Been going out with a girl for almost 4 years now and today I decided to end it as I'm moving away for my job and long distance is unlikely to work. On top of all that I've had a good time with this girl. I've enjoyed the time we spent together but I just never felt that I loved her as much as she loved me. I liked her but I just felt nothing. I guess what I want to know is this. Will I feel this way forever or have I just not met "the right person yet" I feel really bad for her as this breakup for her seemingly came out of nowhere and I told her that it would be cruel for me to keep going out with her and not give her 100%. Any suggestions or experience?
It's hard to say, as some persons are just not into marriage and a very long term commitment until they find that person that really they could not do without and really love enough to want things more legal. Granted it would have been preferable you ended things sooner with her, if you knew earlier she was not the one for you for marriage or longer term commitment, and I hope you were not telling her you loved her much and often, which could have led to her thinking there was a pretty big chance of marriage, as that's possibly why she stayed and as she could have found another then, or not put forth as much efforts if she knew it was more temporary relationship.
But, it's your right to go, and to learn from this experience, both good, neutral and any bad, just as she likely got got, neutral and bad too, those years together or dating. The last thing I would tell anyone would be for them to stay longer in a relationship than they desire, no matter who is at fault for the breakup, or to get married because the other one will be very upset otherwise. Yes, she could be really upset now, but she'd likely be more upset if things went even longer and you backed away then, or if you were married and were showing you wanted out of the relationship, and as your heart, body and efforts could be elsewhere. There is lot of responsibility with legal or promised commitment, and even more so if a child and a divorce occurs.
For those here who may want to just blame one side, um, we just have basic information here, and each side must have gotten something from the relationship to have stayed that long. We cannot assume anyone wanted any marriage, regardless who felt or showed more love. These days more women are becoming more independent, and not relying as much on men, as they either have careers or are less interested in children. But, hopefully both men and women are honest to each other once the dating or relationship seems to being going on for a longer period, with clearly stated intentions, desires or needs, and/or to have communications open there.
Too often assumptions can be made during relationships or persons give false hope. As long as both sides were upfront, I see no problem with the relationship having ending as it did. I rather have than that abuse, cheating and neglect, and one or both sides hanging on for the wrong reasons.