Gamma V
Resident ROM Hacker
I've been dealing with this to some extent since 2013, but it has become more concerning in the past couple years. At 4'11", I weigh between 162 and 163 lbs, meaning that I'm clinically obese. It's something my mother constantly nags me about. The main cause for this is my addiction to sugar and soda. I tend to drink at least two 12-oz bottles of regular soda a day. I also have a weakness for chocolate and other sweet treats. I have tried alternatives to soda, and have found certain flavors of Clear American Sparkling Water to be palatable, but, after a while, I'll get a craving for the real thing, get an 8-pack, and finish it in 3-4 days. My mother has tried constant nagging and lecturing, making me watch My 600-lb Life, and telling my stepdad, who does all the grocery shopping, not to buy soda when it shows up on the list. I like to blame this addiction on my autism and on the antidepressant I'm taking, which I've also blamed for the weight gain due to some antidepressants being known to have that as a side-effect.
Yesterday, just hours before joining this forum, my mother asked me if I even care about how much weight I'm gaining and the possibility of losing what little sight I have left to diabetes. When I told her I didn't, she became pretty hurt and just went up to her room. I started wondering if this apathy is just my addiction getting the better of me, an effect of the antidepressant, or a sign that the dosage of antidepressant I've been on for nearly five years is losing its effectiveness. I went so far as to leave a message on my doctor's voicemail asking her to remind me to discuss this issue with her during my next visit, which will be scheduled after she gets the results from a diagnostic panel she had ordered. Now, I'm starting to have second thoughts about increasing my medication. If this addiction and apathy is linked to them, increasing my dosage might make things worse. I don't think lowering the dose is an option, and going off is out of the question. My mother has told me that, although it is my decision to continue or discontinue the medication due to me being an adult, discontinuing means I will no longer be allowed to go out in public because my unmedicated outbursts embarrass her and her health is failing.
Yesterday, just hours before joining this forum, my mother asked me if I even care about how much weight I'm gaining and the possibility of losing what little sight I have left to diabetes. When I told her I didn't, she became pretty hurt and just went up to her room. I started wondering if this apathy is just my addiction getting the better of me, an effect of the antidepressant, or a sign that the dosage of antidepressant I've been on for nearly five years is losing its effectiveness. I went so far as to leave a message on my doctor's voicemail asking her to remind me to discuss this issue with her during my next visit, which will be scheduled after she gets the results from a diagnostic panel she had ordered. Now, I'm starting to have second thoughts about increasing my medication. If this addiction and apathy is linked to them, increasing my dosage might make things worse. I don't think lowering the dose is an option, and going off is out of the question. My mother has told me that, although it is my decision to continue or discontinue the medication due to me being an adult, discontinuing means I will no longer be allowed to go out in public because my unmedicated outbursts embarrass her and her health is failing.