Christmas is over, thank God. Now there is just New Year's to get through and then everything will get back to normal.
Ok, here's the deal when it comes to the major holidays, Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Years. These are all family holidays. I live alone. I have no family nearby. This is well known to my co-workers and friends at church. Yet, what do I get asked after each and every holiday? "How was your _____?"
How do they think I spent my holiday? "It was quiet," I tell them and leave it at that. This is what "quiet" means, however. It means that I go 24 hours without any live human contact. The phone does not ring. This Christmas was no different. Nobody called. Not friends, not family.
We talk about authenticity at church but I have learned there are limits to authenticity. It can only go so far. Nobody wants to hear about the kind of Christmas I just described. So I don't describe it.
When the news came out about the attempted firebombing at my trailer park, I did not get any calls or e-mails from my church "family" asking if I was safe. I did get a phone call from my therapist (and it wasn't even my day for therapy!). Ok, maybe they didn't hear the news, so I'll grant them that.
I suppose I could have called my family but it seems every time I call them they are "busy" and "can't talk." So I don't call anymore. I figure they know when they are not busy. I stopped sending cards and gifts a while back. Never got any thank yous. Never heard how they liked what I sent. I know, I know, that sort of thing is so last century. But still, it would be nice to hear once in a while.
Thanksgiving and Christmas and New Year's are just another day off work. That's all they are to me. They don't have any meaning otherwise. Once this would have bothered me but it doesn't any more. There's always wine, if it does.
Because there is always an excuse and it usually starts out something like "Well, you know, you . . ."
Ok, here's the deal when it comes to the major holidays, Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Years. These are all family holidays. I live alone. I have no family nearby. This is well known to my co-workers and friends at church. Yet, what do I get asked after each and every holiday? "How was your _____?"
How do they think I spent my holiday? "It was quiet," I tell them and leave it at that. This is what "quiet" means, however. It means that I go 24 hours without any live human contact. The phone does not ring. This Christmas was no different. Nobody called. Not friends, not family.
We talk about authenticity at church but I have learned there are limits to authenticity. It can only go so far. Nobody wants to hear about the kind of Christmas I just described. So I don't describe it.
When the news came out about the attempted firebombing at my trailer park, I did not get any calls or e-mails from my church "family" asking if I was safe. I did get a phone call from my therapist (and it wasn't even my day for therapy!). Ok, maybe they didn't hear the news, so I'll grant them that.
I suppose I could have called my family but it seems every time I call them they are "busy" and "can't talk." So I don't call anymore. I figure they know when they are not busy. I stopped sending cards and gifts a while back. Never got any thank yous. Never heard how they liked what I sent. I know, I know, that sort of thing is so last century. But still, it would be nice to hear once in a while.
Thanksgiving and Christmas and New Year's are just another day off work. That's all they are to me. They don't have any meaning otherwise. Once this would have bothered me but it doesn't any more. There's always wine, if it does.
Because there is always an excuse and it usually starts out something like "Well, you know, you . . ."
