http://chronicpainsolutions.org/your-anxiety-isnt-an-excuse-to-be-an-asshole/
I really like the rawness in how this is written.
I really like the rawness in how this is written.
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personal on Natural solutions for anxiety
- Thread starter paloftoon
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Excellent.
On the Inside
Well-Known Member
That is good, I haven't believed the "delicate flower" excuse, haven't used it myself, but I will admit to being the a-hole from time to time, neglecting relationships of all kinds and taking advantage of people's generosity of spirit.
I have, however, tried the "good diet, exercise, job that doesn't push my stressor buttons" approach for a long time, even meditated regularly, and still had anxiety that was debilitating at times. It was better, but not so much that I was the best person I could be. The relaxed job is long gone, I find it harder to exercise as much as I used to (which was quite a lot) and I don't always eat as well as I used to, can't sit still to meditate without falling asleep, so now I've been trying medication for the first time. I'm much less tense, relaxed almost, but I still struggle with interpersonal communication, avoidance etc.
Always thought, erroneously, that I would some day achieve a life that would free me from anxiety. While I still hold out that hope, I know that anxiety is going to be with me in some form or intensity for the duration. I need to learn to live with it, maybe even find a way to harness that energy for a positive outcome.
I have, however, tried the "good diet, exercise, job that doesn't push my stressor buttons" approach for a long time, even meditated regularly, and still had anxiety that was debilitating at times. It was better, but not so much that I was the best person I could be. The relaxed job is long gone, I find it harder to exercise as much as I used to (which was quite a lot) and I don't always eat as well as I used to, can't sit still to meditate without falling asleep, so now I've been trying medication for the first time. I'm much less tense, relaxed almost, but I still struggle with interpersonal communication, avoidance etc.
Always thought, erroneously, that I would some day achieve a life that would free me from anxiety. While I still hold out that hope, I know that anxiety is going to be with me in some form or intensity for the duration. I need to learn to live with it, maybe even find a way to harness that energy for a positive outcome.
ancusmitis
Well-Known Member
I'm sorry, but if you need personal time and you take it, I don't think that makes you an asshole. Of course some people can't afford to do that. That's because we live in a society that refuses to consider people apart from the potential to make profit off of them. Denying people accommodations only feeds into that.
I think about this issue a lot. 
Right now since the new year started and being sick it is true I'm being not enough, and giving up too easily. The neuropsych prescribed medication and told me to either get on medication for the anxiety or, when I balked at taking anything he said then get at least an hour of running 6 days a week. I haven't lived up to that.
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So I need to get more info., & that means either running or pills or both and find out if they help. I disallowed my offspring to go on medication but the doctor talked to me for half an hour until I gave up. I've since allowed the meds for him and he's doing better.
Right now since the new year started and being sick it is true I'm being not enough, and giving up too easily. The neuropsych prescribed medication and told me to either get on medication for the anxiety or, when I balked at taking anything he said then get at least an hour of running 6 days a week. I haven't lived up to that.-
So I need to get more info., & that means either running or pills or both and find out if they help. I disallowed my offspring to go on medication but the doctor talked to me for half an hour until I gave up. I've since allowed the meds for him and he's doing better.
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I am keeping a copy of this to read as there is some good practical advice that i know does help me ( not fix ) cope with overwhelming anxiety. Thanks for posting this 
On the Inside and kestrel, I really relate to your post, I deal with PTSD issues which include debilitating anxiety among other fun symptoms, and the grind of daily life dealing with perpetual anxiety spikes equivalent to suddenly seeing a great white shark about to attack leaves me exhausted.
Exercise, diet etc.. are sometimes simply not an option, i use a small dose of medication and have found it does help,
On the Inside and kestrel, I really relate to your post, I deal with PTSD issues which include debilitating anxiety among other fun symptoms, and the grind of daily life dealing with perpetual anxiety spikes equivalent to suddenly seeing a great white shark about to attack leaves me exhausted.
Exercise, diet etc.. are sometimes simply not an option, i use a small dose of medication and have found it does help,
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weth
Member
I use meds and they ruined almost all of any motivation I had to do anything / I have changed to a softer dose and so far things look / feel better I may even get to the gym soon which is something I miss and really enjoy. My diet sucks I love anything sweet so I'll take the advice that i probably need way more veg and green things in my life.
I appreciate that this isn't a cure like so many have said but anything that can help and any advice is greatly appreciated so thankyou
I appreciate that this isn't a cure like so many have said but anything that can help and any advice is greatly appreciated so thankyou
On the Inside
Well-Known Member
I tried two different meds first, both of which either made me more nervous/jittery or felt like they had no effect. I am now taking a low dose of Clonazepam, usually only at night, though sometimes in the day. I don't take it every day, and it has had no negative effects as far as I can see. I am still able to do things, be motivated, and I sleep so much better (no waking in the middle of the night in a panic).
I know it's no good for me, but I am even able to have a cup of coffee from time to time (love it) and not get bent out of shape.
Good luck to you.
Naturalist
Well-Known Member
Yes, I definitely need to be reminded of this, especially around certain people. My tendency is often to lash out at whatever / whoever is making my life difficult, if I'm not in a position to withdraw from the situation entirely.
It can be a hard lesson to learn that hater are going to hate and, you've got to just let them do that, even when it gets aimed at you. It took me a long time to learn not to let that stuff soak in and affect me but, I did learn.
I choose not to take meds, I did try a couple but, one made me a zombie and the other sent me deeper into depression, which I was battling at the time so, that turned me off to meds and, psychiatrists in general. Also set me on the path of self study and, a few university classes to learn for myself, and off to find working, drug free solutions that work for me.
I know that won't work for everyone and, for some meds do help. Great if that's what works for you but, this article is a good reminder that I'm no "delicate flower" and pulling the spoiled diva act just because my brain doesn't like something that has to be isn't the right way to go. Not that I do that often but, I have been known to do exactly that when I was overloaded and didn't think I could handle even one more stressful situation or event. It works but, at the cost of a lot of headaches and hassles for others. I need to remember that I can always handle just one more thing if I just get off my kiester and handle it, even if I hate it and it pushes me a bit too far. Good, I'll be stronger next time and, it will be that much more before I'm ready to avoid things again.
I choose not to take meds, I did try a couple but, one made me a zombie and the other sent me deeper into depression, which I was battling at the time so, that turned me off to meds and, psychiatrists in general. Also set me on the path of self study and, a few university classes to learn for myself, and off to find working, drug free solutions that work for me.
I know that won't work for everyone and, for some meds do help. Great if that's what works for you but, this article is a good reminder that I'm no "delicate flower" and pulling the spoiled diva act just because my brain doesn't like something that has to be isn't the right way to go. Not that I do that often but, I have been known to do exactly that when I was overloaded and didn't think I could handle even one more stressful situation or event. It works but, at the cost of a lot of headaches and hassles for others. I need to remember that I can always handle just one more thing if I just get off my kiester and handle it, even if I hate it and it pushes me a bit too far. Good, I'll be stronger next time and, it will be that much more before I'm ready to avoid things again.
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I think many NTs also struggle with social situations.
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