36 and still feeling like I did when I was 17.

[Markness]

Can you describe a few instances of that happening?

Or so far is it all *potential*?

When I asked Jennifer and Serena for their numbers. There was also when I would go to Austin for speed dating and paid $100 for a dating service.

 

[tree]

OK.
You asked a couple people for their numbers.
And you went for speed dating and tried a dating service.

How would you rate these activities as far as building a base
for further activities? Feel ok about them? Useful steps?

 

[Markness]

OK.
You asked a couple people for their numbers.
And you went for speed dating and tried a dating service.

How would you rate these activities as far as building a base
for further activities? Feel ok about them? Useful steps?

I thought they would lead somewhere but they ended up being unproductive.

 

[tree]

I thought they would lead somewhere but they ended up being unproductive.

How did that add to your store of information?

To me it sounds like superficial *hey hiya wanna go out* encounters
are an unlikely propellant for meaningful friendships.

 

[Markness]

How did that add to your store of information?

To me it sounds like superficial *hey hiya wanna go out* encounters
are an unlikely propellant for meaningful friendships.

I thought that was getting out of my so-called comfort zone and “putting myself out there” as I’ve often been told I needed to do.

 

[tree]

*putting yourself out there* and stepping out of one's
comfort zone are getting to be a couple phrases that
I am growing tired of. I know they're meant to be
encouraging, but they feel superficial, like a person is
a canned vegetable displayed on a shelf.

You've often said that conversations *fizzle out.*
As trivial as it may sound, playing some of the games
on this forum make for useful practice in responding
to another person and continuing an exchange of
words.

 

[FeatherBird]

OP, I mentioned on a past post that I'm close in age to you (33), yet feel like I haven't progressed much since I was a teen.

I might as well elaborate.

My phobia of doing an askout (in other words, putting myself out there) was something I had as a teen that I still have now.

I'm stuck in a continuous negative feedback loop where I'm so petrified a woman I know might reject me that I only ask out strangers (who really do reject me)

So I guess I've progressed in a small way since I was a teen. As a teen, I would have been too scared to ask out anyone. At least now, I'm comfortable asking out strangers. Still, my phobia of asking out those I actually know is preventing me from living a full life.