Don't you wish you had Someone to talk to about your autism with?

[ancusmitis]

I'm surprised there aren't more of you with an ASD family member.

Oh, scads of family members, trust me, but none of them are diagnosed, and they certainly didn't know about it as children

 

[On the Inside]

Am I in the minority having an obvious ASD family line?

I have obvious family members who likely had ASD, an older cousin most likely, and my mom, her brother and their father (my grand) probably was, but he also drank a lot. They all passed long before I was diagnosed.

My oldest sister shares many of my issues and traits, but she has led a rather charmed life. As such, she just thinks that she is being guided by spirits and all is right with the world. While I would feel comfortable talking with her about my diagnosis, she has been a bit elusive in the last few years and I haven't had much time to chat with her.

edit: I see that I inadvertently attached a drawing I was working on for work, funny, but that's what I do.

 

[karen70]

I'm surprised there aren't more of you with an ASD family member. I can trace it through my family from my grandmother, through to my father, to me and then to my son. I think it helps my son that I can relate to him and also help him to understand the world around him because of my experiences. Am I in the minority having an obvious ASD family line?

To be fair I can now see massive resemblances in a few family members, my mom mainly but she won't take the tests online. She said her husband looked it up and found that kids at the age of 3 to 5 usually get diagnosed, so that rules her out ;/ I guess the fact that she's 65, i'm 45 and my eldest is 25 and we were all so small minded and dead set in our ways that to my mom this is irrelevant.
Got to laugh really.

 

[shinkansen]

Look for support groups in your area. I have two near me.

Definitely agree.

I've just attended a support group for the first time. It was really beneficial. Only expected to go for an hour or so, but was there for 4 hours. As the evening went on, I realised you could talk about anything to do with autism. That may seem obvious, but when you go to an autism support group, you have many questions. And you wonder how far fetched some of those questions are.

The experience was positive, re-assuring and recommended.

 

[Madotsuki]

My youngest brother who is 12 years younger might have ASD, but he has far more experiences in life than me.
I can't bring this topic to my parents, my mom will deny it by saying I'm 'normal', and will make my dad angry, to the point to start a fight with him.
My boss acknowledged that I'm different when he hired me, and I told a colleague who I feel close with that I'm neurodiverse; I can't tell if she is NT or not though. She is herself a bit odd, and helped me to cope with those related issues, I try to help her when I can too. Can't thank her enough !

 

[Myway]

My family is a long story, but they seem to be trying to understand things. I just wish that they had from the beginning. They have no real interest in Asperger syndrome or anything along those lines. My mom won't even talk about autism in general. I don't understand why they are being like that. I really want to connect, but can't. It is very hard for me.

 

[Suzanne]

I actually had that chance and she really seemed interested, to the point of asking me how she can help or if there is anything she should not do and I just went blank. I did manage to explain that I have not been asked that before and so, obviously my brain decided to be blank, which got her laughing. I did, however think to say that if I am talking, I tend to go mentally deaf ie I am unaware of my surroundings and she seemed to take that on board and a few times she would sort of face me and say hi and let's go and that bounced me back to reality. I also suspect she is not the type to abuse that knowledge.

Another eases me with hand movement that denotes quieten down, but she confuses me because she tells me she is joking, which leaves me in the dark to whether I have gone overboard in my enthusiasm. But she is a pretty zealous person herself and so, I find myself teasing her with hand movement and think it has become a sort of code between us.

To be honest, the more I associate with people, the more alien I feel and just want to escape.

 

[Suzanne]

I don't have anyone to talk to about my ASD. My parents and sister are NT. The only Aspie family members I have, I almost never see because of distance in travel. No one asks me, so I feel like I can't tell them. They have shut me down on the subject. No one really cares that I have Aspergers. All they want is for me to accept the NT world, never going to happen with me, but I like NTs anyway.

That is how it is with my husband, who keeps demanding that I adapt to his world. He gets angry when I space out and accuses me that I am rude and disrespectful to him and closes his ears when I try to explain.

 

[paloftoon]

That's really sad. I can't understand how any parent wouldn't be interested when it is such a big part of their child's life. It's so important to talk about difficulties and ways to cope and work around them.
Are there groups near you where you could meet other Aspie people? It's nice to be able to share experiences and not to feel like the different one all the time.

It's not necessarily that people don't care always. They might seem like they don't care, but maybe they are overwhelmed with the amount of emotion and need for independent responsibility in their lives. One person can only do so much for others when they have to focus on being breadwinners for their own homes and families. One person only has so much energy in a day sometimes. You do the best you can do with all the love possible. You can't ask for anymore than that!

 

[StephF]

Yes.