Autism Social/Support Group opportunity

[sidd851]

Hi, Fam.
The other day, I had a chance encounter with a MH Caseworker from the local community center.
I asked whether there was a social/support group for those with Autism/Asperger's.
She said no, but quickly expressed enthusiasm for the idea, suggesting that if I were to form such a group, that I would have the full financial, material, logistic, and moral support of the organization that she represents, as well as relative autonomy, essentially giving me carte blanche to do... whatever!
After (over)thinking about this, I've pretty much come to the conclusion that I should make the attempt.
I can't get around the idea that it is an interesting, if not wonderful, opportunity, for any number of reasons.

My goal would be to create a safe, comfortable, friendly, relaxing but interesting, pressure-free and self-directing social outlet for those(of us) that would avoid or shun outlets that are normal for "regular" people, but might be a bit much, or too demanding, for those on the spectrum.

Maybe I'm a bit "over-hopeful", but,
"Of the Autists, by the Autists, for the Autists" has a nice ring to it.

I wish to (over)think this thoroughly.

Sooo...
I'm coming to you, my family, to ask for your opinions, observations, suggestions, concerns, experiences, cautions, etc.

If you're thinking it, or want to say it, or even don't want to say it,
I want to hear it.

Lastly, I want to say that I'm blessed and thankful to have you.
Thank you.

May you, each and every one, be well.

sidd

 

[Pats]

Wow! I think it's exciting. I had to look and remind myself where you live - whether or not you were anywhere close. Keep us posted on how it goes. Also be patient - it may take a little time to get the word out, but if there's nothing like that in the area, I'm sure it will be quite a success. And I believe you will successfully head up the meetings and get them going.

 

[Major Tom]

Sounds like a good opportunity, I say form a plan and go with it! Good luck!

 

[Fino]

Sounds like it's going to be great!

The name sounds like "Of the artists, by the artists, for the artists," said in a British or other similar accent. Not that it's bad, but if I were to attend, that's the first thing I'd say, probably over and over, telling each person I meet LOL I'd do the accent and say "see?" and they'd get uncomfortable and eventually I'd yell, "c'mon, it's funny!"

I feel like this has actually happened now.

 

[SusanLR]

With the help of a psychologist, I tried to get an Asperger's social/support group started 2 yrs ago.
In a building only a few blocks away from the ARC, a social group for lower functioning autistics
thinking it would be a good area for a place for the higher functioning on the spectrum.
We advertised, put out fliers and one person showed.
He never came back.

I think it is a great idea.
Maybe just not enough Aspies in the area here.

 

[sidd851]

With the help of a psychologist, I tried to get an Asperger's social/support group started 2 yrs ago.
In a building only a few blocks away from the ARC, a social group for lower functioning autistics
thinking it would be a good area for a place for the higher functioning on the spectrum.
We advertised, put out fliers and one person showed.
He never came back.

I think it is a great idea.
Maybe just not enough Aspies in the area here.

Alas, that's one of my concerns.
I'll have to rely on fliers and word of mouth.
Perhaps a few hints to the right counselors and therapists might help.
I don't want to get my hopes up, but,
I think, I have to try.
Thank you, SusanLR, for relating your experience, and your encouragement.

 

[Progster]

I'm coming to you, my family, to ask for your opinions, observations, suggestions, concerns, experiences, cautions, etc.

I don't have experience with this kind of thing, but I did once meet up with a couple of people on the spectrum. They were nice people, but they were very verbose and spent most of the time talking about computer software amongst themselves, and I couldn't join in. I felt excluded, and that would be my concern in starting a group: how to organise it so that it would suit everybody and nobody would feel excluded. If I were to go to a group, that would worry me, that they would all talk about video games or something else that I have no knowledge or interest in. I would basically have the same issues there as I would have for an NT group. The best thing to do perhaps, would be to organise an activity that everyone could join in, such as board games or a trip to the cinema, or visit to a museum perhaps.

 

[SusanLR]

I don't have experience with this kind of thing, but I did once meet up with a couple of people on the spectrum. They were nice people, but they were very verbose and spent most of the time talking about computer software amongst themselves, and I couldn't join in. I felt excluded, and that would be my concern in starting a group: how to organise it so that it would suit everybody and nobody would feel excluded. If I were to go to a group, that would worry me, that they would all talk about video games or something else that I have no knowledge or interest in. I would basically have the same issues there as I would have for an NT group. The best thing to do perhaps, would be to organise an activity that everyone could join in, such as board games or a trip to the cinema, or visit to a museum perhaps.

That was how I advertised it would be.
A place to play games, go to the cinema or a park.
Have a few times of organised talk like we do here. Q&A about autism, share experiences.
If enough people had joined, I'm sure, as with any group, each would find someone else that had
shared interests and get to know each other.
A Socrates Cafe type group philosophy day maybe once a month would get everyone involved in thought
and discussion.
Unfortunate that it failed to happen.

 

[sidd851]

how to organise it so that it would suit everybody and nobody would feel excluded.

Admittedly, to achieve any degree of success, this has to be priority one.
I would want everyone to feel welcome and at ease.
I've considered possibly a small variety of activities, and possibly a group discussion
and direction period---all as informal and friendly and unpressured as possible.
I think that it's greatest chances of success lie in letting members choose the direction and activities they would like for themselves--- and alternative activities for those that didn't want to participate in the "mainstream". I tend to think that the
"alternates" might be the key to cohesion.
Maybe regular intervals of breaks and the ability to change, or quit activities, maybe even a quiet room and/or a quiet discussion room. Heck, I'm winging this! But I think it
might be a good idea. Isolation, and even loneliness seem to be common themes, among us. Maybe, just maybe, it doesn't have to be that way, and this idea might bring a little joy, and something to look forward to, into someone's life.
I've made more connections here, than
elsewhere in my life. In this short time, I've
come to appreciate this community greatly.
If in any small way, I can bring that experience to others, well, I gotta try.
Thank you , for your experience and ideas, Progster.

 

[sidd851]

That was how I advertised it would be.
A place to play games, go to the cinema or a park.
Have a few times of organised talk like we do here. Q&A about autism, share experiences.
If enough people had joined, I'm sure, as with any group, each would find someone else that had
shared interests and get to know each other.
A Socrates Cafe type group philosophy day maybe once a month would get everyone involved in thought
and discussion.
Unfortunate that it failed to happen.

Our thoughts are running quite similarly, here. I like the variability and variety you describe--- it sounds great. I envision something very like this--- wherein after establishment, I could fade into the membership, and let the group run itself.
To listen to your ideas fills me with hope and excitement, and I'm truly sorry it didn't come to fruition, for you.
It may turn out the same here, but I'll carry your vision into my attempt.
It's a good and noble vision.

 

[Progster]

It would be a good idea to create a timetable or monthly program, so people will know what activities are planned and which day in advance.

 

[tree]

I think checking out Montessori method of education
would be useful in developing a plan/program/approach.

---
Groups don't run themselves.
Unless you mean there would be a steering committee.

 

[the_tortoise]

wherein after establishment, I could fade into the membership, and let the group run itself.

You may overestimate the ability or inclination of people to organize themselves....

It may be necessary for one person to always act as facilitator, however minimally; Like to remind people to throw out ideas and then vote on the next meeting's activity (if you choose meeting by meeting, for example), or to make sure that each task that needs overseeing (booking space for meetings or activities, updating a calendar, etc.) has a responsible person attached to it.....especially over time as members may come and go.

 

[Mia]

I would likely go to a autism meetup if it included games like chess, backgammon and scrabble. That way I could concentrate on the games, and there would be less need to communicate with others as much.

 

[Pats]

You have lots of thoughts and ideas. I've never been to a support group, but I'm thinking a group of people like me that needs a leader and I think you'll be an excellent leader/guide. A possible suggestion - because I would be nervous about mentioning a topic - maybe have a suggestion box that people could write down topics they would like to discuss and drop them in the box for next time. I think that would also help bring out those really quiet people.
Oh wait! I did take my daughter to some Step One meetings - teenagers and parents alcohol/drug rehab. I'd get so frustrated because the guy in charge did nothing really and was always allowing the conversation to tilt to the positives of alcohol, pot and other drugs. There was one meeting that each of the kids were to write a paper on the drug of their choice and share it with everyone. This one kid wrote a paper on all the positive aspects of pot and the instructor just sat there. Keep in mind this is a meeting to convince the kids they need to stay away from this stuff. So when this kid finished and the leader praised his work I spoke up and asked the kid - I was a nurse and, say, I worked in the emergency room where he were to come in with a great deal of pain and life threatening injury. I had just come back from lunch where I had smoked a joint. Would he want me to be the one treating him? He said no. Point made.
I think it's important to have someone in charge who has an actual interest in the group and the outcome of the meetings and, from your comments here, think you are just that person.
Do you have a time in which you plan to start your first meeting? And IF that first meeting ends up being one or two people, don't stop there and get that other person interested in possibly helping as the group grows.

 

[Pats]

I would likely go to a autism meetup if it included games like chess, backgammon and scrabble. That way I could concentrate on the games, and there would be less need to communicate with others as much.

Jigsaw puzzles is relaxing and people working on them together talk without feeling pressured to talk.

 

[Kirsty]

I would go if there was a pool/snooker table.

 

[LucyPurrs]

Sounds great. Recommend you blanket all mental health and primary care providers and all agencies which deal with autistics with your flyers. Maybe even Adult Services for the County as they may know of shut ins. The hardest part may be getting enough people to start a group. Having done group work before, if you could get 5-6 people to start it might fly. Wish you all the best in doing this. Keep us posted on how it goes.

 

[Cactus]

I've looked for just such a place where I live. There is none. I applaud your activism.

 

[Autistamatic]

I recently joined such a group and it was a worthwhile move. The group I have started to attend is organised by 2 guys but there is no formality to it, no chairperson or predefined structure. We meet on 3 weeks out of 4, usually in a quiet pub and an activity is planned but not mandatory. Last one I went to was a board game night but only about half of the 15 or so Aspies attending participated. Last week the group went for a meal and bowling to celebrate someone's birthday but I didn't go to that one. I just signed up to go to their Christmas meal which is being paid for by the NAS charity.
It's very pleasant to be amongst a group of people you have absolutely no need to mask with. It's also great to get talking to others who get where you're coming from and share experiences. It's a bit like this community but in person.
I think it's a great idea to start a group like this in your area Sidd. It may take a little while to get off the ground but if you succeed it could be a great way for people to let their hair down and just be themselves. For what it's worth I found out about my local group via an article on a local newspaper website.
Edit: I just found the article that put me on to the existence of the group
Group to tackle loneliness in autism community