I feel lonely?

[Annaa]

I feel so just lonely, I feel like im unable to connect with people the same way that everyone else does. I don't have someone I could call a best friend, and I don't have someone i can just text. I don't have people I'd like to be around for a long while in general. I feel like socialising and just being is so much easier to everyone, than to me it's like a constant chore. Like a stupid test and I'm gambling whether I get it right or wrong.
I'm so sick of it I wish I was normal.

 

[monkeyclogs]

your feelings are always valid.

you mentioned class so i'm going to assume you're still at school. apologies if thats a wrong assumption.

This seems like two different but related problems to me

1. These particular girls

If you are feeling uncomfortable then trust your gut. Whilst their behaviour may not be deliberate it doesn't sound like you are enjoying their company and they are not demonstrating much empathy towards you. This is understandably causing a feeling of emotional insecurity on your part which is a normal reaction. you can choose to take yourself out of that situation.

2. the feelings of being different and alone

This is really really common in people with neurodivergence. If you are at school it might be worth a visit to the school councellor to see if they can help you find people who get you a bit better. There may be another girl somewhere in the school looking for someone just like you or the councellor might have information on local groups you could attend where you could meet people more attuned to who you are.

And I'll repeat the first bit of my response again...

your feelings are always valid.

 

[cooljethro]

Your age of 17 is very young and being autistic at that age in my experience is harder than what comes later, in some respects at least. You don't have the life experience yet to accept certain things or workaround them, perhaps?

Hang in there, in any case. Things often do get better in various ways.

Just know that you are not at fault for any of these issues - you are autistic and it is sadly normal for people to leave you isolated and wanting more human connection.

 

[lunarious]

Edited

I feel so just lonely, I feel like im unable to connect with people the same way that everyone else does. I don't have someone I could call a best friend, and I don't have someone i can just text. I don't have people I'd like to be around for a long while in general. I feel like socialising and just being is so much easier to everyone, than to me it's like a constant chore. Like a stupid test and I'm gambling whether I get it right or wrong.
I'm so sick of it I wish I was normal.

If you had a spell a formula to make certain feelings as loneliness disappear, and you made loneliness disappear you might regret being "happy". Because people are sheep...

The good side of Loneliness you are becoming worth something. Because happy people are sedated / drugged on Life. Find hobbies. Learn a word every second day.

I find myself repeatedly say on AF: Loneliness is better than bad company. But we want good company. ... So loneliness can be good compared to the alternative.

Your age of 17 is very young and being autistic at that age in my experience is harder than what comes later, in some respects at least. You don't have the life experience yet to accept certain things or workaround them, perhaps?

Life experience is non-sense. ASD and i'm ASD 1 are intellectual and in good company, we want the Hereafter with a Garden of bliss, where everyone walks in shackles except Us. In The Hereafter.