Eye-contact

[Matthias]

Interesting. Do you think neurotypicals could eradicate autism by being more interesting?

We're all the same. "Neurotypicals" also avoid eye contract when they're not interested in what someone is saying or when they are having anxiety.

 

[Fino]

If we're all the same, then what the heck is a "diagnosis"?

 

[Ylva]

Not to mention that if we're all the same, what did your made up classic autist "recover" from?

 

[Fino]

I saw his other thread immediately after this one so I understand now. I always get a little confuzzled when people say things that just aren't true because I don't like to assume someone is just wrong, it makes me feel bad.

 

[Mush]

Eye contact makes me physically sick. It’s like there’s a large metal rod trying to push its way out of my abdomen if I look into someone’s eyes for more than about a tenth of a second. I have tried and tried over the years to rectify this, but it just doesn’t go away.

I generally look about at people’s mouths when making conversation. Seeing their lips helps me to understand and focus on what they say.

When my son was younger he would grab my head and look straight into my eyes to talk to me. It was so uncomfortable, but I would force myself through it because he needed me to look at him.

Afterwards I would sometimes cry in the shower because I felt like such a horrible father and I didn’t know why I couldn’t stand to look at his eyes. It was a most distressing time, but it passed once he got a bit older.

 

[Ylva]

It's okay. If you associate eye contact with something awful, that's not your fault. Eyes have a lot of cultural meaning in neurotypical culture, but they're still just eyes.

 

[Mush]

I struggle to look my dog in the eye. The cat not so much, as cats have no soul.

 

[Matthias]

Eye contact makes me physically sick. It’s like there’s a large metal rod trying to push its way out of my abdomen if I look into someone’s eyes for more than about a tenth of a second. I have tried and tried over the years to rectify this, but it just doesn’t go away...

Do you look at eyes when you watch TV? Do you get the same reaction?

 

[Aspychata]

If l really hate someone, or my gut tells me they are rotten, l hate looking at their eyes. And this is a very pronounced trait. I don't like in the eyes because a lot of times l am calculating if you are a complete jerk. And l am watching the eyes, the hands, the posture to judge this. People betray themselves with their body language. This is what my abusive marriage did to me.

 

[Tesseract]

TLDR

"...maintaining eye contact while also searching for an answer is too demanding on the brain.
Looking away is a motivated response that enables one to better process information."

Maintaining Eye Contact While Talking Overwhelms the Brain

Entire article is only six paragraphs long.

At the end of the article it states:

So, if a cutie is asking you where you’re at but you’re looking everywhere but their eyes, it’s likely happening because your brain is too consumed by grappling with the intensity of the moment at hand. But in that case, remember that it’s in your best interest to meet their gaze: Other research has shown that maintaining eye contact is one of the best ways to snag a mate.

If any of us is caught staring at a cutie's cleavage, we can always tell her, "I can't help it, I have autism, and scientific research backs me up on this".