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Featured College troubles?

Discussion in 'General Autism Discussion' started by BradT, Dec 4, 2019.

  1. BradT

    BradT Well-Known Member

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    I'm having some troubles in college, not from an academic perspective, but from a social perspective. I feel like noone likes me even though I haven't done anything. The way some of these students look at me makes me think they feel uncomfortable around me. I'm 31 years old with a bunch of early 20 year olds, but still I don't think that would be the reason they would look at me funny.
     
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  2. AuBurney Tuckerson

    AuBurney Tuckerson ~GigglesTheAutisticHyena~

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    I'm 20, and I often catch people staring or looking at me funny. I just glare back at them.
     
  3. BradT

    BradT Well-Known Member

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    I feel like a young adult with a bunch of kids.
     
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  4. Trophonius

    Trophonius Active Member

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    Are you sure it's not only your impression?

    What are the objective elements of their behavior you believe are "funny"?
     
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  5. Darwin

    Darwin Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    College troubles? Yup. No friends, bullying, staring, etc. I am happy, though, that I am superior academically and intellectually, but hoping to find someone I respect and like in the future.
     
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  6. clg114

    clg114 Still crazy, after all these years. Staff Member V.I.P Member

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    You get treated that way because you are different from almost everyone else. NTs do not like different. They like to be like everyone in their group. Sometimes I get a little envious of their social abilities, but there is nothing I can do about that. So I just take advantage of my abilities and enjoy being a Aspie.
     
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  7. BradT

    BradT Well-Known Member

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    Not bullied, well because they know better lol.

    Honestly though? Everyone just does there own thing and don't really bother anyone.
     
  8. Darwin

    Darwin Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    Yes, I get bullied. From a psychological perspective, I noticed that some of my bullies subconsciously use body language suggestive of over-confidence (which is just a sign of stubbornness,) while others actually subconsciously use body language showing self-esteem issues when talking to others. It was interesting when I first noticed that. Funny, no?
     
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  9. clg114

    clg114 Still crazy, after all these years. Staff Member V.I.P Member

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    That goes to show that people who bully other people, are not the most stable people that you will encounter.
     
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  10. Darwin

    Darwin Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    That’s right. Most people, however, avoid others who they find weird or who they don’t understand. It’s annoying, but we have to admit that we, as neurodiverse people, do the same with others who we find weird. It’s a human instinct that actually has been very important for our survival but, unfortunately, it is not perfect.
     
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  11. BradT

    BradT Well-Known Member

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    I haven't been bothered though, except for a few weird stares. I've gotten along with almost everyone.
     
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  12. BradT

    BradT Well-Known Member

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    But those few weird stares gets on my nerves.
     
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  13. tducey

    tducey Well-Known Member

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    To bad to hear this. Maybe you could join a club to get to know these people better.
     
  14. BradT

    BradT Well-Known Member

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    I'm a commuter though so I do wonder the residents do on campus while I'm not there.

    If they ever were to come up to my face though and call me a "retard:", "fag" or anything like that, they will be bloodied on the ground.
     
  15. Darwin

    Darwin Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    It is good that you have courage, but I prefer to just ignore them. Generally, when someone does something, it is because they have some goal, which, in case of bullying, is mostly to see the bullied person's submissive reactions or just annoy him/her. If you just ignore them completely as if nothing has happened, they will not get the "reward" they were looking for, and will eventually stop. In my case, they also respected me, and, believe it it not, 1 of them tried to be friends with me. This takes longer time, though, but it is not risky.
     
  16. Jorg

    Jorg Well-Known Member

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    As someone who is in a similar age and situation I don't think you need to feel bad of being older than your classmates.

    I am 29yo and I'm also in college/university, I have had some anxiety related issues so I have been in college more time than "normal" (I finally graduate next year). I'm currently around 5-6 years older than the rest of my classmates (and lastt semester I had a 19yo classmate so figure it out) and I have had some other ones who are older than me. Once I had to work with a guy who entered college in 1987 and he still was taking classes; just a couple of weeks ago I finished the semester and I worked with a guy who entered in 1993, both of them with families. My point is, there's no shame in being older than your classmates; there are a lot of reasons for that to happend; in the case of my older classmates they started working while studying or got married and left studies aside, but the important thing is not to give up and if you want something just go for it.

    It may be something cultural in some countries; but at least from where Iam from and many of my classmates believes is that age doesn't matter, sure sometimes that "generational gap" can be weird but there's a lot of respect in those students who never gave up and want to accomplish their goal.

    Remember don't feel bad for being older, be confident in yourself! You can learn something new from you classmates and your classmates can learn something from you too! Hell I have learned a lot about working experience and stuff from my older classmates.
     
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  17. BradT

    BradT Well-Known Member

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    I want to interact with women so bad, but how can I start a conversation with a random woman I don't know, but I'm interested in? Small talk at first?
     
  18. AuBurney Tuckerson

    AuBurney Tuckerson ~GigglesTheAutisticHyena~

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    I feel inferior academically.. I often feel like the only dimwitt on a class full of savants and geniuses.

     
  19. Darwin

    Darwin Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    I was never good at that...

    Women here might help you. But I recommend that you read some book about body language so, when you approach someone, you know if they are actually interested or not. The Definitive Book of Body Language is a great book, and it has a chapter about the body language that both sexes express when attracted to someone.
     
  20. BradT

    BradT Well-Known Member

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    I post on a neurotypical forum too and they say regardless women in their 20's will not date a guy in his 30's who is a student too. They say the age is just too big of a factor. I think they maybe right. Even though I'm still technically a millenial.