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Markness

Markness

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  • Markness
    I’m probably going to die alone and unloved at this rate. :(
    Raggamuffin
    Raggamuffin
    We all die alone. Even if we're in a room full of people, we are the one's departing.

    Learn to love yourself, then work outwards.

    Not easy I know, I'm still trying myself. But I can say this - it does affect relationships in a deep way. I know you crave a relationship with so much energy and focus, but don't treat it like it will be salvation from your struggles.
    Aspychata
    Aspychata
    You can technically be in a relationship and still be unloved. I struggle with that particular. Better to love yourself, and live for you.
    Markness
    I decided to glue the broken tail piece as best as I could and did some more work on Gluttony. The peg to her “knapsack unit” broke due to me, once again, being careless but fortunately the rest of it can still attach to the figure’s upper back.
    5275D6BE-639F-4BF0-A7A5-6178EF0CF7C1.jpeg
    6650E6DC-B0A3-4C00-9F76-8F5F9054E1D7.jpeg
    Rodafina
    Rodafina
    Nice. You tackled a problem and solved it. From here, there are no visible flaws. And a very cool knapsack unit. Can she fly with it?
    Markness
    I know that not everything can be resolved right away but what should I do and or think in the mean time?
    View previous comments…
    Markness
    Markness
    Before I can potentially fix the broken armor piece for Gluttony, what should I think? A part of me feels like I messed up and shouldn’t even own the figure anymore for some odd reason.
    tree
    tree
    Does that sound reasonable to you?
    Is that what you'd advise someone you cared about to think?

    Does telling yourself you don't deserve to have the figure sound like
    anything your parents ever told you, when you were a child?
    Markness
    Markness
    It sounds unreasonable the more I think about it. I wouldn’t say that to anyone, especially if they were in a similar financial situation to me.

    It does sound like something my parents would’ve said.
    Markness
    I really feel sad now. Not just because I broke something when I didn’t mean to but that I am still without someone who loves me and my life feels out of my control.
    Markness
    I feel that I need a break from the Discord server I joined. I deleted the mobile app for it off my phone.
    Gerontius
    Gerontius
    I tried Discord once and lasted about 48 hours. joined a bunch of lefties and attempted hostile takeover of a right-wing nationalist sub. Fun but chaotic.
    tree
    tree
    A break sounds like you've had enough for now, but not like you're
    resolved to give it up altogether. @Markness
    Markness
    I was going to post a photo of my progress on the Gluttony model but I found out too late that my shirtless reflection is showing in the window! How embarrassing!
    tree
    tree
    Are you going to put on a shirt and try again sometime?
    L
    Luca
    Sometimes I do that too, I take a picture of something in my house and then realize I’m just wearing a sports bra or something in a reflection.
    I’m pretty confident about my body, but not that confident. Lol

    Just retake the picture with a shirt on, like tree suggested. Not a big deal. It happens.
    Rodafina
    Rodafina
    Good catch before you posted it, hopefully you try again, because it would be nice to see your progress.
    Markness
    I feel my age weighing on me but apparently it shouldn’t.
    Gerontius
    Gerontius
    You're right. You're doing better than previous-you because you don't have the peer pressure to be "the cool kids." Too old for high-school petty nonsense.
    I think you are becoming a little more sensible as things keep going. Keep working on it & more power to you.
    Markness
    My parents are largely to blame for why romantic love has been denied to me.
    View previous comments…
    tree
    tree
    @Markness

    I know you weren't denying your parents' role in your existence.

    How effective and useful to you have been your attempts, so far, to prove their world views wrong?
    Rodafina
    Rodafina
    Could you shift the focus from their world views to your world views? Disproving another’s world views can be a fruitless path. Discovering your own sounds better to me.
    Aspychata
    Aspychata
    Think Mark ness has boundaries now, and he is more vocal in asking that his boundaries be respected. That's a big step. It's sounds like his mother respects his requests. So a very big change for him.
    Markness
    I am still in many ways the me in 2006 who didn’t have a girlfriend and didn’t know how to establish romance. My life has remained on a loop.
    Tony Ramirez
    Tony Ramirez
    Same here. Except back then I wasted my life in my room doing nothing. Now I am doing things but they are not leading to a thing romantic.
    tree
    tree
    @Markness

    You said "in many ways."
    You didn't say *in every way.*

    So what do you see as (even a little bit) different about the now-you
    compared with the then-you?
    Markness
    Markness
    @tree I can drive myself around, I can see the bands I like that I could only dream of seeing before, and I don’t want to hang with the “cool kids.”
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