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Share good puns and jokes.

Q: What do you get when you play a country music record backwards?
A: You get you wife back, your truck back, your dog back, your trailer back & your job back...!
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I have a new inspirational motto for when I'm in charge of group tasks:

"Everyone...I want to be remembered for something awesome....but it'll probably just be for this. Who's with me!?"
 
A mother and child are walking in a cemetery together when the child suddenly stops and asks 'Mom, do they usually put two people in a grave together?' The mom says, 'No, why do you ask?' and the kid points to a gravestone and says 'Well this grave says "Here lies a lawyer and an honest man".
 
I wish money was treated the same way as the temperature outside. For example: I have only 92 cents...but it really feels more like 100..............so how about you just go ahead and sell me those $1.00 value fries, homie?
 
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