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hi i'm new and i have a question :-)

Discussion in 'Introduce Yourself' started by marzi, Dec 11, 2019.

  1. marzi

    marzi New Member

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    hi i'm new and waiting for a diagnosis, but pretty sure it will include aspergers. Scared as hell though. My name is marzi.
    Is it normal to not be able to make eye contact with specific people? I have to constantly lower my eyes when they lock with my psy : he's a man and i'm a woman, but i dont think that is the reason. He has dark brown eyes and glasses and it just feels wierd and scary. Maybe it's because he gets me to talk about private stuff and I feel embarassed.
    Otherwise, i can manage pretty good eye contact with most people, by concentrating on the bridge of the nose or something, but with this guy, i just fail.
    wonder if that happens to others :)
     
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  2. rubicks52

    rubicks52 Active Member

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    Hello! I know that for me, maintaining eye contact gets harder the longer a conversation is. It's why I find extended one-on-one interactions (like a meal) kind of awkward and tiring because there's not multiple people to look between.
     
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  3. NothingToSeeHere

    NothingToSeeHere Asexuowl V.I.P Member

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    I definitely find making eye contact more difficult with some people than others. If I find a person annoying eye contact with them will make the annoyance worse. I also find making eye contact uncomfortable when I am feeling vulnerable and awkward, which is always the case for me when talking to a psychologist or therapist. Also I forget to make eye contact when thinking deeply of having a long conversation which also tends to happen with psychologists.
     
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  4. Tom

    Tom Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    rdb7k76boo121.jpg

    Is this the guy? The solution is easy. Change shrinks to one of these:

    a.jpeg
    Or if that is too much trouble, you can just smack the back of his head until the glasses and eyes pop out.

    :)
     
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  5. Nitro

    Nitro Admin/Immoral Turpitude Staff Member Admin V.I.P Member

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    Hi marzi

    welcome to af.png
     
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  6. tree

    tree Blue/Green Staff Member V.I.P Member

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    upload_2019-12-11_17-22-33.png
     
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  7. Isadoorian

    Isadoorian Well Known Chat Member, Welcomer of Newcomers V.I.P Member

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    Welcome to the Forums! I hope you make new friends and enjoy your stay in the process! :)
     
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  8. Nervous Rex

    Nervous Rex High-functioning autistic V.I.P Member

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    Welcome. I hope whatever answer you get from the diagnosis process is a relief for you. I hope you find this forum as friendly and useful as I have.
     
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  9. Aspychata

    Aspychata My Art Work

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    This place has really help me feel normal. Hope you find it useful. The eye contact, l can completely ignore faces. I understand what you are saying.
     
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  10. Aspychata

    Aspychata My Art Work

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  11. SolarPoweredNightOwl

    SolarPoweredNightOwl Walking contradiction

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    Welcome to the forums, and good luck with the diagnosis. I have trouble with the eye contact thing, too, it's dangerous, and harder with some than others.
     
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  12. Sarah S

    Sarah S Well-Known Member

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    Hello and warm wellcome to the forum Marzi.

    I have never been able to look anyone straight in the eyes and never will.
     
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  13. clg114

    clg114 Still crazy, after all these years. Staff Member V.I.P Member

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    Welcome to Autism Forums!
     
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  14. marzi

    marzi New Member

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    Dear Everybody that has replied or read my message. You have really helped me a lot. It's a real boost to know that you are there. I hope I can help others in turn. :)
     
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  15. marzi

    marzi New Member

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    Final tests today .... Friday the 13th:eek:
     
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  16. Sarah S

    Sarah S Well-Known Member

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    Good luck. And above all regardles of what this test says

    Nothing have changed. Youre still exatly the same as you were before this possible diagnose . all this is is a document which will be a way for you to be able to understand why you might having this or that problems and others close around you to be able to understand why as well. And for the docs to be able to help you if needed to get the help you need. Thats all :)
     
  17. marzi

    marzi New Member

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    YEAH that's him to a T
     
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  18. Varzar

    Varzar Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    Welcome Marzi!

    And, yeah. That sounds totally normal to me. I can't look people in the eyes for more than a few seconds without great discomfort.

    Also, don't think there's anything to be scared about. For me, the revelation of Asperger's has only been helpful in my relationships and in understanding my past. It's been more like a relief than anything to finally have an explanation for so many things that never made sense before.
     
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  19. Schism

    Schism Member

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    Hi Marzi. Welcome to the Forums.
    How did it go then? Like other people said, a diagnosis is nothing to be scared of, in fact, consider it a relief. You'll get an answer, whichever way it goes... Better to know thyself etc.
    I've been waiting 3+ years now & got my appointment for next year a few days ago. I am terrified either way it goes too. Be better for a Yes for me, would explain an awful lot in my life.

    As for eye contact, some easier than others, defo depends on the vibe I get from someone. But I learnt a long time ago to emulate eye contact. . I look at the eyebrow & move around the face. As I am short - sighted anyway, far enough away, all I see is a pink blob with a moving blur for a mouth. Still makes me uncomfortable even though that's all I see. I just know (feel) they're eyeballing me lmao.

    I am so glad I found this forum ☺
     
  20. Crossbreed

    Crossbreed Neur-D Missionary ☝

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    ...And potatoes have way more "eyes" than people do...! ;)