Do you find it strange to tell friends you love them?

[. . .]

Do you find it strange to tell friends you love them? Do you think that telling someone you love them should be reserved for lovers and family . . . and not friends?

 

[King_Oni]

No I don't... but in general I'm not that much of a person to randomly say "I love you" to lovers or family either. I do show my appreciation to some people that might be considered "friends" by me.

But no I don't think it should be reserved exclusively.

 

[Gomendosi]

If I find someone I am able to call friend, someone I am willing to let see the real me, someone who doesn’t run away screaming into the hills at the first true glimpse of the chaos that makes up an aspergical mind, then I may consider them a friend and so, would have no qualms about telling them I love them.

However, love is subjective, I love a pet, my mother and a lover equally, but not in the same ways (thank heaven), I think love is having gotten used to someone/ thing being around all the time, when its/ they are gone, you miss them!

Using that ideal, I can love a TV show and miss it when it’s axed, I can love a male friend and not want to sleep with him, I can love a quick jog through the park… my point is, that I believe that in today’s lexicon love and lust are intermingled and the proper love you see in films, say, when a soldier is dying of a fatal wound and his buddy puts pressure on it and says “don’t you die on me man, I love you”, that’s the one you mean here and I have no hesitation saying it. Now ask me if people are willing to hear it… that’s a different question! I really do think it does mean something else now, am I right?

I think you should be able to say it to anyone you consider deserves it!

 

[2010Dolby]

Wow, I was expecting to think its strange along with everyone else. Looks like I've got the minority opinion so far! haha

I think its weird. I hate doing it. I treat all my friends great but saying "I love you" (or any variation) to a friend? That would make me so uncomfortable. If you and a friend are close then it should be known without needing to speak it. Just my opinion though

 

[epath13]

For very long time it was strange for me to say to anyone that I love them. My parents never did it, I rarely heard anyone doing it even though I thought it was pretty cool. Plus I couldn't quite decide what love was. Later I sort of had to train myself to say it without feeling that it's weird. As for friends... not sure... never done it. Would I want to do it...? I don't feel it's necessary... I just don't feel like doing it. I've heard people saying that they missed me or that I was a blessing to them, but I wasn't sure how to respond. I can appreciate a person and his/ her qualities and I will tell him/ her about it. I will even acknowledge a unique connection with someone if it exists. I think I can define 2 types of love - unattached love, that just exists and sort of emanates from my heart (I guess more of a spiritual thing ) and love to people I'm connected with - my immediate family. Friends... are more of companions, I'm not connected to them... You can feel love for people around you, but it's different kind of love, it is not an attachment so mentioning it in statement like "I love you" doesn't make sense to me Hope my explanation is clear enough

 

[2010Dolby]

For very long time it was strange for me to say to anyone that I love them. My parents never did it

Yea, exactly. It might be an upbringing thing. My parents were always really caring towards me but didnt verbally show it much. I once dated a girl whos family would kiss the kids good night and stuff. I thought it was so odd! But I later found out thats normal to some people

 

[Bay]

Friends? What are those, haha. I mostly spend time with family. Most of whom I genuinely love, a few I don't (but I would never tell them that). My family is pretty accepting of my oddness, as I am with them and theirs. We're all odd together and usually it works. My step-son is another story. I love him but he doesn't get me at all. He is very NT, Mr. Sociability. Other than my partner, my sister is my best friend. I tell her I love her often.

 

[GhettoButterFly]

Do you find it strange to tell friends you love them? Do you think that telling someone you love them should be reserved for lovers and family . . . and not friends?

Well, well a topic that sparks my interest.

I know it's almost midnight EST and my mind might be a bit foggy and please forgive me for my fogginess. I might ask for this post to be edited later.

Anyway... No, I do not find it strange to tell friends that I love them. It is important to tell friends, family, and people you feel connected to that you love them. There is many different kinds of love. Love you feel for a lover, love you feel for family, and love you feel for friends. There is also love you feel for everyday people and such (Christian-lee* love or spiritual love).

For everyone here, I love y'all in a Christian-lee*/spiritual kind of way. I hope that doesn't offend or make anyone angry. If it does, then that is on you then.

Some of my friends find it strange that I tell them that I love them. It makes me sad, but that's ok... I guess they aren't connected like I am (emotionally and such). I just care about people too much and I am too kind at times.

Well I guess I don't know what else to add to this post. Take care everyone and don't mind me. ^_^;

*I am spelling it phonically. As in how I say it. Also I know it might not be a word, but oh well...

 

[Geordie]

No, not at all.

I think love has to be frank, if I really love someone and someone also feels my love, I think I should tell her, I love her. I just want to know whether she feels for me.

However, I don't have this feeling now, and I don't expect to have this feeling any time soon. I have no time (I spend my free time reading about business stuff), and am in no mood to 'love'.

 

[earthsteward70]

My mom told me she loved me every day. My dad however never told me he loved me except when I asked, and his response would be 'sure'. In my adult life, I'd say I love you, but if it happened more than once a day I'd start feeling like I was being repetitive. I never did tell friends that I love them however, unless they really seemed to need to hear it, as a show of support from me. I always felt that it would be misunderstood if used too casually.

 

[Arashi222]

I tell my family and people I am close to that I love them. I tell my close friends I love them if I mean it. I won't if I don't. I think like earthsteward70 if its too casual it looses some of the meaning.

 

[HelloDizzy]

People say "hate is a strong word" and tell you not to use it. Guess it's equal opposite isn't as strong because people throw that word AROUND.
I don't say it to friends if I don't. I also just don't like saying it unless I'm dating you.

 

[Butterfly_Lady]

There is only one friend i ever loved like a sister and actually felt comfortable saying it to and she moved away after middle school. other then that yes i find it strange.

 

[Dara]

I find it normal, but I rarely say it to them. I may say it about them when talking to others, I may write it to them (like in e-mails or texts) but I rarely say "I love you".
There are two different ways to say it (in my language): one shows affection (friends, family, pets) and one love in a deeper/more intense way (romantic too).
I 'learnt' to be comfortable with the first one, but not the second one, even if I said that to a few of my friends and heard it from them as well.


My Friends are my family, though.

 

[76054Pluto]

The only people I tell I love them are close family members. I think I would find it a bit embarrassing if I said it to my friends. I think that I have a kind of unspoken love for my friends and its just accepted that we all care about each other.

 

[Pella]

I think good friends become like family and can end up being more important than some family.

The weird thing is though, that I have so few people in my life, and so I have gotten in the habit of saying I love you when I say goodbye. The problem is, that when I do interact with others, I am almost saying I love you when I say goodbye, it almost happened with my therapist a few times, and with someone I was having a conversation with last night at this social thing. I think it would be easier to explain to my therapist but so very awkward with others.

 

[music.forlife7]

S far, the only people I say I love you too are to my family and my teacher, who has been my teacher since 2005. I know it might sound unusual to say I love you to a teacher, but she's grown close to me and she's helped me through a lot of tough circumstances, especially when I was first diagnosed. As for my friends, we don't say that to each other though we do give hugs and say other sincere things. I love you is a phrase that shouldn't be said to a person you meet right away, because I believe that you have to really know and trust the other person, and vice versa. It took me a long time to get used to saying that to my teacher because I wasn't used to saying I love you to anyone outside of my immediate family. Over time, I got used to it, and she seems like another member of the family to me now.

 

[Ste11aeres]

I think it should be normal. However, personally, I don't use the word "love" with anyone. Just for some reason, I prefer not to use it.

 

[Historianthomas]

My close friend and I say "love you" to each other frequently. She started it when she said to me, "I love you bro." At first I felt weird saying it, because I have never said that to anyone except for my family and girlfriend. Now I am quite use to it. I would only reserve this to close friends, family, and my girlfriend however.

 

[anne.bc]

Not at all. Once we get close enough with our relationship, we just voluntarily say it. I have awesome friends. Not a lot of them, but they're still pretty freakin' awesome. :love: