Processing Emotions

[GoldenRatio]

I wanted to see if other processed emotions relatively similar to how I process them. At night, after my wife and son have gone to bed, I usually stay up for a while and think about the day and let my mind cool down. Typically throughout the day I do not elicit emotions internally, however, at night they seem to catch up to me and I feel very deeply for my wife and son. Obviously, I do love my wife and son during the day, but I don't get those feelings of deep love until night time. I find this frustrating at times because at night I recall situations where it would have been nice to be able to provide these feeling towards my wife. Most of the time during the day, if my wife shows these emotions, I get frustrated because it messes with my routine (something I am working on). Anybody else experience this?

 

[Val2]

I use to be the same way, so here's what I did and I strongly encourage you do this too. At night when all my emotions would rush to me I would write letters to my family members and then leave it on the kitchen counter for them to read in the morning. My family always loved my letters. I found out recently that they kept all the letters too.

 

[jimited]

I can completely relate to this, I think it must be that our minds are over run with other things that are going on during the day. I have ended up in tears because of it and I was always determined that the next day I would try and show how I feel but by the time the morning comes and the chaos of the day my mind is once again over run

 

[jimited]

I use to be the same way, so here's what I did and I strongly encourage you do this too. At night when all my emotions would rush to me I would write letters to my family members and then leave it on the kitchen counter for them to read in the morning. My family always loved my letters. I found out recently that they kept all the letters too.

I like your idea I think I might try this myself

 

[Cyanide Lollipop]

One author I read wrote that she has a checklist to remind her to compliment her husband. I can't remember her name - Liane Holliday Willey perhaps?

 

[lyricalillusions]

I tend to experience emotions as thry come, which is randomly throughout the day/night. But certain feelings, like love for my mother, I only experience whrn away from her usually.

 

[GoldenRatio]

That is a really good idea Val. I had been considering doing that but for some reason (excuse) or another I don't. I really should start doing this because the very few times I have actually done this, the letters are received with a lot of love and welcome. It is so frustrating at times because I will feel warmth and love, but then come daylight my mind is back in overload.

Cyan - I will check out that author, I appreciate it!

lyrica - I am the exact same way with family member, especially my dad.

 

[Neat Hedgehog]

I wanted to see if other processed emotions relatively similar to how I process them. At night, after my wife and son have gone to bed, I usually stay up for a while and think about the day and let my mind cool down. Typically throughout the day I do not elicit emotions internally, however, at night they seem to catch up to me and I feel very deeply for my wife and son. Obviously, I do love my wife and son during the day, but I don't get those feelings of deep love until night time. I find this frustrating at times because at night I recall situations where it would have been nice to be able to provide these feeling towards my wife. Most of the time during the day, if my wife shows these emotions, I get frustrated because it messes with my routine (something I am working on). Anybody else experience this?

It is similar but a little different for me.

I seem to process emotions like there a firewall, in computer terms. It's like something can happen and I'll think something like "Well, ok, how would I feel about this? Would I be sad? Ok, I think it would make me sad. Do I want to feel sad right now? No, I need to finish whatever I'm working on first, I'm not really interested in feeling sad right now. I'll see if I still think it is worth being sad later, but for now... *emotional packet rejected*" Then, later on, when I'm not so busy, I'll go over it, and think "There's nothing much going on right now, I can be sad, until *insert some movie / tv show* comes on and then I need to go to sleep."

Or sometimes later on in the day after I was faced with an unfamiliar scenario: "How should I respond to that? That should have made me mad. Ok, next time something like that happens, I will be mad."

Whatever it is, I will generally mill over it at night, or before I go to sleep, anyway.

Sometimes this has made me wonder if I "feel" quite the same as others do. I mean, is it really a genuine emotion if you first have to decide on what it will be, and then whether or not you feel it and for how long? I have talked to other people who have said they can "ignore" the way they feel, but this seems different, like it is being filtered before it even gets to the executing centers of my brain.

 

[Ste11aeres]

Sometimes I am unaffected emotionally by things, but other times certain things will cause me to be gripped in the jaws of a powerful emotion.
However, I never show emotions to others. In fact, around other people, I don't feel emotions, perhaps because I am so focused on the discomfort of being around them. Actually, maybe that discomfort/annoyance is an emotion.
But for the most part, my emotional life only exists when I am alone.
The exception is with my best friend. I feel strong joy around him.
He is the only person who, outside of this forum, I tell how I am feeling. :cloud9: (For some reason this smiley makes me think of Heaven.)