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Hurrah! I discovered something!

Suzanne

Suzanne

Well-Known Member
V.I.P Member
Why are some females hot and cold? They are nice to me one moment and the next, ignoring me? I have asked quite a few nts and no one said what seem to me, to be real and then, suddenly, yesterday, I found the answer.

When this female has no choice but be nice to me, she is nice; but when she has that choice, she treats me very lukewarm; or just plain acting as though I am not there. Conculsion, she does not like me and that is ok. I have said I rather she told me she did not like me, than all these rubbish and I can move on.

I guess she doesn't like me, because having aspergers, does make me seem weird.
 
Does she treat you different when other people are around? Some people "play up" when they have an audience. My mum does it a lot. Whenever she has friends over and I'm in the room - I end up the butt of a lot of her jokes.

Ed
 
I guess the term two-face comes into my brain. If they need you, they have charm. When they no longer need you, then the true personality comes out. So l don't think it's necessarily just you. It's a mask for NT people, social * niceness*. I masked being nice to get through a process of getting a bid on a home repair job and l went to bed in tears. Because the other person was not there for that. People are frustrating, but it's not always your fault.
 
I know about what you mean by wishing people would just tell you straight out how they feel about you (I actually do that quite often. I literally say "I'm really enjoying this conversation" or "I like you" out of the blue). I have had one person tell me straight out that he used to dislike me, and he is diagnosed on the spectrum. I also know about another guy who I suspected didn't like me (though he acted normal around me) and then had confirmation from a friend of mine who knows him that he really disliked me. Same with a girl who acted nice around me but secretly couldn't stand me. I don't really mind when people don't like me, but it would be simpler if they just let me know.
 
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