Sometimes I need to be sedated.

[AspieOtaku]

I prefer a gf i get very affectionate i get emotionally attached and clingy so now just cut em off for my own good after being intimate, i get attached and overly affectionate and it wears em out, emotionally draining to em, i just want to love alot and be loved but have to cut em off its gonna end in heartbreak them leaving me for being clingy anyway.Another danger of being codependant of another abusive relationship im a people pleaser its bad.

 

[AspieOtaku]

I just need to be sedated duck duck then take caffiene the next morning.

 

[AspieOtaku]

Im a people pleaser, want a relationship dont want to be alone but can be codependent or overly affectionate.I want love i truly do i give too much but dont get any back.

 

[AspieOtaku]

Want love and be safe, drugs can only do so much. Cannot be sedated forever and alone.Want love dont like being alone forever, want to feel safe and affection and mine appreciated and loved back, crying now i shouldnt cry because im a guy but too many emotions kicking in dont dope me up this time im sorry.Want to be loved back want to be safe, im rocking right now im sorry cant help it trying to comfort myself.Nobody loves me im alone and scared no hugs no nothing, rocking and crying more.

 

[AspieOtaku]

I hate myself nobody loves me want to self harm but fighting it, punched myself and scratched my arms not good not good at all im geting sedated again.

 

[Fino]

You don't need to be sedated and you don't need a girlfriend. In fact, you shouldn't have a girlfriend. It would be selfish of you to enter a relationship while in such an unhealthy state.

I agree that Lithium would be good and Adderall would not be good.

You should probably follow your doctor's recommendations.

 

[AspieOtaku]

Took 2 ativan and some marijuana, no longer want to hurt myself, getting sleepy loving myself again, if nobody loves me i love me i must.I dont feel pain regardless of the scratches theres blood but i can bandage it up in the morning.

 

[Fino]

A woman would be no different a solution than the Ativan--a temporary respite until the illusion fades and misery returns. Your unhappiness has a source other than a lack of some external thing.

 

[AspieOtaku]

You don't need to be sedated and you don't need a girlfriend. In fact, you shouldn't have a girlfriend. It would be selfish of you to enter a relationship while in such an unhealthy state.

I agree that Lithium would be good and Adderall would not be good.

You should probably follow your doctor's recommendations.

current state a gf is unwise either shell leave me or abuse me, i want one but have to fix me want love been a long time, now im groggy feeling cloudy will tend to the wounds on my arms in the morning, the bleeding will stop by then.

 

[Fino]

The right mood stabilizer, anti-depressant, and anxiety medication would change your life, whenever you're done with this.

 

[AspieOtaku]

The right mood stabilizer, anti-depressant, and anxiety medication would change your life, whenever you're done with this.

Trying to balance it out duck duck, omg om so tired, trying to figure things out mind cloudy now going to sleep.

 

[AspieOtaku]

I feel better, i need to love myself and take one task at a time and live in the now.

 

[AspieOtaku]

Got my debit card address fixed and updated took a few calls was anxious but got it fixed, i can relax and get a new card still paying my dui fine on time not going back to jail, i can sleep without meds this time, i love myself im gonna be ok i should not hurt myself anymore, scratches healing, had to clean my bed sheets some blood from my wounds got on em, i need to be kind to myself and focus on the now and not multiple things at once, one at a time.Have to love myself and be there for me if nobody is going to, i want love but am no good if i dont love myself or keep my anxiety in check, if i have a partner and im hurting myself shell be sad and leave me again and ill be alone and more sad.

 

[AspieOtaku]

Forgot to realize im a good singer and sing with my deepest feelings, helps ease anxiety and give another reason not to hate myself i sung to the lonely song at work and coworkers were amazed, my mom before she abandoned me said i sing like an angel.Soothing smooth voice i have used to sing choir when i used to be a child in church, its still there i still have it, forgot i had the talent but have it, forget about the talents due to anxiety and depression but uplifting and removing the shackles of anxiety and depression holding me back.I may be alone but i have me i will always be there for me and love myself if nobody else does.

 

[Fino]

I love you!

 

[AspieOtaku]

I love you!

Not sure how to reply to that, have not heard that from anyone for a long time duck duck but thanks is my appropriate response.

 

[Fino]

Duck duck!!!

 

[Michelle Espinosa]

My anxiety gets out of control, I scream and self harm get in the mode of hating myself to the point of suicidal attempts at times, bloody arms from self inflicted wounds followed by panic and screaming at times I need to be forced to calm down.

I relate so much to this. I suspect I’m on the other end of life being so much older. I went through this countless times.

Here’s what I found out later that helped me (hopefully something useful for you):

It’s okay to take ani anxiety and anti depressant medications in times of acote stress and anxiety. I finally sought help and started taking Wellbutrin and atavax which has been tremendous help in relieving the horrifying anxiety I was going through.

I studied and started trying to practice self care. This means I had a good look at my limitations and strengths as well as what triggers that onslaught of adrenaline and cortisol that made me want to crawl out of my skin and jump off a bridge.

I started to manage my time and activity by assigning priority scores and prep recover times accordingly. “A” activities like public events require a day before and possibly two after. I have to schedule accordingly. “B” events like going to stores or post office, one day before and after, etc according to what I was discovering about my stimulation limitations.

I also started wearing sunglasses even indoors to lower the stimulation. Earphones or earbuds when I shop, etc.

I prioritized the process of figuring this out and implementing plus the continuous implementation.

I hope for you blessings to discover the key to your well being and peace of mind.

 

[AspieOtaku]

I relate so much to this. I suspect I’m on the other end of life being so much older. I went through this countless times.

Here’s what I found out later that helped me (hopefully something useful for you):

It’s okay to take ani anxiety and anti depressant medications in times of acote stress and anxiety. I finally sought help and started taking Wellbutrin and atavax which has been tremendous help in relieving the horrifying anxiety I was going through.

I studied and started trying to practice self care. This means I had a good look at my limitations and strengths as well as what triggers that onslaught of adrenaline and cortisol that made me want to crawl out of my skin and jump off a bridge.

I started to manage my time and activity by assigning priority scores and prep recover times accordingly. “A” activities like public events require a day before and possibly two after. I have to schedule accordingly. “B” events like going to stores or post office, one day before and after, etc according to what I was discovering about my stimulation limitations.

I also started wearing sunglasses even indoors to lower the stimulation. Earphones or earbuds when I shop, etc.

I prioritized the process of figuring this out and implementing plus the continuous implementation.

I hope for you blessings to discover the key to your well being and peace of mind.

Considering doing marijuana more, its Legal in CA Harlequin and Charolettes Web do better than benzos, I feel good, i dont hate myself, i feel good and feel eveything is ok and love myself then fall asleep

 

[AspieOtaku]

Duck duck!!!

i could not help it lol from the duck in your profile, I could say goose after you said duck duck.I just like calling you duck duck because of the duck haha. Duck Duck...Goose, *runs around the circle then sits in the center while everyone chants mush mush. Lol sorry a little silly im on my meds.