I very much feel this way, but from a male perspective. In youth I was horrible at talking with the other sex, I would stutter and stammer and couldn't recognize the difference. I always sought out friendship first, but was admonished so many times that I wanted to be "friends" first, like it was a bad thing, that only confused me more and I locked up in hesitation, probably making myself that much more awkward. I did learn the flirting and reading body language, but I still struggle to identify the difference from a fun flirty friend or a potential girlfriend? It confuses me a lot, and I've lost a lot of potentials due to my awkwardness and inability to either read right or express appropriately. I wish I knew the right answer. I'm a fun flirty kind of person, I enjoy making others smile, but then it gets complicated. Was it a compliment and that's all? Was she just making small talk? Did she misinterpret my kindness for flirting? Should I just stay in my shell and remain quiet? I like being myself, a man, and in my world a man should make the first move. I don't know if I'm dated or out of date, but I still struggle with this. I was married for nearly 18 years, she passed last year from cancer. She knew all of me and we had fairly good communication as she knew how to interpret my communication or lack their in. After 20 years of being off the market, I don't know how to be any other way. It's very hard to be honest and upfront when so many run away, either running away in terror or humor. I always feel like I'm walking a razors edge, with feet bleeding trying not to fall into either side of failure. Communication is hard work! More so for Aspies. I figure I have to keep trying or I'll never meet anyone, and I try to hide myself until I feel safe enough to let some of myself be known. I can hide or play any roll that can be played, just not the character that is "me". When the right one comes along she will be patient, understanding and kind. Until then I will keep being friendly, regardless of how people interpret it. Good luck with your growth, relationships, and communications!