Social skills

[AwkwardSilence]

I found this article helpful, with tips and reminders:

An Adult’s Guide to Social Skills, for Those Who Were Never Taught

 

[Misery]

This all sounds like an awful lot of effort. I mean, I COULD try that stuff, or I could sit at home and just talk to my dog.

Choice seems obvious.

 

[Aspychata]

This all sounds like an awful lot of effort. I mean, I COULD try that stuff, or I could sit at home and just talk to my dog.

Choice seems obvious.

You could teach your dog social skills, lol.

Thought this was a thoughtful proactive article. Some people really do struggle and this article laid it out in a nonchalant manner!

But some of us on the spectrum have the skills, we just don't wish to meet people, and NT's can't quite wrap their head around that concept. I was this way when l was younger and l am still the exactly same. I don't keep myself busy with a bunch of superficial relationships. There are other ways for me to spend time. My mother is very much the same, so was my grandmother. In the past, this type was referred to as *reserved*, now we are viewed as different, with some social stigma. But l can't change who l am nor do l wish too.

 

[Rasputin]

You could teach your dog social skills, lol.

Thought this was a thoughtful proactive article. Some people really do struggle and this article laid it out in a nonchalant manner!

But some of us on the spectrum have the skills, we just don't wish to meet people, and NT's can't quite wrap their head around that concept. I was this way when l was younger and l am still the exactly same. I don't keep myself busy with a bunch of superficial relationships. There are other ways for me to spend time. My mother is very much the same, so was my grandmother. In the past, this type was referred to as *reserved*, now we are viewed as different, with some social stigma. But l can't change who l am nor do l wish too.

You described me in terms of social skills. I am not strongly motivated to meet people, but I have adequate social skills if I do meet someone.

In contrast, there is another guy with ASD where I work that becomes overwhelmed with anxiety any time he comes into contact with someone. He does interact with me some because we have similar hypersensitivity to loud sounds.

 

[Bolletje]

But some of us on the spectrum have the skills, we just don't wish to meet people, and NT's can't quite wrap their head around that concept.

Yeah, that’s me. My various therapists over the years continually pushed me to go out and interact with my friends more, but they failed to understand that I am perfectly happy sitting at home alone and I don’t miss my friends that much. If I want to socialize, I’ll go out and do so without problems. I just prefer my cats, books and boyfriend to other people.

 

[Shamar]

I found this article helpful, with tips and reminders:

An Adult’s Guide to Social Skills, for Those Who Were Never Taught

I did not read the article, mainly because I did not want to join the New York Times and be inundated by spam for the rest of my life. I suspect it would be about as applicable to me as Carnegie's "How to Win Friends and Influence People" or the job search program that told me to use my social/business contacts to network. Mainly, not at all. In all of them there is an explicit assumption that you have the brain connections that allow you to understand social interactions (often called "theory of mind"), even if you never learned how. In my case, I was born without that brain capability, and, while they may be intellectually interesting, they are useless in practical application.

 

[Thinx]

Yes that's it exactly, the Bermuda triangle shaped area in my brain where an NT has a fleet of cruise ships, ferries and disco boats... it'll show up on the brain scans when they get more sophisticated. This is why beyond a certain point, learning about social skills doesn't solve, but is an empty kind of masking.

 

[Aspychata]

The one thing that really makes me growl, is government studies showing that you will live longer by going out and having new and rewarding social interactions. Right - NT's will live longer, but Spectrum souls will become extinct -will die out, and there will be museum exhibits titled when your spectrum neighbor walked the earth. Take those government studies and ........

 

[Gracey]

It's great reaching a certain point in life and realising socialising is more about choice rather than necessity.

I'm excited for that ground breaking moment when those future brain scans reveal my row boat,
as opposed to the Naval Destroyers, Ferries, luxury cruise liners and party boats of others.
Can't wait to say "see, I told ya so"


Interesting link to read. Thanks for posting

 

[Gracey]

The one thing that really makes me growl, is government studies showing that you will live longer by going out and having new and rewarding social interactions. Right - NT's will live longer, but Spectrum souls will become extinct will die out, and there will be museum exhibits titled when your spectrum neighbor walked the earth. Take those government studies and ........

I growl a lot too

 

[Thinx]

It's only about choice in so far as I can choose not to, which is of course an important realisation. The cruise boats don't stop here... However I have always enjoyed rowing, and I can wave to the other wee boats and swimmers as we pass....