Switching social modes is a pain

[Poppy98]

Trying to switch between not being a doormat and being myself is hard. You hve to firm with a bully then two seconds later nice with friends. I am not good at this.


Edit to clarify: my concern is that I don't want to accidentally come off too strongly to people who don't deserve it (ex friends).

 

[velociraptor]

Just be you. Anyone who doesn't like it can step off.

 

[the_tortoise]

Trying to switch between not being a doormat and being myself is hard. You hve to firm with a bully then two seconds later nice with friends. I am not good at this.


Edit to clarify: my concern is that I don't want to accidentally come off too strongly to people who don't deserve it (ex friends).

I don't understand this at all...please elaborate?

 

[Outdated]

Edit to clarify: my concern is that I don't want to accidentally come off too strongly to people who don't deserve it (ex friends).

Friends will understand what's going on and probably be pleased that you're finally showing a bit of character.

Coming off a bit too strong as you put it is nowhere near as bad a mistake as what you have been doing. The setting of boundaries is something most people understand and they will judge you by how well you defend those boundaries. Backing down and letting people cross the line will cost you respect, both the respect of your friends and your own self respect.