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Share good puns and jokes.

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My father brought home a big, complex multi-band German radio, and spent some time studying all the buttons and dials. Finally, he came to a small switch on the back, marked "PU"
"What's a PU?" he asked.
My sister replied 'Two thirds, of a pun."
I don't recall her telling any other jokes.
 
My father brought home a big, complex multi-band German radio, and spent some time studying all the buttons and dials. Finally, he came to a small switch on the back, marked "PU"
"What's a PU?" he asked.
My sister replied 'Two thirds, of a pun."
I don't recall her telling any other jokes.
PU?
That joke stinks...
full
 
The students at Texas Agricultural and Mechanical College are not known as an elite group. Knowing this, when the father of one such Aggie found oil on his farm, he decided to send the boy to Harvard instead. On his first day there, he was trying to find his way around the campus, and stopped another student, asking "Kin yew tell me where the liberry's at?"
Shocked, the New Englander looked him up and down, and replied "I do not know who you are, or from whence you have come, but a Hahvahd, we do not end our sentences with a preposition!"
The aggie hesitated a bit, and then ventured 'Well, awright. Kin yew tell me where the liberry's at, Asshole?"
 
A wife asks her husband, "Could you please go shopping for me and buy one carton of milk and if they have avocados, get 6.

A short time later the husband comes back with 6 cartons of milk. The wife asks him, "Why did you buy 6 cartons of milk?"

He replied, "They had avocados."
 
I was told that the back of the Queen's head was bald, from 70 years of people licking stamps.
 

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