Time it takes to Process and Anylize

[Pondering]

So, I realized that sometimes after hearing a piece of information and thinking about the meaning of it, it can take me over three months on average to fully process and anylize to understand what something meant. In other cases, up to several years. I'm like an out-dated computer. When I understand something, I never need another explaination, but trying to understand is beyond slow. It can even be annoying. But at least it us efficient and accurate. But slow. In general, how long does it take you to process most difficult pieces of information? Am I the only one who takes this long to process? What is the longest span of time it has taken you to process the meaning of an event, something said, a face made, etc? Any fast 'processers' here?

 

[Suzanne]

It can take me years, or months or weeks or days, depending on what it is.

My big issue is not thinking quick enough, when put on the spot, however, I can feed off others and retain that and then,if put on the spot, sort of bring up to memory what I heard. Trouble is, doesn't seem to happen twice and I have this terrible urge to re inact the scene just so, I can give the answer.

Just recently, a chap was relating how his brothers are very ruthless with tact and often joke at others expense and then said to me, that I wouldn't survive two seconds in their company, which I did not deny for he spoke a truth. However, I am blasted as being too sensitive or hyper sensitive and never does this come across as nice but heavy with critism, but it was only several hours later, it hit me the answer. I am not hypersensitive but people are nasty. What is funny about joking at others expense? So it is used as an excuse to ease their conscious and to carry on being nasty.

Oh I do not argue that I am sensitive, but I do not go around showing that. Take the classic: wow you look lovely tonight! My first thought is: so I don't every night? But I keep quiet and say thank you.

One person saw a picture of me, when I was younger and said. You were so pretty then! This is French people for you! They are pretty ruthless when it comes to tact.

But I feel I have digressed. I find the late arrival of understanding to be horrible, but like you, never forget once I understand.

My husband is very quick on the spot and does give me some good ideas. I have to just accept that I am slow and work on my positive attributes.

As another aspie said, most of my troubles, come in the form of outside influence, but that is called life, so one has to bare it with dignity. Now where has that dignity vanished to, when I need it?

 

[royinpink]

So, I realized that sometimes after hearing a piece of information and thinking about the meaning of it, it can take me over three months on average to fully process and anylize to understand what something meant. In other cases, up to several years. I'm like an out-dated computer. When I understand something, I never need another explaination, but trying to understand is beyond slow. It can even be annoying. But at least it us efficient and accurate. But slow. In general, how long does it take you to process most difficult pieces of information? Am I the only one who takes this long to process? What is the longest span of time it has taken you to process the meaning of an event, something said, a face made, etc? Any fast 'processers' here?

Oh yes, when it comes to complicated emotional reactions (even my own), it can take me years. You asked for the longest span of time, and I'm not sure, but off the top of my head, 2 1/2 years. As for 'things I should have said' or 'what they probably meant', I'm more likely to get it later that day or the next day. So there's a lot of variation. But it's frustrating because I'm so quick with other things, I expect this to be quick too, and it just...isn't.

 

[King_Oni]

But, who decides what's difficult?

I've ended up realizing certain things after years, while some things add up right away. And those might very well be things some people consider to be "difficult"

 

[Spiller]

I often find myself realising the meaning of something someone said, or the way they acted, from thirty years or more ago!
To my utter chagrin, I recently thought about a girl I knew at college who would sit next to me on the bus, we'd talk some, but I felt anxious and awkward.. I always felt more anxious and awkward back then even than I do now.
College ended and we went our separate ways.
A few weeks ago I was discussing flirting behavior with someone here on AC and suddenly realised the context within which this girl had been acting toward me, then I had a cascade effect of remembering several women I've known over the years before and since and seeing certain words and expressions I'd observed at the time, but made nothing of, within this new (to me) context of flirting.
I could have cried, this was one of those times I wish I was as stupid as the bullies of my youth made me believe!
Instead of seeing wasted opportunities though, I choose to see a bright future

 

[The Penguin]

Each case can vary. For my language based learning disability, it is documented I have slow processing speed. One big issue this can cause is when I was employed. There are too many companies have ridiculous deadlines and it takes me time to process the information.

As I'm not longer working for a company. I'm starting my own business. I did get support from the government to get a living allowance while building my business. If a person has a disability, they can receive more time to be in the program. When I asked for this request, they said they can't consider the idea until after 25 weeks. No one in the program couldn't understand why I need the extra time. After them working with me for 12 weeks, they understand it takes me longer to achieve things. I have many parties making recommendations to grant this extension. I should know the answer within a few weeks.

 

[watersprite]

I agree with King_Oni in that there are some times I've made people aware of an insight or a solution very quickly. But. I have also been realizing important information which was communicated to to me up to decades back. Some of the missed signals and subtle requests, if I had processed them right away, would have changed my life and that of others.

 

[Ylva]

Not sure, since I don't always think about social experiences like that right away. I can't help it, they are often like Silences. I don't know for sure that my subconscious works out the answer to questions I didn't know I had long before it tells me (and promotes the knowledge to conscious awareness), but it seems likely in at least some cases.

 

[The Penguin]

As I'm not longer working for a company. I'm starting my own business. I did get support from the government to get a living allowance while building my business. If a person has a disability, they can receive more time to be in the program. When I asked for this request, they said they can't consider the idea until after 25 weeks. No one in the program couldn't understand why I need the extra time. After them working with me for 12 weeks, they understand it takes me longer to achieve things. I have many parties making recommendations to grant this extension. I should know the answer within a few weeks.

Anyhow, I got my response today. They have mixed feelings of the request so my request is not denied nor approved. They will decided in a few months and see how I progress in the program from that point.

 

[Judge]

Depends on what it is we're talking about that is to be mentally processed. Some things I can process instantly, others may go into a recursive loop where I never quite process them at all.

The simplest way to stump me is to throw sarcasm my way. A warning light comes on, then I try to process it....and simply cannot. After so much time goes by I then switch my processing off and simply surmise that I have just been insulted. Whether I was or not I'll never really know. Privately speaking, it disturbs me to be socially vulnerable in such a way.

 

[Judge]

One thing I think a lot about is how the company I once worked for told me they wanted me to learn Macromedia Flash when I was a web designer. It was one thing that I had a terrible time with attempting to learn all on my own with my own resources.

I remember mentioning what a tough time I was having to our ASP specialist at the time. He sat down and told me in about five minutes what I needed to know that made a light switch on in my mind. It was amazing. How I had such a block on something I thought so complex, and how someone could make sense of it for me in so fast a time!

Turned out I was simply being too logical about it. Thinking of it only in terms of an inelastic timeline going from present to future. It didn't work that way!

I don't think I ever had another experience quite like that. Weird how the mind can work at times...and amazing piece of "hardware" we all have.

 

[Spiller]

Depends on what it is we're talking about that is to be mentally processed. Some things I can process instantly, others may go into a recursive loop where I never quite process them at all.

The simplest way to stump me is to throw sarcasm my way. A warning light comes on, then I try to process it....and simply cannot. After so much time goes by I then switch my processing off and simply surmise that I have just been insulted. Whether I was or not I'll never really know. Privately speaking, it disturbs me to be socially vulnerable in such a way.

Similar for me, though I now choose to assume that the sarcasm is irrelevent, rather than personally offensive - I choose to see no benefit now in feeling bad over someone elses opinion of me, especially when I'm not sure what that opinion is.. I've actually found that a great deal of the time they're just making random noise anyway and that noise changes depending on their mood.
Actually, I'll quantify that, I'm working on this new mindset because I'm tired of feeling judged all the time and I want to be able to get on with what I'm doing without being stopped by anxiety about others..

 

[On the Inside]

This varies on subject.

Mechanical, electrical, structural, abstractions (in art and thought) are generally quick for me.

Interpersonal things, what someone meant by something, peoples motives, whether someone was actually trying to do something, that can take months or years. Sometimes I just don't get it, or I was oblivious (like that girl on the bus, Spiller), other times I know that some form of emotional reaction/preconception is hindering my understanding of things, and I can't clear it away and see things for what they are. If I am thinking something happened this way and for this reason, it can take a bulldozer to move my understanding to what is a more realistic, or reasonable interpretation.

Also, I get bogged down in what might have been my intentions, and if they didn't match up with what happened, I can still think things happened as I intended. I'll fool myself into believing.

 

[Kari Suttle]

When it comes to particularly hurtful events or conversations, i will dwell on it for months or even years, just trying to process it and figure it out. How did i not detect that this person felt this way the whole time? Did they really feel that way or was it just anger speaking? Can anger even really speak and override what a person would otherwise mean to say differently? This is how it is for me with particularly hurtful events, conversation, and bits of information.

Otherwise...yes even if day to day conversation, if i'm stressed or tired or hungry my processing speed slows down a lot. It becomes harder to focus and figure out situations and meanings.

 

[DogwoodTree]

Humor takes me longer than most people...sometimes I get it on just a short delay, sometimes it takes longer, but either way--by the time I "get it", it's too late to laugh and I've worked too hard to feel like laughing anyway. My t today...it's been raining a lot lately, so when we walked in, he said, "Welcome to Seattle!" My DH got the reference right away and started joking back. It took me about 5-10 seconds longer to figure out what the reference was about, and by then the conversation was moving on and there was no time for me to even formulate a response.

Other things take much longer. Usually I'll emotionally process a conversation for about 3-4 days afterwards. Sometimes I'll "get" an inference or deeper meaning about a conversation or facial expression or body language months or even years later. And looking back on my childhood and teenage/young adult years...yes, there are events that, like Spiller, suddenly I'll realize what was going on at that time and put pieces together and something makes a whole lot more sense. But that last part--I think a lot of people do that. All of us are going through a growth and maturation process, so we all--AS and NT alike--can look back and discover things about our past once we have a more mature perspective.

 

[Progster]

Like others who have posted here, I find I don't process things with a deeper or metaphorical meaning very quickly and I don't always get the hidden message or implication behind other people's remarks in conversation. I often find myself analysing a conversation after it happened to understand what happened. I often misinterpret or misread people, and don't realise it until a lot later. It takes me a while to process emotions too, I find other people's emotions difficult to deal with, though I'm good at giving practical advice. When I receive an email with emotional content, I rarely answer straight away, I need to go away and think about it, and what my response will be. Very often I don't post in threads with strong emotional content until a lot later.

 

[Larisa]

I noticed that it takes me 1/2 year to process my conversations with people that matter to me. I keep on analyzing the words said and their meanings, and everything else I've noticed.
I noticed that the newer for me a person, the longer it takes me to figure out their personal 'wirings' and ways of thinking, their priorities and special 'touchy points'. The longer it takes me to understand if my hurting (which is common in most contacts with other people, but a meeting with a new person usually 'strikes' me quite hard) is just a result of my sensitive perception or it was meant to be (to humble me, to give this other person more 'ground' and self-assurance)?
Sometimes it takes me decades to decipher past impacts from different people. Or the situations - that I keep on analyzing to understand if I could do something to influense for a better outcome.
I don't think I really 'overthinking' - it's my partly-concious, partly-subconcious but nevertheless my real life, my way of outliving, feeling and assessing the reality and myself in it.

But this delay in realizing what is going on at present becomes a painful experience if I try to make a better impression on somebody - the more I try the worse it usually appears...
It seems to me though that NT do not fully realize the meaning of what is being said beyond what's necessary for a current situation so they might miss a lot of contexts what other people said or 'slipped' about their real intentions and purposes. And my time-consuming analysis eventually points at these bits of information.

 

[DogwoodTree]

It seems to me though that NT do not fully realize the meaning of what is being said beyond what's necessary for a current situation so they might miss a lot of contexts what other people said or 'slipped' about their real intentions and purposes. And my time-consuming analysis eventually points at these bits of information.

Yes, this. I feel like I read a lot of body language and signals that most people don't seem to be aware of, either as the sender of those messages or as the observer. So I see lots of layers to every interaction, and I'm never sure which layer(s) other people are tuned into. So I tend to respond to messages that many people don't realize they sent. It's like a poorly configured syslog that responds to everything instead of just to the most important stuff. How do you know which parts people intended to communicate? How can you ignore all the other messages that are being sent?

 

[Larisa]

Yes, this. I feel like I read a lot of body language and signals that most people don't seem to be aware of, either as the sender of those messages or as the observer. So I see lots of layers to every interaction, and I'm never sure which layer(s) other people are tuned into. So I tend to respond to messages that many people don't realize they sent. It's like a poorly configured syslog that responds to everything instead of just to the most important stuff. How do you know which parts people intended to communicate? How can you ignore all the other messages that are being sent?

That's it. Not the total missing what's going on and was hinted at - but a variety of possible meanings I can not choose from based on my little knowledge every particular person present and their background.

 

[Ylva]

And if they don't think words are important enough to take literally, why is it so important to them that you use phrases that are void of meaning?