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Tony Ramirez

Tony Ramirez

V.I.P Member
Alone Aspie grapples fear of unlove and rejection 48 From Brooklyn, NY
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  • Tony Ramirez
    Sorry about being so negative lately but it really hurt last week when that woman approached me and I thought the conversation was going good until she mentioned a boyfriend then showed me his picture. That really hurt me.
    tree
    tree
    You let it hurt you.
    Tony Ramirez
    Tony Ramirez
    It still hurts bad. It's even worse now being around couples. I'm at church now and it's torture. I'm about to lose it.
    Tony Ramirez
    I should have died during my emergency surgery when I was two years old instead of suffering these 44 years after.
    View previous comments…
    A
    Aspiecats
    Have you identified what it is you want out of having a relationship? Even with your sad picture there you don't appear to be unattractive. Believe me a partner isn't the answer, unless you know yourself. There are so many people out there looking for companions but can't find the right fit. That is why you need to know what you want from them and what they want from you.
    S
    Steelbookcollector217
    What was the emergency surgery for?
    Tony Ramirez
    Tony Ramirez
    Could not breathe.
    Tony Ramirez
    I'm at the point of my life where I have a much better chance of winning the lottery then finding a partner.
    A
    Aspiecats
    Then play the lottery, it may be the answer if you win. I have found that many partner options come available if they see $ signs.
    Tony Ramirez
    I'm getting to the tipping point in telling people I meet what I really think of them.
    View previous comments…
    Tony Ramirez
    Tony Ramirez
    No it would be negative for all the payback of them rubbing in their happiness in my face.
    tree
    tree
    This idea that people are intentionally torturing you by being happy-----
    please discuss this with your therapist.
    Tony Ramirez
    Tony Ramirez
    I am going to. I will try.
    Tony Ramirez
    There is a 1% chance the next new woman I talk to around my age or younger I have a actual conversation with will be single.
    View previous comments…
    tree
    tree
    So you've got each encounter written down and tabulated?
    Tony Ramirez
    Tony Ramirez
    I use to keep a anxiety scale and 9 and 10s were encounters with single women but many turned into 5s which is couples and 5M married, 5BF boyfriend. So after awhile I stopped doing it.
    tree
    tree
    Yes, I remember that.

    The problem with that personal score keeping/your research method is
    the size of the sample is too small.
    Tony Ramirez
    I been so sick the past few days I have not been able to go to church or yoga. Won't be able to see my therapist tomorrow or hang out with my lifegroup for dinner tomorrow. When I get better everything will be closed and people will be away.
    tree
    tree
    Can't do therapist session on the phone?
    Tony Ramirez
    Tony Ramirez
    I hope they can do it on the phone if they still do it otherwise I will have to see her on Friday
    Tony Ramirez
    Just today at the social I meet a new woman and she has a boyfriend. She showed me his stupid picture. I am stick of 99% of women being taken. I will never be in a relationship. It sucks no matter what I do or where I go women are all in relationships.
    Tony Ramirez
    What's the point to even attempt to try to ask out a woman I like when there is a 99% chance she has a boyfriend or a husband.
    Judge
    Judge
    If you feel that way, perhaps the most logical question is why you don't move on and concentrate on pursuing things as an individual as opposed to a couple?

    Think about it. Whatever it is that prevents you from the obvious needs to be addressed and overcome. Which is likely to be more attainable in comparison. Where you can always readdress pursuing a relationship later.
    Tony Ramirez
    Tony Ramirez
    When I see couples everywhere outside and most of my friends in relationships it's kind of hard to not think and want to be in one.
    Tony Ramirez
    Dispite my autism and major phobias I have really socialized and did so many things these past over 4 1/2 years I feel like I accomplished so much and made an impact in people's life's. I do feel sad I am still not in a relationship.
    Rodafina
    Rodafina
    It’s nice to hear about some of your accomplishments that you see, Tony. Even if you haven’t gotten everything that you want in life just yet.
    Tony Ramirez
    Women who talk to me have been saying to me that I have lost a lot of weight. However, I still look overweight.
    View previous comments…
    Forest Cat
    Forest Cat
    I agree with Metalhead. And losing weight is not easy, it shows willpower and determination. Very positive things.
    UberScout
    UberScout
    Dude. You've GOT to see my full body pic rn. I lost like 20 something lbs recently and I still look like an upright walrus.
    Tony Ramirez
    Tony Ramirez
    I do notice my face is thinner from the pictures taken in the summer. I even was told that facial has gotten thinner. Also was told belly fat is the hardest to lose.
    Tony Ramirez
    Have you ever texted the wrong person? I just have. Thank goodness it was just a text about my yoga schedule.
    Forest Cat
    Forest Cat
    Yeah I have done that. It can be unfortunate.
    MildredHubble
    MildredHubble
    Yep! Fortunately it was nothing too embarrassing except for a lot of kisses at the end of the message. I said the recipient could keep them if they wanted to :-)
    Tony Ramirez
    I don't want to end my life next year. What was I thinking. Dispite my family. I have a lot of friends and people who care for me.
    M
    Misty Avich
    Glad to hear.
    Rodafina
    Rodafina
    Feelings are always changing, Tony. It good to see that you can push through some of the really negative ones and get to a more hopeful place. The bad feelings may come back, but remember that they will pass.
    M
    Misty Avich
    I was worried about you, Tony.
    Tony Ramirez
    I talked to a woman after yoga class and even walked with her on my way home taking to her. I was not nervous or anything.
    Gerald Wilgus
    Gerald Wilgus
    Good going. Do you have her number? Next time offer an interesting date - and, OMG, there is a lot interesting going on around NYC. Is Sweeny Todd still playing? But, only if you like the macabre. Or, so many museums! And one of the best of Mexican cucina at Toloache (I think it is near 50th and 8th). Sweep her off her feet.
    Tony Ramirez
    Tony Ramirez
    She is married. What a waste of time it was. 99% of the new women I encounter recently have a boyfriend or are married and I am sick of it. New York city has very few single women or they stay in their apartments like hermits.
    Tony Ramirez
    I was told by two people today that I have been a positive influence to them and other people lives. I don't feel so useless now.
    Gerald Wilgus
    Gerald Wilgus
    Now use that little victory for your confidence and feel secure in approaching a single woman you have interacted with and ask her out for something simple, like a cuppa joe. Awww, hell, if the woman is married ask her if she can give you practice in a conversation you can have with a single woman.
    Gerald Wilgus
    Gerald Wilgus
    But, married women may have single girlfriends. You need to cast as wide of a net as you can.
    Tony Ramirez
    My late grandmother said you won't meet anyone if you don't go out. We'll I been going out for over 4 1/2 years and I still have not meet that special someone.
    Misery
    Misery
    Have you tried searching for completely new places to go? If transportation isnt too bad, I mean.
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