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Anyone Else Feel like Their Mind Was Wasted?

I wonder what it is that people imagine as the purpose of life when they mean "wasted." Something capitalistic? A wasted life is an unkind life. Start being loving and you certainly haven't wasted anything.
 
My mind, my talents, and my whole life, were nothing but a waste. When I die no one will remember me, or see me as a worthless individual who had no life. My drawings and stories will be left to gather dust or destroyed like garbage when they empty out my apartment. I get no real pleasure from them anymore. I get no real pleasure from anything.
 
I went for music instead of science in high school. Only realized later that it wasn't the smartest choice i could have made, for developing my intelligence, and for having broader work opportunities.

But my high school class was great. My social life was pretty awesome. Mostly everybody was weird in their own way, and there were all sorts of talents in my class. I didn't even get any opportunity to feel smarter than 90% of my class, because there were too many different ways to be smart.

I'm not sure what a waste of mind really is. My brain still works even though I never became a math genius type of genius. It just works on other things, which don't stand out as much. Until someone asks a question about grammar. Pretty much only happens in language classes, so I hardly ever stand out.
 
I certainly had some wasted years, but I could only recognize them as such in hindsight. That being said, I don't think anything is finally wasted until your mind starts to degenerate at old age. I have learned to write only as an adult, and now I have published a few books. I only got a drivers' license for buses at 27, and now I drive a mobile library. I only started at uni at 28, and I am determined to make a master's degree before 40. I have read of people who entered their profession at late 40s and proceeded to revolutionize their field.

What this kind of thing does require though, is sheer arrogance. The pig headed decision to push yourself at some people, even if your skill is not yet up to it, and simply decide to learn necessary skills as you go.

EDIT: Admittedly, this also requires time and money that some people don't have. I paid for my education from my own pocket. The drivers' license certainly wasn't cheap. So just to make clear I don't think it's all about guts and personal features. That is a requirement, but not all that is needed.
 
I often wonder about this. When I was younger, in the midst of a complete breakdown (burnout?) I could barely even do basic math, and I felt so useless and wasted. But now that I'm older, have gotten most of my mind back and have accomplished a fair bit more and gained more experience, I don't feel that way so much anymore.

I don't know if being diagnosed sooner would have helped me. It's possible it could have harmed me, if I'd been pushed into harmful therapies or held back because I was seen as "special" or less capable. On the other hand, I wish I'd known sooner so I could manage better.

I've come to the conclusion that it's a coin flip...I really don't know what would have happened if I had been diagnosed sooner - and what's important, what I can do something with, is the fact that I know now and can use that knowledge and understanding to live my best life.
 
No, I don’t feel like my mind had been wasted. I have been a piano technician for 25 years (started my apprenticeship in 1995). I have been working for myself for 20 years.

I don’t advertise, I don’t have a website. My business has been built on doing quality work and being able to identify and fix problems other technicians can’t.

There is a lot of problem solving to do with pianos. There are thousands of parts that each need to function correctly in order for a piano to work properly. It is delicate and accurate work. It keeps my mind engaged and active.

I feel very privileged to work in such a specific field that is constantly challenging me to figure out solutions to problems.

The best part is customer satisfaction. I’ve had clients ready to get rid of an older piano because it wasn’t playing properly, and then you fix it and bring joy back to them as they can play their instruments again.

I am very good at what I do.
 
My father works in a dead end job and so do I. He AND I could write for the Atlantic if we wanted. Do any of you feel like this?!? Just bc you autistic you are just..well...hopeless?? Just curious.....

I definitely feel that way. If you're feeling depressed about it, keep in mind there are billions of people in poor countries doing low wage, low skill jobs, dead end jobs many of whom probably could have had much better jobs if only they were lucky enough to have been born in a wealthier country. I'm sure those billions of people would love to have the dead end job you and your father have and be eternally grateful if they were able to get it.
 

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