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How Many Friends?

How many close friends would be ideal for you?

  • Total voters
    43
Beguiling Orbit

Beguiling Orbit

Neurotribe Champion
V.I.P Member
How many close friends do you currently have and, ideally, how many close friends would you want to have and think you could handle?

I dont want to color this discussion with my answers or opinion, so I will let someone else begin. I will answer and vote later.

(Update: Edited to read "close" friends.)
 
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I've heard it said that all humans are extremely luck if they can count their true blue friends on one hand.

At the present,I have three that are still alive and two that left my circle thru their departing this world.
 
I think 3-5 close friends because I like the idea of backups. While 1-2 is ideal in someways, it means if something should happen to even one friend it's going to get to be really lonely. So, I wish of my 4 friends(I don't include acquaintances, these are people I speak to regularly) that I felt really close to them all. But two are women and I have trouble relating to women for some reason so the two guys are my truly tell anything to friends. One of those guys is my bf, the other just an odd guy I have known for years who has an even harder time making friends than I do. Really am lucky to have so many friends. It wasn't easy to find them. Took decades.
 
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I am amazed that at the grand age of close to 48, that I have actually got a few friends now.

To me, a friend is, someone I can be myself around and talk freely. I know at least 4 females now that I can be this way and it is really lovely feeling to be accepted.

I do not have to wait til they get it contact with me now, because I am not sure and confident that I freely contact them first.

One, I probably will never meet, as she is from America and I am not. But we text every day and she is an aspie too; well like me: unofficial and we are both of the same faith.

I am happy to have just one friend and if all those ladies were in the same room as me, I think it would completely overwhelm me.
 
1 and 1.

I am desperately trying to get rid of some friends from parts of my life that are no longer important, like parents of my child's friend from nursery or people that I used to work with in a completely different industry that I won't be going back to. They are really lovely people and I can't bring myself to be nasty to them, I can't even think about being nasty to them, they don't deserve that. But I also can't take the pressure of socializing and the effort it will take and we have nothing in common anymore! So I'm just going to be very busy for a few years and hope the situation sorts itself out...
 
I realize that this may sound horrible, but I don't currently feel like I have any friends, except my husband. I can think of one person who I have kept in touch with from where we used to live, but she has let me down too many times. I disclosed to her about my suspicions about ASD and she was supportive, but I would hardly ever see her, and I would always have to be the one to initiate any contact. It's still the same. I texted her to arrange a phone call for a good time when she would be home, and she said "tomorrow evening will work" with lots of hearts, emoticons, etc. Then, I called the next night, and no answer, so I texted her and asked "maybe another time?" The question mark was supposed to indicate that the ball is in her court, and this was last week, but I haven't heard a reply in any way since. This happens from time to time, but we don't even talk more often than several months in between. So, I don't feel like I can call her a friend.

I have great difficulties making friends, especially since the move, and finding people who are not fair-weather friends like so many from where we used to live. I don't like cliques, and feel uncomfortable with people who talk about other people. I really hate gossip, and find that if I am hearing others speak about others for no reason except entertainment, then I figure they will also talk about me. Why wouldn't they? Not that there's anything to talk about, because I don't tell them much.

Besides my husband, who can't really be everything I need, I don't believe I have any friends of the type that I need, especially right now. I muddle through every kind of social contact I'm exposed currently, and spend most of my time as a lone wolf. Doc appointment or the grocery store are necessary, so I communicate what I need to in those instances. But right now, I don't want to meet new people, except here.

Otherwise, 2-5 would be sufficient, probably the most I've ever had at once, and not all at the same time (as someone else has already said).
 
Besides the dog..... who is awesome.... I have one best friend, the rest of my acquaintances are fair weather friends.
 
InPrincipio said:
I realize that this may sound horrible, but I don't currently feel like I have any friends, except my husband.

I have great difficulties making friends, especially since the move, and finding people who are not fair-weather friends like so many from where we used to live. I don't like cliques, and feel uncomfortable with people who talk about other people. I really hate gossip, and find that if I am hearing others speak about others for no reason except entertainment, then I figure they will also talk about me. Why wouldn't they? Not that there's anything to talk about, because I don't tell them much.

Besides my husband, who can't really be everything I need, I don't believe I have any friends of the type that I need, especially right now. I muddle through every kind of social contact I'm exposed currently, and spend most of my time as a lone wolf. Doc appointment or the grocery store are necessary, so I communicate what I need to in those instances. But right now, I don't want to meet new people, except here.
Click to expand...

Similar situation for me. I have only my husband and seem unable to make and keep friends. I had online friends for a while but many moved on in different directions. My best friend of 3 years who I had met in person only twice disappeared for almost a year after his gf broke up with him. When he resurfaced and contacted me again I was a different person, having met my husband (then my bf), moved in with bf, new job. I was in a completely different place and so was he. We kinda weren't able to reconnect as friends like we were before and when we did it almost seemed like he connected with my husband more so I felt my husband stole my friend, even though it wasn't exactly that way.

In any case, other than my husband I've got no one.
 
Aristotle says we are lucky to have about 2 truly good friends in a complete lifetime. That puts it into perspective.

I would say I have had good friends-----maybe more than two! And I have wanted to be friends with some who did not want me to be their friends and others who wanted to connect when I could not.

Now I try to be kind and nice but do not "hang out". I don't go to groups or studies. I stay away.

I do find A LOT of social support here! :)
 
I consider my wife a close friend. And I have three other friends I am close to, that I can see often. And one other friend who is almost family to me, but he lives far away, so we don't talk much.

That is about right for me. I would like to have more friends around sometimes, but it doesn't come easily. And I can get overwhelmed by too many.
 
I have 2 active friends and 1 haven't talked to in a while. I think it's because he won't play games with me on steam
 
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InPrincipio said:
Maybe I need a dog. (no rush though)
Click to expand...

(I know I'm quoting my own quote, but... ) I really do believe animals can be friends (sometimes of the truest kind!), but that said, I'm about as selective of them in that way as I am with people.

I've had some good pets and some bad ones. One dog was so bad we sent him back to the breeder before he turned one year old (already 4 years ago now). I still miss the first family dog I ever knew from the first 12 years of my life. She (a black lab) was the best and I could count on her always. And I had a white german shepherd that I loved, but he became my husband's dog - he was still a pup when he shifted his affections over to my husband after we met, so it wasn't the same.

We haven't been able to find the time to dedicate to a dog (I'm allergic to cats), but now that I'm off work... I will see how long, but you never know... I really have been thinking about it. Maybe a rescue? :)
 
i have only one at a time, my primary and best friend. however, its easily possible to have another one, but isn't a primary friend, because its only open to one person. i think i can handle at least three.
 
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