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Metalhead

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  • Off to bed I go. I wish I could sleep eternally. Last night I had a dream where I went to college and was a straight A student working his ass off. That will never happen for me now.
    I would have been worth more to my family and the world around me if I were a miscarriage, born dead.
    Aspychata
    Aspychata
    Okay you are making me feel bad about existing.
    Metalhead
    Metalhead
    You contribute to the world. You deserve to exist:
    Should I stick around and continue to annoy everybody around me without fail? Should I stick around and continue to disappoint myself and everybody around me? Heh.
    IXxTchxXI
    IXxTchxXI
    Dont live for others, live for yourself

    Don't worry about other people's opinion's, in the end they don't matter

    Also, you dont annoy me, I enjoy seeing your posts and seeing you around

    My DM is always open if you need to vent, I'm not very good at advice but am very good at listening

    I believe in you

    ~💜🖤
    I am thinking of watching Gaspar Noe’s Irreversible tonight. Even though the final scenes break me into a puddle of tears every time I watch it.
    Pride month is here. I’m thinking of starting a pseudo-religious anti-cigarette campaign and calling it *God Hates Fags.* I am reclaiming that hate speech.
    Now that I am clearing my mind of resentments, I need to find something better to occupy my mind in idle time.
    I feel like writing a private vent journal and then lighting it on fire.
    Rodafina
    Rodafina
    That might be very cathartic. I've done something similar and it helped.
    I accept that my family will always look at me with ableism in their eyes. I can grieve but I must let this go and move on.
    I pulled weeds for a while in my gravel yard. It looks so much better now. I will finish this job tomorrow as it is too warm outside to finish it now.
    I have repetitive thoughts on resentments and grudges that I need to let go. I choose to let it go for a while but I always pick them back up later and I need to stop doing that.
    Rodafina
    Rodafina
    Maybe the period of time that you let it go will slowly get longer and longer until the resentments and grudges are actually gone.
    Jonn
    Jonn
    Negative thoughts influence your emotions. I am assuming you know that. When I start getting in a negativity rut, I try to snap out of it by going to a psychological "happy place" or simply focusing on my breathing.
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