Greeting Anxiety in Crowds, Venues small and large Difficulty Scale

[Tony Ramirez]

This is a scale that me and my therapist created a while ago. I modified it a bit as things happened but this is what I experience when I went to Chuch, parties, out and about.
0 – Do not attend.
1 – Sneak out.
2 – A guy I already know says Hi to me.
3 – I approach a guy I do know for a conversation.
4 – A guy I already know approaches me for a longer conversation.
5 – A married couple I don't know approaches me for a conversation. Happens often. 50/100 odds.
6 – I approach a woman I do know for a conversation.
7 – A guy I don't know approaches me for a conversation. Happens often. 60/100 odds.
8 – A woman approaches me, and we exchange "Hi's." Happened once.

The last two never happened.
9 – A woman possibly single I do not know around my age or younger approaches me or while sitting next starts a conversation. 1/100 odds. IR.
10 – I approach a woman possibly single I do not know around my age or younger for a conversation.

By the way I know girls from Church but I "only" meet them in small life groups where social interaction is harder to avoid.

If it was in Church or big social gatherings my odds drop to 1/100 number 9 unless married couples then 50/100 number 5. Matter of fact meet most couples in bigger events so number 5 is easier and common.

Thanks to medication number 6 is easier. Matter of fact during a group I asked a girl I know if we can exchange WhatsApp chat. Number 7 is harder because it's more annoying and happens quite often even when sitting next to girls I don't know.

Thanks to the pandemic I never attempted number 10 possibly metting an Aspie girl with possible worse odds than 1/100 as I have not meet any Aspies at Church but as misery is all Church events were canceled.

 

[Aspychata]

Think if you just start talking to anybody , you get way better at this. At the store, say hi to the cashier. Ask them how their day is going. It gets easier. People sometimes are as shy as you. We forget this.

 

[Misery]

Hey, at least you're making some sort of effort, right?

I rate a 0 on the scale for basically everything, myself. I think a 1 is as far as I've ever gone.

 

[Tony Ramirez]

I do make an effort and very few Church functions only two this summer I went too were almost all couples. Otherwise I pretty much go to most of them that apply to me excluding ones like parents event, dads courses, financial courses that don't apply to me.

I am just so angry about this pandemic I was going to try 10 at Church or Church event but now with the antisocial pandemic and Church and events closed its a lost cause.

 

[Tony Ramirez]

Also really thinking about it number 9 may have happened twice but one may have been number 5 as the woman who I sat next to spoke to me I think was married.

Also at a gathering several people at an event last year on a Saturday many girls there were married but one single girl around my age well she is 2 years younger than me did come up to me and speak to me. She liked talking about my grandmother that I mentioned at the group last week. Of course I was not brave then on Ziprasidone which did nothing unlike now on Seroquel I would have asked her to exchange numbers. Well I would have said I would like to text you some time.

Of course I think of the two disasters more a girl next to me said nothing not to me or anyone during the greetings and I was petrified to say anything to her. Then the second time when a girl sat next to me but number 7 happened the guy in front of me talked to me.