My plans

I want to meet up with my autistic friend again and get involved with the autism organizations here. But i can't do it with my parents knowing.

I guess i will have to do it without telling them or after they die.

I hope my life would be a full and meaningful one if i do that. I don't know what other thing i can do if i can't do it.

When i am dying i wish i could smile and feel like i am going home to a much better place. Where i can make the person i love happy and live with that feeling of eternity.

I simply can't believe this life is all there is. It's just too depressing and sad to think that way.