Thank you for the greater detail. Suffering and attachment are concepts I have heard of before. My own path is much different than what you walk. To return to the OP, are there writings or talks readily available to provide introduction, that you might reccomend to a seeker, such as she seems to be. Most of the rest of us have neither the time nor talent to pursue a lifetime of study.
It is like a 3 legged stool: Mind/thinking, emotion/feeling, and training or habituating through physical action IE: experiential learning, conditioning by doing, learning by doing. In the west, it is common to take things apart to understand or learn things. But, it doesn't work here and is, in fact, a destructive approach.
Most people, especially nowadays, pursue solutions through "thinking" and "more thinking", and sitting and reading and watching a video, etc, and "more thinking". Works temporarily at best.
Others, go to seminars, group meditation and other short forays, and "feel good" because of that effort an environment. Like temporarily escaping the dirty swimming pool of daily life and stepping into a cleansing place but having to back to the pool where "life happens" all over again.
So, there has to be a comprehensive effort and pursued self discipline of "doing" that integrates thinking and feeling as well. But, that seems like hard work and sitting and feeling good or sitting and thinking is much easier. Far easier than engaging the entirety of; mind, body, spirit.
For example: one learns Tai Chi without engaging the inner Dao and learning and thinking and the self discipline to learn to integrate the "dao" and "chi" from meditation into the movements. So, it becomes public park group exercise taken out of context. But, that is another matter.
A good lst step is to only lightly read about the basics of Buddhism, just what the Buddha taught or spoke about without heavy interpretation by "experts". Think of it as a philosophy of clarity and skip the theology and dogma and institutionalization part. It should fit on 1 page.
A good second step is to do both still (seated or other) and active meditation as taught by a traditional teacher in a cultural context. (not westernized) (not intellectualized) (not New Age feel good.....awkward phrase here). So, Zen meditation, or Chan.
A good third step is to apply #1 and #2 to something that has movement. Tai Chi, Chi Kung, etc. in a traditional setting as taught traditionally in a cultural context. (not westernized. Not intellectualized. No reinterpreted).
The goal is to take the same mental, emotional, and "self" clarity, (taken out of one's artifical ego and identity construct) from sitting still in a safe and still place (IE: zen temple, dojo, etc) to motion of the body (walking meditation (Thich Nhat Hanh addresses this as "mindfullness". but it is more than that).
Then, the next goal is to apply that to a mental and emotional and "spiritual (awkward)" state while living in daily life, while swimming in the cloudy dirty swiming pool consciousness of daily living.
Metaphorically: the ancient term "chop wood, carry water" happens here.
books by the Dalai Lama and Thich Nhat Hanh
It's tough to translate all of this in a simple way without misinterpretation. I hope it is helpful.