Asperger's and difficulty with authority figures

[Mia]

Much of my life from early on has involved difficulties with any sort of authority figure. Teachers, older siblings, bosses, have given me no end of grief over the years. My Father had the same sorts of difficulties and perceptions in his life.

I understood ethical and moral behavior as a child, as the rules of society. You shouldn't kill others, or steal, these sorts of edicts made logical sense. Everything else that was to come later made less sense. I argued about social rules with everyone ad infinitum. I saw little point in many of the things I perceived as making no sense. Apparently, I'm not alone in my perceptions.


Asperger’s Syndrome and Difficulty with Authority Figures
Eileen Bailey Health Guide May 25, 2012
One of the most confusing aspects of Asperger’s syndrome (AS) is the strict adherence to rules but, at the same time, having a disrespect or unwillingness to accept authority figures. On one hand, Aspies are known for always wanting to follow the rules and, in some cases, calling out other students who do not follow classroom rules. On the other hand, they often question or refuse to follow rules or even accept that teachers and other authority figures have the right to create rules.

Balance of the article here:
http://www.healthcentral.com/autism/c/1443/153287/asperger-difficulty/

 

[umbrellabeach]

Yup, I've struggled against authority figures all my life, especially ones who bullied me and forced me to participate in meaningless (and overstimulating) activities that I didn't understand.
Let it be henceforth known that doing those things had NO lasting impact on me - except my lifelong hatred of them!

 

[Progster]

I've always had an issue with rules that made no practical sense to me, such as school uniform: having to wear a tie which has no pratical value, or not being able to wear a necklace which poses no danger either to my self or to anyone else. Rules just for the sake of rules. Also, I intensely like rules which aren't fair or are discriminatory, such as being asked to pay tax I can't afford to pay. Society often demands that we willingly accept things that we don't understand, or to accept the authority of a person because that's just the way things are, the way things are done, but I've never been able to do that: I can't just blindly accept things that are unfair, don't make any sense, or just because that's how things are, I don't see why I should have to.

 

[UpAllNightReading]

Yes, I've always had a deep, deep distrust of authority figures, as I've found too many of them abuse that authority. I've always thought that anyone in a position of authority needs to earn the trust of anyone under their authority, not the other way around.

 

[malortie]

What is covered in this thread speaks and accurately describes one of my traits.

Indeed, I too had difficulty accepting things that seem more like excuses to follow the way society works. Most of the people who bear this same analytical probably heard these lines at least once : it is made like that and will stay so; That's how life is...

Whenever presented to a particular subject, I make sure to understand every single bit of it and if something is not clear, I search around internet, mostly Wikipedia, to find the answers that will answer my questions. I hardly take anything for granted.

During my academic route, I faced myself many times being warned by teachers since I had trouble sticking to the objectives that were given since I believed I had a different way of achieving the same result. Why not? Because this is not how the class is meant to be taught. Instead, you would do step 1,2,3 until you reach a result, then repeat the same process until...

I am very opened to criticism, and I enjoy sharing my opinion with others. What causes me to dislike debating is when people deliberately use these kind of excuses/invalid arguments to try to "prove" a point.

I feel some actions are useless and not necessary to achieve a goal, but some people still make a few extra steps without questioning themselves whether or not these steps are needed.

This is sad, since most of this academic system wishes to have more "thinkers" than "doers", but thinking outside the box requires more than just knowledge of following the steps.

 

[updownrightleft]

Yes, because my brain require to understand the reason for things. Especially if those things impact me. I think it's less relevant whether an authority figure is the source, rather it has to do with lack of information and/or unwillingness to share it (by the person). It's more a frustration due to uncontrolled power, and that the wielder's decision is not elaborated in detail.

That's my subjective view. It's not the person, but his secrecy and/or unwillingness to be influenced by me.

 

[Aspergirl4hire]

Yes, I've always had a deep, deep distrust of authority figures, as I've found too many of them abuse that authority. I've always thought that anyone in a position of authority needs to earn the trust of anyone under their authority, not the other way around.

Couldn't have said it better myself. I love your avatar. Welcome to AC!

 

[Omega]

This thread reminds me of Lord Acton.

" Power tends to corrupts, and absolute power corrupts absolutely. Great men are almost always bad men."

 

[Bro'Freak]

Had to bite my tongue last week when I was accused of fraud in a Job Club. I'd basically followed a link to a job vacany with Network 3, but the local authorities web server had blocked 3's website..? So I took note of the contact number to tell them that they might want to unblock that site. As I was speaking to the Techi one of the advisers said I was commiting fraud by phoning them up...? lol fraud using my own phone?.. wtf? Anyway took no notice, finished the chat with the Techi & commented that this country is becoming more like China every week. She said she's never seen anything like it in all her years. So I commented that she hasn't seen anything yet. But boy was I riled she said we were basically employees ( Used a different word ) which I responded to with in a deep tone that I was here to take advantage of their services & that there was no other way I was going to be pigeonholed in that way.
Wish I could remember the word she used to categorise our position.

 

[SocOfAutism]

I don't see how anyone could be comfortable obeying rules that don't make sense, but lots of people are. There are people that like it even.

I'm NT, but I also really struggle with authority. I've been a boss myself and I'm a mom, but I'm more of a motivational authority. If I have to put my foot down, I always explain why and tell the other person that I understand and respect their point of view. I don't get it when other people don't act like this in authority, and I fundamentally don't want to do anything they say. I fall back on simply saying okay and then doing whatever I think is best anyway.

This is a huge problem for many adults, including me. If something is wrong, I just can NOT make myself do it.

 

[The Penguin]

I always struggle with authority figures most of my life. There people don’t agree with me when I’m willing to standup for myself with someone haves a very high role. I don’t give a dam about the person role. If they treat me wrong, I will stand up for myself. I find there to many people in the world allow authority figures to push themselves around.

 

[The Penguin]

I've always had an issue with rules that made no practical sense to me, such as school uniform: having to wear a tie which has no pratical value, or not being able to wear a necklace which poses no danger either to my self or to anyone else.

I find the world stress to much about dress code. To me as long the person is not wearing inappropriate clothing such as something causes hate discrimination, extremely sexual appealing clothing, etc in a public settings, then it should not matter what the person wears. Despite I'm atheist, I do find it nice the church down the street does not force people to wear fancy clothing for the service.

 

[Mia]

"Communication deficits may mean people at work have difficulty understanding the person with Aspergers syndrome, and problems with authority figures are common when difficult, tense relations with bosses and supervisors develop. They may focus on details so much and have such a high degree of perfection, that they cannot tolerate any shortcomings in other employees."
http://www.autism-help.org/aspergers-syndrome-adults.htm

 

[Rhymer]

I've always had an issue with authority figures. It started at school and has continued through my life. I suppose it is mainly
due to the teachers and bosses I've had have been some of the biggest f**king idiots to walk this earth but having Aspergers didnt help with how I dealt with them.

 

[Xenocity]

I never had an issue with authority figures as whole.
If I had an issue, it was with that person specifically... not with their authority.

 

[Bellatrix]

I think the extent to which I have a problem with someone who is in a position above me is directly correlated to their competence within the specific post they hold. All too often in the past I had to wonder if my boss, teacher or supervisor had even been trained properly for the task(s) they were meant to perform, and it didn't help my career prospects to inform them they were incompetent. If, on the other hand, the person I end up working for actually knows what they are doing (which is rarer than one might think), then as long as we stay out of each other's way things will work out well.

Having rules simply for the sake of having them makes no sense to me either, and I will generally not recognise them. For example, where I live (Victoria) the speed limits are often set at a ridiculously low figure (ex. 40 kph) in order to catch motorists speeding, and thus raise revenue for the state in the form of fines. They say it's all about 'saving lives', but as anyone who knows anything at all about reality will be able to tell you, it isn't going at a fast velocity that kills people, but being so negligent as to hit something (like a pedestrian) that does the job. As far as I am concerned, road conditions (ex. wet surface due to rain) should have more to do with how fast one travels, than a number set by some cloistered bureaucrat who doesn't even drive because he has a chauffeur to do that for him.

 

[Crossbreed]

I am okay with the right of authority to speak to their domain. (That is one less responsibility that I have to concern myself with.) But don't try to micro-manage me. For bosses, tell me what you want me to accomplish. Tell me what constraints/parameters you want me to comply with and watch me go to town. (Historical information on the project [what worked/what failed], if available, is helpful, too.)

There is a saying among programmers: Do you want Robust, Fast or Inexpensive? Pick any two.

 

[Ste11aeres]

Having rules simply for the sake of having them

I came across the following interesting blog reflection on Bureaucracy
http://www.onmysoapboxx.com/

 

[Todd Gilbey]

Much of my life from early on has involved difficulties with any sort of authority figure. Teachers, older siblings, bosses, have given me no end of grief over the years. My Father had the same sorts of difficulties and perceptions in his life.

I understood ethical and moral behavior as a child, as the rules of society. You shouldn't kill others, or steal, these sorts of edicts made logical sense. Everything else that was to come later made less sense. I argued about social rules with everyone ad infinitum. I saw little point in many of the things I perceived as making no sense. Apparently, I'm not alone in my perceptions.


Asperger’s Syndrome and Difficulty with Authority Figures
Eileen Bailey Health Guide May 25, 2012
One of the most confusing aspects of Asperger’s syndrome (AS) is the strict adherence to rules but, at the same time, having a disrespect or unwillingness to accept authority figures. On one hand, Aspies are known for always wanting to follow the rules and, in some cases, calling out other students who do not follow classroom rules. On the other hand, they often question or refuse to follow rules or even accept that teachers and other authority figures have the right to create rules.

Balance of the article here:
Autism & Asperger's Center

To be fair, we are surrounded by people who are mostly idiots, especially those who are suspect to having an uncle and a father being the same person if you get my drift? It also does not help being in the UK where we're an isolated island who have bred idiots God knows when. It's only understandable that us "Aspies" who lose patients with people who don't think in the logical way we do. I've worked at a few jobs where my managers were complete dickheads - almost constantly I have these fantasies of making sure those people lose their jobs, fall into despair and eventually do society a favour by jumping off a tall building - and all that being because of me...which makes me smile. That way they can suffer in the same way as I do.

Doing something in a certain way because its "company policy" when you can think of a more effective & logical way of doing something is just bollox personally - we should be embracing autonomy, not stifling it. Until there is a wide-spread understand of this, us aspies will continue to be up against arrogant and ignorant arses who we're inclined to call "managers".

 

[Todd Gilbey]

I don't see how anyone could be comfortable obeying rules that don't make sense, but lots of people are. There are people that like it even.

I'm NT, but I also really struggle with authority. I've been a boss myself and I'm a mom, but I'm more of a motivational authority. If I have to put my foot down, I always explain why and tell the other person that I understand and respect their point of view. I don't get it when other people don't act like this in authority, and I fundamentally don't want to do anything they say. I fall back on simply saying okay and then doing whatever I think is best anyway.

This is a huge problem for many adults, including me. If something is wrong, I just can NOT make myself do it.

That's exactely what I do, just tell them dickhead whose Mummy told them they were the "most special person on earth" what they want to hear, and do what you think is best... x