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Do you annoy NTs without realizing it?

Yes theminxx, NTs all have varying rules and norms. It's so hard. I'm starting to think that the only option for us is this: just be honest and direct (like our default Aspie mode) and not care so much when NTs get offended. Obviously don't purposely use bad language or lack of manners (learn NT general social norms, of their versions in how they show respect) and try to remember to apply them. But if you forget or don't manage to work out the expected norm, you can either explain your Aspie symptoms or just explain that you didn't intend to be offensive. If they can't handle that, well f*** them. I've seriously had enough of explaining myself to them, especially to those NTs that should know me better.
 
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Sometimes I wish I could gather a bunch of NTs and perform science experiments and test them out on what annoys and or offends them and what does not, then take notes on my clip board for the results, then i will know what to say and not to say or do. The NT test subjects will be paid for compensation afterwards in the name of science, now excuse me as I adjust my lab coat and equipment!
 
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Hello. I do this most certainly. My friends get mad at me for not knowing what I did wrong socially. That was before being diagnosed though. I don't know what's going to happen now though. I also correct people and I interrupt the conversation just to point out their error, which annoys them. As I found out I had ASD, I pointed out not one, but two mistakes the psychologist made. I didn't realize pointing out others mistakes are a bad thing because I correct them when that isn't the point of what they are saying. Like saying they need to print 3 things instead of 4 of my assessment is one of the thing that happened.
 
AspieOtaku said:
We as in those on the spectrum.
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I wasn't hated,possibly envied,often exploited but was provided with many very interesting opportunities because of what my mind was worth to others. I was not even aware exactly how different I was until late in life,so my discovery day was an enlightenment of how it was all possible,not a reflection of a curse that held me back.

To generalize that we are all hated as a whole is not something that I will support because I can't identify with it at all. It would be a pretty sure bet that there are others out there just like me that were only considered either moody or odd at times,but perfectly able to function in the world ;)
 
Nitro said:
I wasn't hated,possibly envied,often exploited but was provided with many very interesting opportunities because of what my mind was worth to others. I was not even aware exactly how different I was until late in life,so my discovery day was an enlightenment of how it was all possible,not a reflection of a curse that held me back.

To generalize that we are all hated as a whole is not something that I will support because I can't identify with it at all. It would be a pretty sure bet that there are others out there just like me that were only considered either moody or odd at times,but perfectly able to function in the world ;)
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I am not saying all but most of us are, although from experiece it is easy to generalize since most NTs generalize us.
 
AspieOtaku said:
I am not saying all but most of us are, although from experiece it is easy to generalize since most NTs generalize us.
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Most? Where does this come from? Many of the NT population know little to nothing about autism,so we can rule all of those out. Autism can be a hidden or ignored condition like many that are my age that didn't seek support or never really needed it.
Your generalizations hold no water for me because they have too many holes in them from the beginning.

With the information age came greater awareness of autism for many,but not all or even a majority as far as that goes. Most of the time when autism is portrayed by the media,it is only in a negative light assuming that it was ugly old autism that cause someone to snap. That method sells newspapers and advertising quite well which is exactly what they intended to do by sensationalizing the stories with gloom and doom and using autism for the fear factor to do so at times. Television and the media is behind a lot of false and phony crap when it involved money.
There is no cut and dried us and them about any of it. The NT population has many psychological conditions that go unnoticed until one of them goes outside of what is considered normal to the rest of society.You are trying to pin a label on everyone on or off the spectrum and only pointing a finger to one side as the reason for it. Not very healthy if you ask me and may only serve to obscure your cause,not place it in focus.



The day you come to terms that having the condition is not always a curse for many of us that are/were overlooked,you might have a better understanding of what I am posting ;)
 
AspieOtaku said:
I am not saying all but most of us are, although from experiece it is easy to generalize since most NTs generalize us.
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Well sadly a large portion of those on the spectrum do not truly know what to say or do without offending or annoying those not on the spectrum we cannot help it we do not know at first but it is a learning experience.
 
AspieOtaku said:
Well sadly a large portion of those on the spectrum do not truly know what to say or do without offending or annoying those not on the spectrum we cannot help it we do not know at first but it is a learning experience.
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It appears I have offended or annoyed you and you have offended or annoyed me...does that automatically make one of us and not the other on the autism spectrum or just having a disagreement as all humans do.


An autism spectrum diagnosis is a very subjective event that requires a set of traits to be recognized for a status. Not all of the traits need to be present,only selected sets for the definition. It is in fact defined as a spectrum because the traits are not always present in every version of autism. While I can share some traits with a non-verbal autie, they possibly do not have any of the gifts I got from it. To be fair,maybe they are experiencing a part of the world that is way beyond anything we can even dream of because we have no barometer to look at to compare ourselves to them.

Not all pros will always agree with each other because it is based on opinions. Many won't make the cut due to how flawed the psychological process is while others may be misidentified as having other conditions that are not the actual cause of their issues. There is the part about how many are on the spectrum that cannot be narrowed down as much as you would like to think it could be,which is yet another opinion ;)
 
AveApollo said:
They hate being corrected on facts or logic. They get irratated, but I have a compulsion to correct if I know they are factually wrong or illogical.
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Yup! I am a bear about that also, rarely paying any attention to the "cues" that the person involved is being "offended" (partial exceptions are people who are personally important to me). I used to teach logic (both traditional Aristotelian and modern symbolic logic). Standing in front of the class I didn't worry about someone who might be "offended" when I corrected their errors!
 
AspieOtaku said:
Sometimes I try and come off friendly but annoy NTs by being repetative and sometimes blurt things inappropriate without knowing this, do you do the same?
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I am currently of the belief that I annoy NTs, and that there is little I can really do about this, at least in part
because it seems to have "come with what it means" for me to be aspie. I often do not seem to have the sense
that might for example tell NTs that they have annoyed someone.
 
There are times we cannot help it, we get repetitive and hyper at times and might just say whats annoying us or on our mind and annoy others, but sometimes what we cannot help and those we annoy or offend we feel bad about it for a long time. At least for me but not everyone this is just from my experience.
 
I know I've annoyed people without realizing it. One of my housemates has a temper, anyway and can get snippy with me if I say something wrong. It's like walking on eggshells. She and my other housemate are aware I have Asperger's, but I don't know if they give a damn or not.
 
I know sometimes at the computer lab at my school I feel a need to stare at the person across from me. I think I do it out of fear they are going to hurt me (I'm also an abuse survivor). I imagine people find it annoying but I don't mean it.
 
It sure does feel this way a lot of the time, but this goes for people in general, regardless of their mental health status. They give that impression, but more often than not they have no qualms about telling me straight-up. I have a lot of anxiety before and shame following social interactions that I inadvertently butcher. I feel like a fat lumbering klutz who lacks basic coordination skills that the rest of the population takes for granted.
 
I currently am of the view, that I will in all probability always be alone, and that
my Aspie makes this a very strong possibility. Beyond which I do not really enjoy
social interaction.
I like very nerdy women, and I am currently of the view that it is very improbable
that I could cross those social hurdles that might allow me to hook up, so to speak,
with someone like that.
 
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