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Suddeness in anything

Suzanne

Well-Known Member
V.I.P Member
When anything happens suddenly, I find myself totally confused. I remember never being able to answer a sudden question or statement and it would embarrass me and spent a lot of time, trying to get over this and sometimes when I did, I felt so proud of myself.

What alerted me to this, was the other day, my husband and I, were sitting outside, under the sun umbrella and suddenly he lowered it and I could not thing and felt terribly out of control and then, today, I am on zoom and again, suddenly the room got very dark and again, confusion. My husband had equally suddenly closed our shutters.

I have asked him to tell me before he does these things, as I feel totally unhinged.
 
I relate to this. A little forewarning can be so helpful in reducing my anxiety. I do so much better handling sensory stress when I am not on the spot, and I can deal with it a little more slowly.
 
Sometimes l alert myself to the possibility of something happening. So l would be in a room, and l would think to myself, oh yes, l think the shutters will be closed in 45 mins, because my husband prefers them closed at this time.

I do this anticipate thinking quite alot, and it saves me emotional spinouts during a typical day. Not sure if that would help?
 
I have always had delays processing things. Instead of reacting negatively I will take a few minutes to notice what has happened. I am worse with social communication. Unless I pay close attention, I may miss things and only recognize what has happened hours or a day later.
 
I do this anticipate thinking quite alot, and it saves me emotional spinouts during a typical day. Not sure if that would help?
I have tried that, especially with vacations as I had such little time. I learned the hard way that life doesn't stop for vacations, and as reality diverged too far from my mental map, I would shut down. Now, though, I am much improved and can travel while making ad-hoc decisions - that way I am more pleasantly surprised than not.
 
I was going into town with my partner, expecting to do the shops in a certain order, she told me she will go to another shop first and I had a mild panic attack and had to adjust my coping mechanism. I was glad she told me before just driving to the shop. Just things we have to deal with, unfortunately.
 

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