Where do you connect with others?

[Sherlock77]

I'm an Aspie but a fairly social one, I know some others struggle with that.

I'm now 45, over the years my first point of connection has been the the church I grew up in, my parents started going there when I was 8 years old and I still go there, being loyal, a typical Aspie trait I'm told or is it fear of change? All the same I know lots of people there.

Also, as I've developed hobbies I have discovered groups who shared my same interests. At one point I had a strong interest in collecting die-cast car models, and there was a group of people (all guys I must confess) who met to show off our collections and just hang out.

I am also now a 10 year member of a local camera club, a large one with almost 200 people, I have managed to connect with some members fairly well, it costs me $70 a year to stay but it's worth it to me.

A few years ago I connected strongly with the local poetry community, I'm no poet but it interested me and at that time I went to lots of different poetry readings and events, even getting involved on the photography end, including being the official paid photographer for a yearly poetry (spoken word) festival.

More recently I have started to hang out on Thursday nights at an open music stage a good friend hosts, the more I go the better I connect with the people there. I'm not a musician but simply enjoy music and have found acceptance of myself there.

My basic strategy over the years, not knowing that I'm an Aspie, has been to find other people with similar interests, sometimes they fell in my lap as well. And for me co-workers have rarely been a source of connection.

What are some of the ways you connect with others? Just trying to encourage other people in the process.

 

[The Penguin]

What are some of the ways you connect with others? Just trying to encourage other people in the process.

This site been a help.

As for my interest, it me joining this doll collecting site 5 days ago. It nice to have a place to share this type of interest because finding this in a open society is not easy. I sure once day I will attend a conference and meet some great people. Also want to attend Lego conference, and well, as many conference as I can relating to my interests.

 

[Sherlock77]

This site been a help.

As for my interest, it me joining this doll collecting site 5 days ago. It nice to have a place to share this type of interest because finding this in a open society is not easy. I sure once day I will attend a conference and meet some great people. Also want to attend Lego conference, and well, as many conference as I can relating to my interests.

Of course this forum too, didn't intentionally leave that out.

One forum I used to hang out at more is British Car Forum, even though I've never owned a British car, let alone a classic, just some great folks...

 

[ZebraAutismo]

I connect well with people with common interests so I have a lot of swimming l, doll and art friends. I also had some friends at school and now collage. A lot of these people are aspires.

 

[Datura]

I go to the local pride centre on a fairly regular basis. There are people who there who I have known for a long time and a general acceptance that people are different. A lot of people who utilize their services do so because they are having trouble coping, so it maybe isn't the best place to meet healthy people, but I have met some great wonderful friends through going there and always feel welcome.

I used to go to tabletop gaming events quite regularly, but haven't for a while because of social anxiety and a shifting focus in my life. I would like to get back into it though as I find gaming to be a very enjoyable pastime. Unfortunately, the relationships I formed through the hobby were very superficial. Even my D&D group of three years were never much more than acquaintances.

I recently started attending a meditation group. The structured discussion is nice, but I find the coffee break portion is overwhelming and awkward and I don't think I have made any meaningful connections there yet.

I do have one friend who is hyper-social and constantly wants to introduce me to her friends. She is a bit much, honestly, but some of her friends are really nice people and I am glad to make their acquaintance.

 

[Tyrantus1212]

I go to meetups, per my parents' suggestion. I've searched for groups via Meetup.com and found one that has a lot of museum meetings on weekends. I can't go for weekdays, I'm too exhausted. I also connect with fellow Aspies on here of course, and fellow gamers through Battle Net.

 

[Momo]

I don't seem to be finding anyone to connect with at the moment, and not for the lack of trying. It's simply the fact that it's hard to find people to connect with regardless of how many places I go to, apparently no one wants to talk to the wee chick at any martial arts centre (historical combat just does it for me), or spar with me, and if they do they won't try too hard. I think they're worried they'll hit me and I'll just shatter into a million tiny peices, it's kind of sweet and annoying all at once. But this forum has been great!

 

[Alaska]

I meet quite a few people on the bus, or waiting at bus stops. Apparently NTs do this deliberately and probably with more success. Even though it has not turned me into a social butterfly, it has helped me make a few friends.

Support groups for other problems besides Aspergers has really been helpful for finding compatible people.

Art classes and other types of contacts connected with art have helped me find some friends.

I joined Toastmasters and met a lot of people through that. I am still thinking about whether they are the right kind of people for me or not. I was feeling close to people I met in SF, but the ones here are a lot more Yuppie than I am, so Aspergers aside, we might not be that compatible. I might just be overwhelmed, though. It is a lot for me to deal with at once.

Churches have helped me meet some nice people, but I get really bent out of shape when a group of church members starts in criticizing members of another church. Sometimes this happens when none of the crtics have even met a member of the group they are criticizing. This probably strikes a raw nerve with me because I have often felt so much like an outsider. Aside from that, it can be pretty nice until the critics get to me too much. Naturally, I leave when that happens.

Sometimes I pray for help finding friends I can be happy with. That seems to work well for me.

 

[Datura]

I meet quite a few people on the bus, or waiting at bus stops. Apparently NTs do this deliberately and probably with more success. Even though it has not turned me into a social butterfly, it has helped me make a few friends.

As a side note; am I the only one who finds the phrase "social butterfly" odd? Of all of the insects out there how did they arrive at butterflies to represent sociability? I would think bees, or ants would be more ideal candidates.