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Does doubt or overreacting happen often?

Jdeisher

Jdeisher

Active Member
so I’ve posted plenty over the past few days and have explained almost everything that I have found. But no matter what I do or how I think, I have that thought in my mind that maybe I’m exaggerating or making the obvious signs out to be more then they are....does anyone else ever get these feeling of doubt or thinking that you are being crazy? I mean I have ADHD and I definitely think I have bad anxiety, but the doctors always think I’m lying. So maybe it’s just me being anxious, I have been pretty anxious the last 2 days, even right now. Just some insight or positive feedback would be helpful for me
 
My wife said to me the other week, as we we were looking at a field of sheep, with one black one in it-
'Does the black sheep think it's white?
It has no way to tell.

You know your experience but others can't see it- they have no way to tell.
The only difference is they are a majority but they still can't tell. So why ask?

It's okay to have doubts and be anxious - did you know that?
Trying to stop being anxious that can be the problem.

Accept your thoughts and feelings they reduce in extremity so I have found.
There are lots of distraction tricks to help with that.
You can't beat thoughts with other thoughts
Try cbt ,mindfulness,breathing, the other ideas that other people are about to say
 
I think it's very normal to go through doubts and second guessing yourself when you first realise you might be on the spectrum. Over time everything becomes clearer and your convictions start to solidify. It's a bit of a rollercoaster ride but ultimately everything will feel like it fits and answers questions you didn't even realise you had. Try not to be hard on yourself. :)
 
All the time with me, sadly and right now, huge self doubt.

I have it within my power to help someone I know, needs that help, but huge self doubts keeps overpowering me and causes me to want to back away.

In one way, the kind of help I can give is exactly the kind of help this person needs; but in another way, the way I easily can give that help, is most certainly not the way that personn needs to receive it and so, I am worried that I will do the wrong thing and live to regret it.

Year's ago, I was accused of making social anxiety up. Based on the fact that I was there an therefore, had to get there on my own and the fact that I speak well and dress well all went against me. She did not even allow me to explain how much it took me to get out of the front door. Very dismissive and had me in tears.

My dr now, recognises that I have social anxiety, but laughed when I said I am sure I have aspergers. Said: I have autistic patients and there is no way you are autistic. Add insult to injury was my husband siding with her, despite the fact that he complains daily with my traits.

Although a little break through with my husband. I am terrible with timing. I need exact times being stated. So, when someone says: will be a few minutes, I take that as so and 10 or so minutes later still not back. For the first time, twice now, he has just said: only be a minute and then: I mean: 5 minutes and that enabled me to say: ok, if you want cold coffee and he stopped what he was doing, because he did not wish for cold coffee. Then said, another day: I am popping outside for 10 minutes and that is exactly how long he stayed out for.

My husband is exactly like your wife and yet, there are tiny successes, because he sees the positive results with me, which encourages him to carry on in the same way.

Keep reminding your wife, when required, just how much you need to find out about aspergers, so that you can be a better husband. Ask her to do a bit of research on male aspergers and there is plenty out there, since aspergers is mainly recognised in males.

My husband has often complained that I am not affectionate enough. Like you, I am not into kissing and have to turn my face away, so he does not see me wipe my face, as it feels yucky on my skin. He is a very good kisser though, so it is not about him; it is about the action that I find rather repulsive.

I am terrible with touching too. I feel nothing and so, in actual fact, it is an awful sensation, whereas my husband is a very tactile man.
 
Jdeisher said:
so I’ve posted plenty over the past few days and have explained almost everything that I have found. But no matter what I do or how I think, I have that thought in my mind that maybe I’m exaggerating or making the obvious signs out to be more then they are....does anyone else ever get these feeling of doubt or thinking that you are being crazy? I mean I have ADHD and I definitely think I have bad anxiety, but the doctors always think I’m lying. So maybe it’s just me being anxious, I have been pretty anxious the last 2 days, even right now. Just some insight or positive feedback would be helpful for me
Click to expand...
Personally, no - not at all. My experience was that for the first time in my life, the symptoms fit perfectly, without any exaggeration on my own part. There is a very real phenomenon of people starting to feel that they have certain symptoms when they really don't have them to the degree that they think they do. I've heard students of psychology might sometimes feel they could be diagnosed with various things, for example, but they really don't have them - it's just a psychological thing. Keep in mind, also, that there is a range of symptoms and a range of intensity across the spectrum.
 
Thank you, I honestly had a very difficult life, from the moment I started have symptoms until today. My dad took no responsibility and left us so my mother had to raise us alone. My brother had very bad medical issues and I didn’t get the attention or affection that could have possibly showed what was really going on with me. Everyone always swore I was lying when I did speak because I couldn’t have eye contact and answered things with 1 or 2 words. And used Stims at the same time(constantly moving or fidgeting some way). I grew up with no friends, no one to talk to, not knowing how to express myself. I learned to be fake to try to fit in. Then I got myself into situations where I was just a loser kid handcuffed in cop cars, or exaggerating about things, or being called a liar, or a fake. I had people tell me to my face I would grow up to be a loser. I had no way of defending myself because I didn’t know how to react. My therapists always told me I overreacted or they thought I was lying to get meds. So my entire life I lived and learned to doubt myself in every situation. So I wouldn’t be disappointed...maybe that’s why I am feeling like this today
 
The reason you may think you are exaggerating is because of persons that are either non-supportive or who are clueless or with agenda or reason to say you do not have such a condition. Do not let them win. If you feel you have that condition, and it all makes sense based on all your signs and symptoms and after research, and after seeing others' experiences about ASD or Aspergers, then you have that condition.

Have you ever heard the saying, "Mother knows best," too? Well, that is not always true of course, but a mother would have no reason to lie and say now you had all those specific Autistic signs and symptoms as a child if you did not, and you remember and lived and live through many of those other ASD issues since a child. Just because your mother or others could not figure things out then, or any doctors or therapists you saw as those things were not addressed then, that does not mean it's all not true.

There are many persons on this site that have said they have Aspergers or ASD too and without formal diagnosis yet. Of course ASD can manifests in many different ways, and in varying severity levels, and not all members share everything about their conditions but glimpses, so I do not doubt their self-diagnoses or beliefs either. They know best about themselves as well. You shared almost everything you know, with help from your mother's recall too, and I sincerely believe you have that condition, assuming those facts you stated.

So, try not to worry about what those other non-believers think. If an accurate medical diagnosis is important for you, keep forging forward until that happens and do not give up. We never gave up too, when all those naysayers tried to act like it was some parenting problem, and that our children's unique issues must be environment related. Now, they look like fools. I wish there was repurcussions for their failures to do their duties as a medical professional, and for other family and the public being cynical and blaming. Unfortunately, most never admitted wrong. In your case, it is your choice though, to believe, get what you need, and do what you have got to do to bring you peace of mind, and get further support.
 
Can anyone tell me how an ASD mind is wired differently from and NT? Is it literally wired differently, or is that like a metaphor or whatever they call it. Are ASD minds able to learn the traits that they have troubles with?
 
It is at least suspected, if not proven, that those with ASD tend to have part(s) of their brain overdeveloped, and part(s) at least underdeveloped. That is why they can have more extreme certain abilities, and less of other abilities, with certain core areas affected.

Some traits or signs and symptoms can be hidden better through various treatment attempts or through learning, or bettered, but some or many things may not be able to be changed, and should not be changed. Sorry for the generalizations there, without many specifics, but it all depends on the person with ASD, as each is different.
 
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Ok I was just trying to figure out some things about myself. I avoided any type of eye contact while I was younger, I literally never even looked up, and now I refuse to look up while I am walking anywhere that there is people so they can’t look me in the eyes, but I’m able to glance up and through people I’m very comfortable with(my brother, mother, wife) but I look through or around them, unless it’s them confronting me. But strangers or people I barely know don’t see my eyes. Coworkers get the wandering eye, where I talk but am looking at material or machinery or something else.i was wondering if it could be because of my meds. I’m on 90 mg of adderall daily. It makes me super talkative, but only things I’m interested in still, but it’s an insanely strong stimulant. Could that be helpful towards my social issues?? If anyone has any insight on this it would definitely clear some things up!!
 
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