he'd spill the beans, but he was told to keep quiet about that. I'm supposed to have seen her in the street and called her a traitor. She then contacted the cops, just over that. They detained me once back in 2016 to ask me questions, but there wasn't any witnesses, and I walked. I've been harassed by the police more than 20 or 30 times over the past 5 years, but sadly, you cannot take out a restraining order against the pigs. My mate thinks they are just picking on me, but I laugh when he labels them as "The Wankers Association" (as it's true enough). My sister was also raped by her ex, and they accused her of making it up.