Hi everyone. (English isn't my first language, so I apologize for any bad grammar or typos)
First of all I would like to point out that I know every person is different. Yes, I am going to ask a question here because of a specific person, but I know the answers I (hopefully) get won't necessarily tell me anything about her. I just really need some advice. I am an NT woman and the woman I'm referring to is on the spectrum.
I met a beautiful woman earlier this summer. We developed mutual feelings for each other and spent some time together that we both enjoyed. This was something we expressed to each other as well. Unfortunately she became very sick earlier this year, before we got to know each other. Now she has told me that we can't continue what we have started, cause she needs to recover and she doesn't have the strength to both maintain a relationship and getting better from her illness. She insisted that this had nothing to do with me and wished for me a happy life and hoped I would meet someone fantastic.
Thing is, I already met a fantastic person in her and I don't really feel like moving on. That said, I totally respect what she is saying about needing time to focus on getting well and not on a relationship. I will certainly not force a romantic relationship on her.
Anyways, I can picture her mind being made up because it's logical. She is sick, she will only "hold me back" by continuing a relationship where she won't be able to give me what you are supposed to be able to in a "typical" relationship, like seeing each other, worrying about each other, keeping in touch every day... For me, being a person more driven by emotions than logic, I see all this and at the same time I think what we potentially have is way to amazing to let go of. As far as I see it, there is no need to "cut me loose". My life became so much better with her in it. Having these feelings for her makes it unproblematic for me to give her space and time, but also say - hey, let's not end this. I mean, the problem here is that she is sick, that doesn't change the way I feel about her. I guess it's logical to tell me to look for someone else, but for me it feels totally wrong.
My question is - arguing with logic, with arguments based on feelings, is it even worth a try?
First of all I would like to point out that I know every person is different. Yes, I am going to ask a question here because of a specific person, but I know the answers I (hopefully) get won't necessarily tell me anything about her. I just really need some advice. I am an NT woman and the woman I'm referring to is on the spectrum.
I met a beautiful woman earlier this summer. We developed mutual feelings for each other and spent some time together that we both enjoyed. This was something we expressed to each other as well. Unfortunately she became very sick earlier this year, before we got to know each other. Now she has told me that we can't continue what we have started, cause she needs to recover and she doesn't have the strength to both maintain a relationship and getting better from her illness. She insisted that this had nothing to do with me and wished for me a happy life and hoped I would meet someone fantastic.
Thing is, I already met a fantastic person in her and I don't really feel like moving on. That said, I totally respect what she is saying about needing time to focus on getting well and not on a relationship. I will certainly not force a romantic relationship on her.
Anyways, I can picture her mind being made up because it's logical. She is sick, she will only "hold me back" by continuing a relationship where she won't be able to give me what you are supposed to be able to in a "typical" relationship, like seeing each other, worrying about each other, keeping in touch every day... For me, being a person more driven by emotions than logic, I see all this and at the same time I think what we potentially have is way to amazing to let go of. As far as I see it, there is no need to "cut me loose". My life became so much better with her in it. Having these feelings for her makes it unproblematic for me to give her space and time, but also say - hey, let's not end this. I mean, the problem here is that she is sick, that doesn't change the way I feel about her. I guess it's logical to tell me to look for someone else, but for me it feels totally wrong.
My question is - arguing with logic, with arguments based on feelings, is it even worth a try?
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