How do i learn how to read body language?

[An Arctic fox]

I want to be able to have friends since i don't got any of those and the first step (after admitting my errors) is to learn body language but idk how. i tried looking it up on the internet but i got stressed out and ended up panicking and closing the tab. so how should i learn to read body language (and i may need to learn to socialize)?

 

[Bolletje]

Practice, practice, practice.

 

[An Arctic fox]

Practice, practice, practice.

is it worth it?

 

[FreeDiver]

is it worth it?

Here's the problem. You can't do it from an intuition standpoint. That's how NT's do it and how they can do it so naturally. For us, the only way we can do it is to do it cognitively. Which means you have to actively think about what you're doing. i.e mentally entering into a theatrical mode. The down side of doing this is that it but your brain under a full load(like the CPU in your mind is running at 100% all the time). Practice can help you get better at it but you will never be as good as an NT.

 

[Bolletje]

is it worth it?

In my opinion, yes. Just mingling with people is a great way to practice, as stressful as it may be.

 

[An Arctic fox]

Heres

(I assume thats like here here and means agreement with said statement). I dont want to put effort into something i dont really want to learn unless it is worth the effort

 

[An Arctic fox]

In my opinion, yes.

Ok (Can i have an example)

 

[NothingToSeeHere]

Practice, practice, practice.

Yep.

The book "How to make friends and influence people" might be a good resource for you.

 

[Cazelle]

Do you have anyone who knows you that you can talk to about this and ask? Maybe watch a movie or TV programme on silent and look at the body language used and try to guess what each character is expressing and feeling. If you do this alongside someone who is good with body language, maybe they can explain what they are seeing and noticing.

 

[An Arctic fox]

is there any online courses on it or something easy to do or like classes? (I am reading to many books)

 

[An Arctic fox]

Do you have anyone who knows you that you can talk to about this and ask? Maybe watch a movie or TV programme on silent and look at the body language used and try to guess what each character is expressing and feeling. If you do this alongside someone who is good with body language, maybe they can explain what they are seeing and noticing.

the only person i trust enough to do that with would probably be bored and i dont want to be a bother but i could try

 

[Gracey]

I want to be able to have friends since i don't got any of those and the first step (after admitting my errors) is to learn body language but idk how. i tried looking it up on the internet but i got stressed out and ended up panicking and closing the tab. so how should i learn to read body language (and i may need to learn to socialize)?

that's a huge question.
many, many different parts to it.

I believe to socialise effectively would require an understanding of a particular groups hierarchy, customs, and purpose.

By particular group I mean the various levels of sociability expected by different 'groups' of people.

(family, relatives, familiar faces/family friends and visitors, academia, peers, support groups, interest groups, religious groups and so on)

off the top of my head I can only think of a few traits that might be acceptable to all of the 'groups' I've mentioned above.

manners (politeness) affability and humour.
(the list will likely be much longer )



Learning body language is effective if it's to understand someone else however;
and depending on how intensely you want to get into the subject,
a great part of it concerns the facial muscles.
reading someones face
(in addition to the rest of the body)

if you were thinking of trying to disguise your own body language you have a monumental task ahead of you

Are there particular reasons why you can't just be yourself; to attract those most like you?
rather than try to bend yourself all out of shape learning to be something you're not?

 

[An Arctic fox]

I can attract some like me and others who are nice and stuff but i dont keep them, the ones who are like me are better friends and stay longer though but id like to be able to work maybe and social skills are important in that and stuff and things and i dont know i might need to diguise my body language but id at least like to understand people

 

[LucyPurrs]

Aspergers from the Inside has a video on body language- suggest you check it out:

 

[An Arctic fox]

Yeah good video (thanks for the video). I should be able to read it though and do what I'm supposed to

 

[clg114]

All that body language goes right over my head. That is why I have a tendency to take things literally. The one thing that I try to do is make eye contact with people that I am having a conversation with. I have found that if you do not make eye contact, they tend to think that you are not listening to them. But I have to think about it, to do it. I always make eye contact with my customers, just so they know that I am listening when they are telling me what they want from me.

 

[An Arctic fox]

All that body language goes right over my head. That is why I have a tendency to take things literally. The one thing that I try to do is make eye contact with people that I am having a conversation with. I have found that if you do not make eye contact, they tend to think that you are not listening to them. But I have to think about it, to do it. I always make eye contact with my customers, just so they know that I am listening when they are telling me what they want from me.

Yeah it goes over my head to but I feel I'm supposed to know it so I should try but is rather not. And with eye contact I dont think I make it but I dont know

 

[clg114]

Yeah it goes over my head to but I feel I'm supposed to know it so I should try but is rather not. And with eye contact I dont think I make it but I dont know

The only bit of body language that I care about is eye contact, for the reason that I explained. The rest does not matter to me. There are advantages in being a grumpy old man.

 

[An Arctic fox]

The only bit of body language that I care about is eye contact, for the reason that I explained. The rest does not matter to me. There are advantages in being a grumpy old man.

True

 

[Progster]

Reading body language and facial expression has never been my strong point and I've been told that I don't pick up on people's mood. I tend to pick up more from intonation than body language. There are good books and tutorials out there concerning body language, if you research it you will surely find something useful, and then just spend some time people watching and try to make out the emotional clues in people's body language.