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Corrupt A Wish

Sounds good; I yearn for him to be happy.

Granted, but then you have to eat a full dinner at breakfast time - and you're so not interested.
That's fine, I'll just have breakfast for dinner- the finest meal that ever was.

I wish I had a car.
 
Granted. But now your whole life is lived inside the forum game: Get the Cookie.

I wish I had a pumpkin spice latte.
 
Granted. You have the most comfortable shoes ever to be made. But they turn into wet envelopes in the rain.

I wish I had a horse so I could brush and braid its mane.
 
Granted. There is one waiting for you, in Japan. Better hurry, before it gets cold.

I wish I had a swimming pool.
 
You do, but it's a combination of those rats from Ratatouille cleaning stuff in your sink.

I wish I had a vacation home.
 
Your wish is granted! But alas, your vacation home is actually the local jail, where you'll be spending the next two weeks. All expenses paid: Three hots and a cot.

I wish I lived in a house instead of an apartment.
 
Granted, but you have a colony of endangered fruit bats (so you can't get rid of them) in your attic.

I wish I had a glass of nice, ice-cold strawberry lemonade
 
granted, but now there is a law against drinking strawberry lemonade.

i wish i had a converted schoolbus for road trips.
 
Granted- but it's still just a regular school bus, complete with screaming elementary schoolers. The only way it's 'converted' is that the bus itself found Jesus.

I wish I could talk to squirrels
 
Granted. But now every squirrel on earth follows you everywhere, thinking you are their mother.

I wish that whenever i reached in my pocket, I'd find money.
 
Granted, but it's Monopoly money - and you HATE Monopoly.

I wish that they'd make solar-charged phones already.
 

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