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Picking on people toughens them up

Kit

Kit

Well-Known Member
V.I.P Member
Some people believe that picking on sensitive people (ones who gets their feelings hurt easily and lets things get to them) toughens them up. I find this true in some cases because it's worked with me and I have seen people online claim they used to be whiny whores or attention whores and they got crap for it and it toughened them up.

I also notice that it seems like very sensitive people (people who get their feelings hurt easily and easily lets things get to them) attract more trolls and bullies. I used to get picked on online more often and get my feelings hurt. I attracted jerks and once I got tough, I got less of them. I quit giving a ****.
 
That is absolute ******** frankly.
There's two ways constant bullying can go:
1) You turn out a psychopath and a misanthrope.
2) You end up self-loathing and feel inferior to everyone.
Sorry but it just pisses me off when people say it toughens you up. ********.
I'm just an aggressive, self-loathing, misanthropic, suicidal *****. There's been no ****ing benefit.
EMZ.
 
Bullying hasn't helped me either. If anything it just makes me aggressive/angry, i'm not really stronger as such. Sometimes I feel I could do some serious damage to bullies but when i'm placed in that situation, I just freeze inside and take everything thrown at me. Afterwards I would get really angry and wished I had defended myself. Like Emor said, it makes me feel inferior to everyone else.

If it has helped you to become tougher or whatever then fair enough, for me though it hasn't.
 
The only reason I don't physically assault people who are assholes to me in the street is because I'm worried I'll get beaten the **** out of 'cause I'm female.
Sometimes I just go down allies hoping someone will pull a knife out at me so I can kick the **** out of them :|. I swear one day I'll get stabbed if something because I overestimate how strong I am.
I've already got my head smashed into a wall 'cause someone was kicking my friend and it pissed me off.
EMZ=]
 
bullying has toughened me up in my opinion, i used to get a ****load of ****, i can deal with it now, all its cost is the fact i have very little faith in humanity now, ill put more in a bit, off for a shower
 
Emor said:
That is absolute ******** frankly.
There's two ways constant bullying can go:
1) You turn out a psychopath and a misanthrope.
2) You end up self-loathing and feel inferior to everyone.
Sorry but it just pisses me off when people say it toughens you up. ********.
I'm just an aggressive, self-loathing, misanthropic, suicidal *****. There's been no ****ing benefit.
EMZ.
Click to expand...

i think ill take option 1 with some of option 2 thrown in
 
It does come at a cost.
Sure, someone can call me a load of **** and I won't burst out crying but the truth is I also believe it and there's times where I honestly hate my self.
Up until a couple of months ago I couldn't even look in the mirror because it hurt too much, and now the only reason I do is because I've come to terms with how I look and accepted I'm disgusting. I still hate what I see though.
Sorry but it just seriously pisses me off that people justify wrecking someone's life by 'it's just for fun' or 'it toughens them up'.
And what's worse is nothing ever happens to these people, and most never see what they've done that is so wrong.
**** I'm seriously pissed off now and depressed as ****.
EMZ.
 
Mike said:
i think ill take option 1 with some of option 2 thrown in
Click to expand...
:lol: ^


The problem is that most bullies operate in groups so if you attack back then one of their groupies will flog you one. That has always been my problem. You defend yourself against the bully and then the next day the bully gets a family member or friend to hit you back for them  - often someone who is much older/bigger than yourself.

I tend to just bottle things up inside then let it all out in one go. One time someone hurt my brother by kicking him off a wall that he was sitting on. I completely flipped. I beat that person down to the ground and repeatedly stomped on his back, jumping up and down on him. When he got up, I chased him out of the estate. People started laughing because the had never seen me like that before. I guess there's only so much crap you can put up with before your violent side takes over.   :o
 
I'm actually a little different, I'm just naturally tough when it comes to comments like those, I just try not to care or bother, sometimes I turn them the other way round and turn things positive against me and the person who tried to attack me, I tend to try and reason and ask them for the reasons why and turn things around. If nothing happens, I just rather not have anything associated with the person.

But this rarely ever happens to me. But IRL I'm not much different but when it gets to the point, I's just explode but it just rarely happens too.

I did used to be sensitive when I was young and would used to take anything bad into heart but that is more like a scenario that happens IRL so basically, that's about it.
 
Emor said:
It does come at a cost.
Sure, someone can call me a load of **** and I won't burst out crying but the truth is I also believe it and there's times where I honestly hate my self.
Up until a couple of months ago I couldn't even look in the mirror because it hurt too much, and now the only reason I do is because I've come to terms with how I look and accepted I'm disgusting. I still hate what I see though.
Sorry but it just seriously pisses me off that people justify wrecking someone's life by 'it's just for fun' or 'it toughens them up'.
And what's worse is nothing ever happens to these people, and most never see what they've done that is so wrong.
**** I'm seriously pissed off now and depressed as ****.
EMZ.
Click to expand...


It used to piss me off as well but I see some truth to that. Look at me.


I don't propose bullying because it can mess people up and give them problems in the future. Heck I had a nervous break down in 6th grade. People who say bullying is part of being a kid and it's all normal are sick ****s. They think it's okay for kids to keep bullying someone until they have a nervous breakdown?
 
Some bullying may toughen some people up. BUT that is never the real reason. Bullies pick on others so that they can feel superior. Because, chances are, they are more ****ed up than the person they are picking on in the first place.

The funny thing is that the bullies who use that as a defence for their behaviour are the first to cry foul when you find a weak spot and turn the insults and/or violence back on them.

My father used this as an excuse for many years. All he ended up with was a family full of ****ed up children who hated his guts and didn't care whether he lived or died.
 
Hiya League Girl.

I thought for a while that being bullied can be in some ways good (but now I realize that is not the case) being bullied is not good, being set straight directly by somebody could be good though. Being bullied can actually give a person the same type of psychological injury as people have from fighting in a war!

I have been bullied for years (mostly just ostracised sometimes bullied), and I don't even usually say much (I know I seem to go on an on on the internet, it's like I can't stop) but in real life I don't talk so much, unless somebody comes up with a topic that is interesting (which rarely happens). And if they do I will still shut up, cause I often have opinions they do not quite understand or care to hear about, and I know in a conversation they will feed off what each other are saying and I won't.
It's like I never fall for Derren Browns' tricks either, because I don't think in the same way, not in the way he expects.

I don't know why I'm like this, have been debating whether it is the result of years of bullying and loneliness or whether I always had a different way of thinking, I think it is the second option, I'm quite sure it is the second option.I just had a break a relief between ages of 9 and 12 when I went to a "special" school where I was accepted for who I was and the kids were really friendly there I felt almost normal.

But what the bullying has done to me is shut me up and make me insecure and loath myself hate myself intensely. And then I have gone to the place where I feel I deserve to feel that way, which is not a nice place.

But at the same time it has been the only thing that has made me a better person, cause I realize I might be the one who is doing something wrong, it could be me as much as anyone.
But to be honest it would have been better if people just directly said what it is a person is doing wrong instead of bullying them and ostracising them because one must try and remember > they perhaps do not realize. (but then I concede that this is not always easy)

and I'm one to talk...
 
The only time I've noticed bullying being a good thing is when it's purely in jest and the people know when they have gone too far, and how far to go for that matter; that also doesn't mean it's gone too far when it's no longer fun for the person doing it, that's just being a dick. Repeatedly bashing and focusing on little things over a period of time will hamper more than it helps.
 
Bullying certainly never toughened me up, so I doubt it would help for other people. That sounds like an excuse the bully would give the teacher, imo. No one bullies with the intent of helping someone out, they are just doing it to be mean. Simply being nice to them would have better results than bullying them.
 
This is what my biological dad and former step-dad thought. They more or less thought I was too soft and smacking me around and telling me how useless I was from five to fourteen didn't exactly change their perceptions.

They just ended up doing it more often. Now I despise just about every male I come across. I really feel like chewing out those who believe this sort of thing.
 
It didn't toughen me up, it actually weakened me.
Years of ******** from kids at school made me paranoid about what people thought of me and I lost trust with a lot of people. I'm glad I had a few friends to make up for it, I'd be ****ed if I didn't have them.
 
@Monkey I had a similar experience with school as well. Especially the worrying about what others in school thought of me bit.
 
Incredible Pie said:
This is what my biological dad and former step-dad thought. They more or less thought I was too soft and smacking me around and telling me how useless I was from five to fourteen didn't exactly change their perceptions.

They just ended up doing it more often. Now I despise just about every male I come across. I really feel like chewing out those who believe this sort of thing.
Click to expand...
I'm the same thing with guys. I think every guy's an asshole if they're offline. I was going to the newsagents today which is right to an all boys high school and I probably past like around 200 of them in total and I was completely pissed off the entire time even though only a couple said something asshole-ish to me.
My Dad's an alright guy though.
It's just guys at school constantly give me ****.
There's only like one or two I like.
(Yeah, I know I have issues with guys :D).
EMZ=]
 
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