Time frames and Asperger's

[epath13]

I've been trying to set a schedule for myself and have been searching for information about difficulties that people with Asperger's might have while trying to follow a schedule. I have read several times before about some people advising (let's say, to parents of children on the spectrum) to avoid time frames if they become to obsessed with on-time task completion. That children might have a meltdown if something unexpected happens or if they can't complete a task on time. But if we think about real life situation, let's say at school or at work, lots of people have to deal with time frames. If your boss asks you to complete an assignment by June 1st, in some companies an employee could be given a break but, I believe, that in most companies nobody's going to wait for you. And eventually, if you don't complete your assignments within the given time frames, you might be fired. I think if we want to have access to more opportunities in life we have to be able to adjust as much as we can, no matter how difficult it is. Like in this case. It doesn't mean that we have to change who we are but we can't expect everybody else to accommodate us all the time.
I have a huge issue with time frames. Unfortunately I haven't learned how to stay on track and how to deal with anxiety caused by interruptions. I think I would benefit more from learning how to follow a schedule and at the same time how to deal with the anxiety than from not learning it in order to avoid anxiety.

So far I'm using mindfulness method to deal with interruptions. I accept what's happened, acknowledge all the feeling arising, then evaluate the situation and make my decision. But I haven't done it yet with time frames....

Anyway can anyone relate to this? Does anyone have a problem schedules or completing tasks on time? Are there any strategies that you use?

 

[katcha]

I have problems with time. I am unable to comprehend a before or after. I exist now in this moment. And my whole life has transpired in this moment. Primary school, secondary school and college all happened in "this" moment.

I find it very difficult to follow schedules, for I rarely know what the day or date is. I can of course check what the day is, although I tend to forget such information within a minute or two of looking away. I can also sit down to play a computer game for what seems like 5 minutes and then be told by a family member that I was playing away for 24+ hours.

Unfortunately I can't help you too much with strategies. Perhaps it's wrong of me, but my "strategy" tends to revolve around getting people to give me cues of when do to each task. It doesn't have to be people though, it can be environmental cues as well. I think some people use books with pictures, and then turn the page over when the task is finished?

As for work? I think you'd be surprised at how accommodating workplaces can be if you share your issues with them. My advice would be to just tell people your issues at the interview so they can work around them.

 

[Geordie]

I also can't catch up with time, though I do move on.

 

[epath13]

As for work? I think you'd be surprised at how accommodating workplaces can be if you share your issues with them. My advice would be to just tell people your issues at the interview so they can work around them.

I don't think you will be hired at all if you tell people about your issues at the interview. Considering current unemployment situation in the country an employer will most likely to go for someone without any issues

 

[Geordie]

I am thinking of a radiant circle, depicting different timings...

 

[Occasional_Demon]

I'm pretty shoddy at schedules too in general, although if I have to, then I can follow schedules. I wasn't the best at following schedules throughout school and my undergrad years [I'd often hand in work late] but I was able to get by. I found it hard to take schedules seriously though, when the impact is mainly on me - if that makes sense.

I find that it helps if I know that other people are depending on me to complete my task on time and that consequences happen, not only to myself but on other people, if I don't follow a schedule. I remember one time when I was working for the police as part of a major project and basically, I either had to get certain tasks done by <x> date or **** hits the fan and some coppers wouldn't be able to get their jobs done. I found that to be a good motivator!

Strategies for me involves using alarms, post-it notes, written schedules, and maybe a calendar-like Widget on the computer or something like Outlook that can pop up reminders when tasks are due. Post-it notes are the best for me because I can quickly scribble down things and stick them in a conspicuous place. I also find my iPhone to be quite handy, because it can pop up reminders about when tasks are due.

 

[Geordie]

Oh, I can also consider them Thanks

 

[Sandiney]

Speaking about gadgets that help manage time, the apple i-touch has been of immense help to me to keep it together. It has free budgeting, schedule, alarms, diet, and workout apps.

 

[Geordie]

But sometimes, it's hard to pull out from something we're involved in. For example, working on the work we like.

 

[Billi]

I am terrible at time management. Right now, I am stealing the easiest time I can, sleep. I get up 1-1/2hrs before I have to be at work. But I am habitually late to work by about 2 minutes. Fortunately no one seems to care, and I make up the time. I've always been last minute at everything. If I get "involved" in something, forget it. Time passes without me noticing. I don't do dates. I can barely remember my partner of 13 years birthday, have had to count out the years to remember how old I am. Don't know any of my families birthdays, but I can tell you the exact day I bought my bicycles. If my boss says "come see me in about 10 or 15 minutes" I will just go to his office right after I get off the phone. Then I have to wait around for 10 minutes, but the alternative is he calls me back in half an hour wanting to know where I am, when I don't show up. What I dread is when I have a project and my boss wants to know when I expect to complete it. I don't ever know what to say. It's difficult for me to estimate time.
I also show up really early if I have to drive somewhere new, because I have no idea how long it will take me to get there. I hate being late.
As far as dates go, my phone helps keep me straight now. And I use google calendar. I

 

[Geordie]

Is it true that most of us do not really have a good sense of 'time'?

 

[Occasional_Demon]

Maybe. I know that when I'm immersed in something, time just flies away. Other people usually have to nudge me before I realise it's <x> time.

 

[Sandiney]

Actually, I totally understand I have a fit when I have to leave a project and plan it for another day. I'm afraid I'll lose in that moment and the work that I've accomplished.

 

[Sandiney]

Unfotunately, I agree . Not everyone is so understanding.

 

[Geordie]

Then how can we grasp the idea of time?

 

[epath13]

Then how can we grasp the idea of time?

Now I'm thinking maybe we shouldn't try so hard to understand the concept but just accept the fact that certain things have to be done at certain time, set a reminder as someone has mentioned. As about schedules - I also realized (at least it's true for me) that you have to schedule not just the event but the getting there part and sometimes getting ready to get out of the house part I've had 3 meetings schedules recently,. the 1st meeting was at 12pm, I knew I had to be ready by 11:30 so I wouldn't be late. I focused so much on the 11:30 time that I forgot to get ready so 11:15 I realized that I might want to get out of my pajamas and dress the kids and all that which usually takes about an hour So I guess next time I would have to put that hour on my schedule
Anyway the concept of time as we know it has been created by people, I guess to gain a certain level of control in life (if anyone knows more about it you're welcome to share your expertise)...in reality it doesn't really exist, right? so there's nothing wrong with not understanding or not grasping the idea of it Hope it's clear what I'm getting at

 

[epath13]

As about getting lost in a project, sometimes it's OK to allow yourself to do so. If there's something else that you have to do, I find it useful to set a timer and stop, no matter where you're at in the project, when the alarm rings. Usually I just say to myself (I have to do it because of issues with multitasking): it's OK, you can return to this project later. Right not you're done. Do what you need to do next....or something like that It's sort of like when we work with my Autistic kid on some task. When it's time to stop we just say, "all done", now we're going to do this. He might complain for 5 seconds but then follows.

One more thing...maybe sometimes we tend to spend more time on projects that others because of the preoccupation with details. In lots of cases I personally had to tell myself not to get obsessed with certain details because otherwise I will never finish my task...just need to pick the right details not to get obsessed with

 

[Geordie]

Picking up the right details is hard, but thinking of the right focus is not