Cashier Anxiety?

[Judge]

Having worked as a cashier (l have had a variety of jobs), they are treated poorly by a lot of people. So one day, perhaps you will ask or say something nice.

I'm polite and cordial enough to them in terms of what they say. I'm just saying that I don't normally ask how they are doing. Not as store checkers, but as complete strangers. I simply don't make it a point to ask about one's welfare whom I don't even know in the slightest. That's all.

To me it's just an "NT custom" that to my mind is a non-sequitur.

And yes, I also have worked as a retail cashier. Not a memorable experience. A job where I had to actually write receipts manually, always properly counting out change returned. Using a calculator to determine sales tax. Occasionally quite stressful when a line of customers would begin to form on busy days.

 

[rubicks52]

I worked as a cashier for a summer at a large store and the managers wanted us to constantly be talking to the customers for a more "friendly" experience. Most of the conversations fell into predictable patterns, so to keep myself from getting horribly bored I spent a good amount of time perfecting my conversations to make people laugh/smile. It's amazing how if you tell the same joke a hundred times, you can get the timing down well enough that most people would at least smirk at it. I never found that talking while scanning items made me mess up. That insistence on talking and being all cheerful made the job absolutely exhausting and no way would I ever work there again. But I used to get super anxious around cashiers before I became a cashier and I realized that as a cashier, I didn't care at all about what the customer was doing. Even if someone was taking five minutes to count out change, I didn't care. At least is was something different to break up the routine of the day.

 

[Yeshuasdaughter]

u-scan is an aspie's best friend. until.... the dumb machine freezes up because you did something wrong and then the cashier has to come over and help you.

 

[Varzar]

u-scan is an aspie's best friend. until.... the dumb machine freezes up because you did something wrong and then the cashier has to come over and help you.

Lol, I was thinking the same thing when @paloftoon mentioned self checkout..
I love self-checkout, when it isn't the worst product of software engineering ever...

 

[BlueSky Aozora]

Hi, i would be anxious like you too especially when there is someone lining up behind. And thinking about efficiency too.

However, i think it is not worth it for the marriage, to argue with your wife just because she does that. It might be shameful if she rambles around for 5 minutes or more, but i dont think it takes that much. And perhaps she was thinking of saving money, for both of you. And she is much more important to you than the cashier and the people lining up behind. And, she did nothing wrong.

I do understand the irritating and anxious feeling when thinking about inefficiency. I think it's ok to just tell her gently that people are waiting, but argument may not worth it. Happy wife is better than sad wife, isn't that so? And sorry if i misunderstood your post.

 

[UberScout]

This is how it usually goes for me:

Me: *has groceries on list parents made, including a KitKat as an optional item*

Cashier: Will that be all for you sir?

Me, facing the wrong way: Yes ma'am, that's all.

Cashier: ....Uh, Haha, I'm a guy....hah..

Me: Is that for here or to go?

Cashier: ...This...isn't a restaurant...

Me: Oh sorry, blanked out for a minute. *fumbles in wallet for money* Will this cover it? *holds up what he thinks is dollar bills but is actually a folded-up drawing of two custom-drawn Boo characters, a Male and female, displaying affection to each other, the Male labeled "Kazuma" and the female labeled "Lyra" in response to a girl he met agreeing to date him in the behavioral hospital*

Cashier: ...

 

[Varzar]

Hi, i would be anxious like you too especially when there is someone lining up behind. And thinking about efficiency too.

However, i think it is not worth it for the marriage, to argue with your wife just because she does that. It might be shameful if she rambles around for 5 minutes or more, but i dont think it takes that much. And perhaps she was thinking of saving money, for both of you. And she is much more important to you than the cashier and the people lining up behind. And, she did nothing wrong.

I do understand the irritating and anxious feeling when thinking about inefficiency. I think it's ok to just tell her gently that people are waiting, but argument may not worth it. Happy wife is better than sad wife, isn't that so? And sorry if i misunderstood your post.

That's a totally valid point and a great perspective. I feel the need to apologize to her now. I will do that when she's off work..

As it is, she responded with understanding of my anxiety and agreed to be prepared for me in the future. so It wasn't exactly a prolonged or unresolved argument or anything..

But still, I appreciate your perspective on it.. I'm now kicking myself for not seeing it that way..

 

[Mary Terry]

Yeah. Social anxiety at its worst. When even the most casual interaction can be awkward- even painful.

Exacerbated by the potential of being shortchanged. Where you try to be social with them to some degree, but watching every move they make in the process. One autistic person to another, while it may seem innocuous to most people, it's not to us.

Though in all fairness I have to add that I try to be social with them, even engaging in silly small talk that I know cannot last long as I'm in a line. I view it simply as "practice". Otherwise living in near isolation really could make me into an old curmudgeon. Kind of like Walter Eckland (Cary Grant) in "Father Goose".

The Filthy Beast:

Oh- and I always have my card ready without fail. Need that discount !

One saving grace. As you age, you may find that you care less and less about such encounters no matter how they end.

That's one of my favorite movies. Haven't seen it in decades. I confess, I've always liked romantic comedies. They're good escapism for me.

 

[Judge]

That's one of my favorite movies. Haven't seen it in decades. I confess, I've always liked romantic comedies. They're good escapism for me.

As a young boy when I saw that film, I didn't romanticize romance in it. I romanticized the idea of being isolated from the world- and liking it. I may not have been aware of being autistic, but looking back it's just another sign that I was born this way.

And at the moment occasionally smirk at the idea of being like Walter Eckland. Never did get a boat though. Nor a wife.

 

[tducey]

I really don't have anxiety in a cash line, if anything bothers me in a cash line it's when people are taking to long or buying lottery tickets.

 

[gaffaglow]

I love self-checkout lines.

 

[Varzar]

Hi, i would be anxious like you too especially when there is someone lining up behind. And thinking about efficiency too.

However, i think it is not worth it for the marriage, to argue with your wife just because she does that. It might be shameful if she rambles around for 5 minutes or more, but i dont think it takes that much. And perhaps she was thinking of saving money, for both of you. And she is much more important to you than the cashier and the people lining up behind. And, she did nothing wrong.

I do understand the irritating and anxious feeling when thinking about inefficiency. I think it's ok to just tell her gently that people are waiting, but argument may not worth it. Happy wife is better than sad wife, isn't that so? And sorry if i misunderstood your post.

So, I apologized to my wife for not being more patient, and prioritizing her over the needs of strangers..
She cried, cause she was happy I could understand a different perspective, one that supported her..

I just wanted to thank you again @BlueSky Aozora!

 

[BlueSky Aozora]

So, I apologized to my wife for not being more patient, and prioritizing her over the needs of strangers..
She cried, cause she was happy I could understand a different perspective, one that supported her..

I just wanted to thank you again @BlueSky Aozora!

You're going to make me cry too.. How you replied and what you did are really amazing, bravo!