What would you Change/Not Change, about your ASD?

[Aspychata]

I guess as a late speech developmental autie, this poll or thread doesn't apply to me

You are more then welcome to reply, we all learn from each other.

 

[JDShredds]

Since the poll is about "changing" yourself, I don't know if this will be considered amusing or literal... but its intended to be both:

Change? I don't like change.

 

[tducey]

Option 3, overall, for me. Still if I could change 1 thing about myself it would be the ability to drive.

 

[Pats]

Was thinking about all these people who say, 'yes, we're all a little autistic', or 'I do the same thing', or 'that makes everyone uncomfortable', etc, etc. And they say it like it's no big deal. "Sure, everyone gets a little nervous before having to make a speech. It's no big deal."
You try to get across the severity but they don't get that either. But there is one thing that you never hear them say and that's "It makes me feel like I'm from another planet" or that they know they are different than everyone else or no one understands and so on.

Weird things about me that they say that's just me - I like to sleep in my clothes sometimes. I'm extremely shy and have never outgrown it. I don't like girly things. When I do start talking I don't know when to stop. I don't like to try new foods or new things and I eat the same things over and over or watch the same shows over and over or listen to the same songs over and over. I hide. I have to escape. I freeze. I can go on and on. And my family has always known these things about me but it's just who I am and no big deal.

So what they can't see is what I'm feeling or why I do these things. My sister didn't take a shower 2 days in a row so she gets not wanting to take a shower. (though they do make fun of me for not letting my face get wet). They don't know the torture of new things or leaving my comfort zone or small talk. And without understanding what's going on inside of me, how would they know any of this is a big deal and might actually be autism? For one thing - I'm not fine with it all. Some of it drives me crazy and I hate it but can't change it. No, I'm not fine that I don't know how to make friends or keep friends. No, I'm not fine that I can't just decide to drive an hour and visit my kids. No, I'm not fine if I walk into church and someone is sitting in my seat and I have to sit somewhere else and so tense that I leave hurting and with a headache from the tension. But they think I am even when I tell them I'm not.

I'm not saying there is nothing good about autism - there are definite advantages and some things make me very glad I'm autistic. But who here is fine with everything that comes with autism? And what's something you are not fine with and wish you could change?

 

[Progster]

But who here is fine with everything that comes with autism? And what's something you are not fine with and wish you could change?

I'm not fine with the anxiety I have to live with, that my work causes me so much anxiety, or having to do things that involve interaction with people, or things away from home. I'm independent and manage them, but find it stressful and exhausting. That's something that I would change if I could, I'd like to be able to work and interact with people or go about my daily business without anxiety.

Another thing I'm not fine with is how other people dismiss or don't understand my issues because they don't experience them themselves. My partner, for exampe, is sociable and outgoing and can't understand why I find it so hard to approach and talk to people, or why I find some things hard to do. He thinks that because he doesn't have this problem, then I shouln't either. Or sensory issues with sound - he can't understand why I should find it hard to talk when the TV is on, becuase he has no problem talking and listening over background noise. It's not posssible to understand something from another person's perspective if you haven't experienced it yourself. We often experience the world a lot more intensely than other people, and this is what they fail to understand can can't relate to.

 

[Sabrina]

What I want is other people to change, in order to feel accepted. I like myself very much.

 

[Sabrina]

I am unable to participate in your poll, as none of the choices apply to me.

Yes, I am comfortable with myself at this juncture.

A couple, less significant things I'd like to be able to change, if possible, would be my severe lack of wittiness and my inability to decipher sarcasm, whether the result of AS/ASD, or not.

I agree with you, but I feel that whatever I gain, or change, I would lose in another area, like in the movie A Beautiful Mind.

 

[clg114]

Yeah, mine hasn't ended yet either, probably never will.

If you do not grow up by the time you are 70, then you do not have to. When you consider that and the fact that I meet new people & go new places every day, I got it made.

 

[StopDiagnosingPeople]

Everything. Being autistist is the worst thing that you can be. It's so horrible on every level. I hate autism with every fiber of my being and I hate myself for having it. Autism makes me a monster. I just take solice in the knowledge that one day I won't be ausistic, I will be dead.

I'd eliminate autism at any cost. Autism is lack of empathy and humanity. I hate myself for being an autistic monster.

 

[anacrusis]

I'd eliminate autism at any cost. Autism is lack of empathy and humanity. I hate myself for being an autistic monster.

I'm sad that you feel this way - which suggests that autistic people can and do have empathy - I feel that we simply experience it and express it differently, and are more often misunderstood because of that. We can learn to express it in a more neurotypical way, but that costs energy and so is exhausting. I think the changes I'd like to see are not so much to do with autism itself, and more to do with having understanding from those who don't have it. I'm grateful to have discovered a reason for the way I am, as it's the first stage in accepting things about myself which I used to criticise as being weird. When we grow up in a world which is different from us, it's all too easy to accept everyone else's "normal" as being the only valid way to be - it shouldn't be.
The strengths I can bring to the community I live and work in include my attention to detail, problem-solving skills, an ability to approach difficulties in a different way, and pattern-recognition. It'd be great not to feel stressed in social situations, not to be as anxious or as prone to depression, sure - but I'm guessing that there are positives and negatives for everyone, whether they're autistic or NT. So no, for now I'd not change - whilst I might get rid of the bad bits, who's to say it wouldn't also get rid of the positive bits too... ?

 

[Vindicator Phoenix]

I'm very comfortable with my autism, and can't think of anything I'd change, aside from auditory processing.

I've realized that problems arise, due to the incongruity of myself and my society, rather than from any inherent defects.

Think about it. In a society in which autistic people comprised most or all of the population, we'd live easier lives.

 

[tlc]

I say change 1/2 of myself.

I would keep my mechanical abilities and those kind of things.

I would change so I have social abilities, be able to understand and relate to people, not get painfully overwhelmed by social situations.

But then I would have it all, and I don't think that's humanly possible.