So, it appears that in my usual way I MIGHT have totally missed what the program director was saying to me, like I might have totally missed the entire concept and now I feel so guilty because I have been hating her for a week, thinking that she had called me a pinhead (at this point, I am laughing about that myself). . I spoke with her and asked her to clarify what she meant by those comments, and here is the email she sent back. And I am having a hard time figuring out what she is saying or trying to suggest, but I think that it has to do with the mind blindness stuff, and that I was kind of like filling in the blanks where I didn't understand things socially. This is her letter and I would be most grateful for anyone who could interpret it.
:
"I'm glad you asked for clarification. No need to apologize. Yes, in this instance you misconstrued the context of the remark. The remark wasn't about you at all but rather about the optical illusion that when people sit far away from their cameras and aren't fully in frame on ZOOM it gives the illusion of them being very, very tiny and when the camera is low (not on a table or desk that is level with the person) the body can appear to be disproportionately larger than the head. This illusion happens when the laptop camera is far away from the person and at a lower angle, so my comment wasn't about you or your appearance in any way but was describing the illusion itself. "
WHAT is she talking about? One of the problems is that I don't have a very good sense of when someone is being mean to me.
She has done other things like taking my ideas without giving credit...so I have very little trust for her, but this one has really been an eye opener, because I think I really went off track where my mind was going. Like at times, I feel like I am missing a sense of intuition, Like it's just not completely there, and where other people have intutiion mixed into the recipe they can fill in the blanks where people aren't being clear. and in the past that has gotten me in trouble, because if you don't have a sense of intuition about what people want and mean then you can be at the liberty of others. . Like other people could have heard that slur and would know what it meant without having to have someone explain it to them.