Egyptian cleric Abu Islam: Christianity emerged from penis worship and...

[Quart]

...Christian women raise dogs to replace their husbands:

I have to say that the men of MEMRI are heroes. Thank you so much for keeping us laughing along.

 

[Soup]

@ Quart: That was one of the funniest things I've seen in a very long time! Uhhh... how does that apply to a married female Athiest who is raising a spayed female pug? Am I expressing a subconscious desire to enter into lesbian flagrante delicto with a short fat hairy, wrinkled woman with Thyroid issues & a hideous facial deformity? WOW: I'm crazier than I thought. It's a good thing I gained insight from this video: now I know what to bring up next time I find myself at the shrink!

 

[Quart]

@ Quart: That was one of the funniest things I've seen in a very long time! Uhhh... how does that apply to a married female Athiest who is raising a spayed female pug? Am I expressing a subconscious desire to enter into lesbian flagrante delicto with a short fat hairy, wrinkled woman with Thyroid issues & a hideous facial deformity? WOW: I'm crazier than I thought. It's a good thing I gained insight from this video: now I know what to bring up next time I find myself at the shrink!

Oh, I'm telling you now: the Yusuf al-Qaradawi one (about female masturbation) will have you screaming the house down in laughter. And this chap was f?ted by the then Mayor of London, no less!

 

[Quart]

Here you go.

Yusuf al-Qaradawi is probably the most influential person in mainstream Islam today. He is the spiritual leader of the Muslim Brotherhood, and has a hell of a lot of clout, both in the Arab world and amongst many Muslims in Britain and the U.S.

Here is this esteemed gentleman's studied position on female masturbation.

 

[Soup]

HAHAHAHAHA!!! Thanks again, Quart: that was a hoot! (gotta go stitch my sides back up) Our holy guy here has, however, missed some of the life-endangering hazards of male masturbation. Perhaps he was too busy watching Euro porn purely for research purposes. (Soup glues on a ratty fake beard & a tinfoil holy dude hat for added legitimacy).

Male masturbation can be equally hazardous (I swear to god) & can endanger both the life and limb of a man. Persistent engagement in forbidden activities will surely result in Carpal tunnel syndrome, Tennis Elbow & Carpet Burn of the Palm so severe that he will be unable to be gainfully employed. Thus, the threat of STARVATION will descend upon him, forcing him to STEAL his daily falafel. Having but one functioning hand, he will surely be apprehended & suffer the punishment that has been decreed in the holy scriptures for such a terrible crime: HIS FUNCTIONING HAND SHALL BE AMPUTATED (GOD IS GREAT!). Having lost his hand and not being able to...service himself with the damaged one, he shall experience extreme frustration (the holy book says: 'YEA..of the one cripple-handed masturbating amputee: his balls shall be bluer than the Nile!'). Due to his overwhelming appetites, he shall attempt to commit RAPE (I swear it is the truth!) upon the masturbating virgin temptress of ill repute with the torn hymen and her brothers, fearing further scandal shall set upon him and KILL HIM!

So young men: to avoid such a fearsome fate, do your homework, keep busy and volunteer (but not at the same place as that frisky virgin!)

 

[Geordie]

I believe such comments serve to provoke more than inform. Indeed, do the homework, and think really carefully...

 

[Spinning Compass]

I have also heard that too much self-stimulation of a certain manly part can leave it raw and sore. Personally I wouldn't know not having that particular part. But Penis Worship? Well, from MY point of view, if it's true, Christianity doesn't have a monopoly on it. The other two members (no pun intended) of the Abrahamic faith are just as guilty of idolizing the almighty phallus, the way all three treat possession of it as a passport to certain privileges denied those of us who lack it. At least the Hindus are open about their worship.

 

[Divrom]

Idiotic.

I'm not a Christian, but was a pastor for 9 years and this is academically shameful.

If the cleric had read his Koran properly, he might learn to be more respectful to his Christian 'brothers'.