wishing for something to take place and when it does, anxiety sets in and wish it was not happening

[Suzanne]

This is what happens to me many times and I find it sooo frustrating. I mean, I really want what ever it is, to take place and yet, when it happens or a chance, I start freaking out and wish it was not happening.

Also, do any of you find it extremely embarrassing when someone talks about you when you are there?

Sometimes, my husband will relate to another, how awful my childhood was, but in front of me and I feel so mortified and have no idea how to behave.


To be honest, when this happens to NT's, Ai note they do see more to take it in their stride. Oh and not that I am angry when my husband does it, for actually, it makes me feel loved by him, but still feel awfully shy and awkward.

 

[Ylva]

It is extremely disrespectful to talk about someone who is there like they are not there. It is just plain rude to tell people things abou you personally without your permission.

 

[Suzanne]

It is extremely disrespectful to talk about someone who is there like they are not there. It is just plain rude to tell people things abou you personally without your permission.

Yes, but my husband is not doing it to be disrespectful, but to show he loves me and, really, it does not offend me, but does embarrass me.

 

[Ylva]

How exactly does embarrassing you say "I love you"?

 

[zurb]

This is what happens to me many times and I find it sooo frustrating. I mean, I really want what ever it is, to take place and yet, when it happens or a chance, I start freaking out and wish it was not happening.

I can relate to this. Its fun dreaming/planning about it, but scary when you realise its actually going to happen.

 

[DogwoodTree]

I mean, I really want what ever it is, to take place and yet, when it happens or a chance, I start freaking out and wish it was not happening.

Also, do any of you find it extremely embarrassing when someone talks about you when you are there?

I feel this way about compliments. I actually want people to think well of me and to recognize when I've done something well...but it feels sooooo uncomfortable when it's happening. Just like I want people to acknowledge my existence in social gatherings or whatever, but then all I want to do is run away when actually faced with it, when someone actually does talk to me or look at me or hug me or worse, like talking about me to other people standing around, no matter what nice things they're saying.

 

[Knit Hat]

How exactly does embarrassing you say "I love you"?

He might not know he's embarrassing her.

 

[Suzanne]

Sorry for not responding before! To Ylva ie to your question. It took me years to even say that I know he loves me; he used to coax me into saying it and I would shyly say and he would go: ah she is getting there! It is due to having extreme low self esteem and never dreamed that I was good enough for marriage! I am tons better now, but even so, when he does it in front of others, it does make me feel bashful and Knit Hat, he does actually, but says that he cannot stop showing his love for me and I have to get used to it. Not so bad in front of others who are married but in front of single ones, I do feel shy!

 

[Vinca]

This is what happens to me many times and I find it sooo frustrating. I mean, I really want what ever it is, to take place and yet, when it happens or a chance, I start freaking out and wish it was not happening.

This happens to me too. I think it is because when I imagine something happening, I am in total control, I know what is going to happen, when and how, because every detail is controlled by my imagination. When something I imagined happening, takes place in reality, I'm not in control in the same way that I was when I imagined it, and I freak out.